Thursday Billboard Update - 11/29/12

Rihanna's Unapologetic takeover at #1 this week with 238,000 copies sold. It is the shitty singer's first chart topping album. Keyshia Cole's Woman To Woman debuts at #10 with 95,900 copies sold.

In addition to topping the Billboard 200, Rihanna also remains atop the Hot 100 for a 2nd week with Diamonds. She's the first artist to hold both top spots since Adele's 21 and Set Fire To The Rain did it back in February.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Rihanna - Unapologetic (1)
2. Taylor Swift - Red (2-2)
3. One Direction - Take Me Home (1-3)
4. Phillip Phillips - The World From The Side Of The Moon (4)
5. Kid Rock - Rebel Soul (5)
6. Rod Stewart - Merry Christmas, Baby (6-6)
7. P!nk - The Truth About Love (22-7)
8. Jason Aldean - Night Train (13-8)
9. Led Zeppelin - Celebration Day (9)
10. Keyshia Cole - Woman To Woman (10)

• Pitbull's Warning debuts at #14 with 63,800 sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Rihanna - Diamonds (1-1)
2. Ke$ha - Die Young (3-2)
3. Maroon 5 - One More Night (2-3)
4. Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven (4-4)
5. Psy - Gangnam Style (7-5)
6. fun. - Some Nights (5-6)
7. Lumineers - Ho Hey (8-7)
8. Phillip Phillips - Home (12-8)
9. Flo Rida - I Cry (10-9)
10. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (6-10)

• Pitbull's Don't Stop The Party soars 31 spots 61-30.
• 2 Chainz's I'm Different flies 19 spots 98-79 in its 2nd week.
• Wiz Khalifa's Remember You featuring The Weeknd debuts at #98.

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Mystikal Monday Ep. 8

I'm already tired of Baby making Mystikal jump on records with Cash Money's C and D-team.

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50 Cent - My Life (feat. Eminem & Adam Levine)

Much like the T.I./Andre 3000 track, I'm not sure why 50 didn't save this as a pleasant surprise on the album, but the song is dope.

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T.I. - Sorry (feat. Andre 3000)

Wow. Just wow.

Why wouldn't T.I. save this one for when the album dropped? I know he's kinda cold out here right now (well for T.I.'s standards at least), but this track is special, he should've saved it. Oh well, I am grateful to have heard it because it is incredible, so thank you Tip.

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Harrison Barnes Destroys Nikola Pekovic

Goodness. Goodness, goodness, goodness. Shout out to DeMarcus Cousins too, but goodness.

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Gangnam Style Passes Bieber's Baby As Most Watched YouTube Video

My brother and I had been monitoring this for the past few weeks and it finally happened, Psy's Gangnam Style is now the most watched video in YouTube history. Gangnam Style passed Justin Bieber's Baby some time Saturday, and is well on it's way to becoming the first billion-view video in YouTube history. In fact, Psy's smash hit it moving at such an outrage pace that it's possible it could hit that billion-view mark before the year is up.

Remarkable, especially considering that it's only existed for the past 4 months. To put that into prospective, the NBA's YouTube channel has been around since November 2005 and currently has just under 980,000,000 views total. YouTube's most subscribed to user, Ray William Johnson, has been on YouTube since May 2008 and has 6.2 million subscriber, he "just" reached his 2 billionth view last month. Pys is the new king of YouTube.

SOURCE

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 12

1) Packers (7-3) @ Giants (6-4)
Even though I'm sure the Giants have properly psyched themselves into believing that nobody believes in them, I still think the Packers leave town with a win. They won't have Clay Matthews around to help the cause, but as long as Aaron Rodgers goes out and doesn Aaron Rodgers things, Green Bay should be fine. Packers winners, Giants losers.

2) 49ers (7-2-1) @ Saints (5-5)
Jim Harbaugh still hasn't announced who his starter is gonna be in New Orleans, so I think we're still supposed to act like he didn't pick Colin Kaepernick days ago. When the switch becomes official, I do believe this will be the first time in NFL history that a QB with a 70% completion percentage, 100+ passer rating, and only 5 interceptions has been benched. 49ers winners, Saints losers.

(Side note: Doesn't Colin Kaepernick look like He Pingping, the decease former shortest man in the world?)

3) Falcons (9-1) @ Buccaneers (6-4)
Tampa Bay is 5-1 since their bye week and Atlanta continues to look shaky every week, which means Atlanta is definitely winning this game. It only makes no sense. Falcons winners, Buccaneers losers.

4) Vikings (6-4) @ Bears (7-3)
Jay Cutler has been cleared to play, but I was gonna pick Chicago to win anyway because the Vikings are not the 49ers. Then again, as bad as their offensive line was Monday, 0% of the population would be surprised if Jared Allen and crew re-concussed Cutler. Bears winners, Vikings losers.

5) Bills (4-6) @ Colts (6-4)
Good win by the Bills last week, but I like the Colts to bounce back at home after getting spanked by the Pats last week. Colts winners, Bills losers.

6) Ravens (8-2) @ Chargers (4-6)
Baltimore will make up for all the touchdowns they didn't score last week in Pittsburgh this week in San Diego. Ravens winners, Chargers losers.

7) Steelers (6-4) @ Browns (2-8)
Pittsburgh is on its 3rd starting quarterback in 3 weeks, is that ever a good thing? Meanwhile, Cleveland has played tough all season and if they cut down on the stupid mistake, I don't see why they couldn't win this. Browns winners, Steelers losers.

8) Seahawks (6-4) @ Dolphins (4-6)
Seattle's sole road win came against the 2-win Carolina Panthers, but Miami has looked so pathetic the last couple weeks that I just can't take them until they show me something. Seahawks winners, Dolphins losers.

9) Rams (3-6-1) @ Cardinals (4-6)
Man, what happened to the Rams last week? I really don't want to pick the Cardinals, but how can I pick a team that got killed by the Jets last Sunday? Cardinals winners, Rams losers.

10) Raiders (3-7) @ Bengals (5-5)
Last season Carson Palmer was so adamant about not playing for the Bengals that he decided to retire. This Sunday he returns to Cincinnati for the first time as an Oakland Raider. This one could get ugly. Wait, what am I saying? The Raiders are playing in this game, this one will get ugly. Bengals winners, Raiders losers.

11) Broncos (7-3) @ Chiefs (1-9)
Not that Denver needs to do it, but their mascot is a bronco and Eric Berry is scared of horses. Hmmm, they might wanna keep that one in their back pocket just in case the Chiefs ever get a competent coaching staff. Broncos winners, Chiefs losers.

12) Titans (4-6) @ Jaguars (1-9)
This a divisional game, so it should be close, but I think the Jags are pretty much done winning for this season. Titans winners, Jaguars losers.

13) Panthers (2-8) @ Eagles (3-7)
Am I really gonna pick the Panthers again? I guess I have to, but I really, really don't want to. Gosh, I hate this game so much. Panthers winners, Eagles losers.


Thanksgiving Games
Texans (9-1) @ Lions (4-6)
I really don't know what to make of the Lions, one week they seem to play good, the next they don't. One thing I do know is that the Texans severely underestimated the Jaguars Sunday and that won't happen again. Texans winners, Lions losers.

Redskins (4-6) @ Cowboys (5-5)
Judging solely by the games of this past Sunday, you'd have to say Washington has the edge coming into Thanksgiving, right? The Redskins destroyed the 3-win Eagles while the Cowboys struggled with the 2-win Browns. That's a huge reason I initially was gonna go with the visitors, but then I remembered Tony Romo is 5-0 in Thanksgiving Day games and 13-0 at home in November. Plus, rookie QBs are 1-3 in Thursday games this year, with the only win coming by Andrew Luck against the 1-win Jaguars. The Cowboys' offensive line worries the shit out of me (down to the 3rd string center; best lineman Tyron Smith is questionable for this game), and I think it's gonna be a close game, but... Cowboys winners, Redskins losers.

Patriots (7-3) @ Jets (4-6)
I've been hearing a lot people say it's not Bill Belichick's fault Rob Gronkowski got hurt blocking for New England's 59th point last Sunday, but I'd beg to differ. Yes, your field goal unit is your field goal unit, but why were they still scoring garbage touchdown when the game was clearly over? A 21 point lead wasn't big enough, they had to push it to 28? A 28 point lead wasn't big enough, they had to push it to 35? It would be one thing if the defense scored the touchdowns, but the offense did. I'm sorry, Gronkowski's broken forearm is as much Belichick's fault as it is whoever's body Gronk broke it on.

As far as the Pats-Jets game goes, I know the Jets got a win last week, but they're still pathetic. I wanna take the upset because I hate the Pats, but I just don't see it happening. Patriots winners, Jets losers.

This Week: 11-5 (.686)
Last Week: 11-3 (.786)
Season: 113-62-1 (.645)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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Trick, Don't Eat My Thigh (Kendrick Lamar Parody)

Yes, yes, and more yes! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

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KeKe The Adopted Tabby Cat Drops First Single!

Wow. My mind has been blown. Very rare, must collect!

Speaking of things you must collect, Lil B's new mixtape Crime Fetish dropped today! Fuck Thanksgiving, ThanksyouBasedGod!

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The Rap Battle 5

He said it was coming...and it actually came! Ladies and gentlemen, Rap Battle 5 featuring...Soulja Boy?? Well that's random, but for once in his life, he doesn't disappoint. Enjoy!

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Thursday Billboard Update - 11/22/12

One Direction's Take Me Home dethrones Taylor Swift's Red after 3 weeks atop the Billboard 200 with 540,000 albums sold. The Weeknd's Trilogy debuts at #4 with 86,300 copies sold. Christina Aguilera's Lotus debuts at #7 with 73,000 sold. Green Day's ¡Dos! starts at #9 with 69,000 sold, and Lana Del Rey's Paradise begins at #10 with 67,000 sold.

One week after tying Carly Rae Jepsen's Call Me Maybe for the longest run at #1 in 2012, Maroon 5's One More Night (1-2) gets dethroned by Rihanna's Diamonds (2-1).

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. One Direction - Take Me Home (1)
2. Taylor Swift - Red (1-2)
3. Various Artists - The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 sdtk (3)
4. The Weeknd - Trilogy (4)
5. Soundgarden - King Animal (5)
6. Rod Stewart - Merry Christmas, Baby (3-6)
7. Christina Aguilera - Lotus (7)
8. Various Artists - Now 44 (2-8)
9. Green Day - ¡Dos! (9)
10. Lana Del Rey - Paradise (10)

• Travis Barker and Yelawolf's Pycho White EP debuts at #50 with 11,100 sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Rihanna - Diamonds (2-1)
2. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-2)
3. Ke$ha - Die Young (3-3)
4. Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven (6-4)
5. fun. - Some Nights (4-5)
6. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (8-6)
7. Psy - Gangnam Style (5-7)
8. Lumineers - Ho Hey (13-8)
9. Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (7-9)
10. Flo Rida - I Cry (10-10)

• Justin Bieber's Beauty And A Beat featuring Nicki Minaj soars 18 spots 38-20.
• Adele's Skyfall hops 12 spots 33-21.
• Nicki Minaj's Va Va Voom flies 20 spots 46-26.
• Macklemore & Ryan Lewis' Thrift Shop jumps 13 spots 55-42.
• P!nk's Try flies 19 spots 69-50.
• Pitbull's Don't Stop The Party jumps 20 spaces 81-61.
• The Weeknd's Wicked Games skips 10 spots 91-81.
• Christina Aguilera's Just A Fool debuts at #92.
• 2 Chainz's I'm Different debuts at #98.

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NBA Debuts Wack New Jerseys For Christmas

Love the commercial, hate the jerseys.

Whether it's the weird throwbacks (Pittsburgh Steelers, Miami Heat, etc.), lame alternates (Denver Nuggets, San Antonio Spurs, etc.), the Oregon Ducks change color combination every weekend, or these abominations, why can't they just leave the damn uniforms alone??

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Dikembe Mutombo's 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World

This is cool, check out Old Spice's new holiday campaign with Dikembe Mutombo! You can actually hit the start button on the video and play this game on Old Spice's website. Whatever, I'm just happy the Greg Jennings campaign is over.

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Jay Pharoah's Katt Williams Impression Is Spot On

The impression itself was funnier than the bit, that shit was great! Shout out to Jay Pharoah.

And since we're on SNL skits, here's another one of my favorites from last night.

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 11

This week's Hot Pod podcast!

1) Ravens (7-2) @ Steelers (6-3)
Pittsburgh is 4-0 at home this season, but sadly for them, they're 0-4 in games against Baltimore without Ben Roethlisberger. Ravens winners, Steelers losers.

(Side note: Who wants to bet Big Ben is back from this "multiple week injury" just in time to play Dallas in Week 15?)

(Side side note: Why does Byron Leftwich look so much like Doug E. Fresh?

2) Colts (6-3) @ Patriots (6-3)
The Colts visiting the Patriots with no Peyton Manning seems weird, doesn't it?

Now I do like Andrew Luck and the new Colts, and they have won their last 2 road games (though they only beat the Titans and Jaguars), but I just can't see them winning this particular game. It would be different if they did the Chuck Pagano head shave thing this week, but they already played that card, so unless they have a new Chuck Strong ploy, I gotta go with New England. Patriots winners, Colts losers.

3) Bears (7-2) @ 49ers (6-2-1)
This was supposed to be a battle of back-up QBs, but apparently Alex Smith has passed his concussion tests and is on track to start Monday night. It's not that I think Smith is that much better than Jason Campbell, but I'm still taking them to do more than just tie this week. 49ers winners, Bears losers.

4) Packers (6-3) @ Lions (4-5)
So much for the Lions being a team trending up, they went out and got spanked by a Vikings team who had loss 3 of their last 4 game by 10+ coming in. The Pack should make quick work of the Lions coming off a bye, even though they won't have the benefit of Clay Matthews. Packers winners, Lions losers.

5) Chargers (4-5) @ Broncos (6-3)
I know it's weird to think about it because the Broncos ultimately won the game, but the Chargers were up 24-0 in their Week 6 matchup. Can San Diego get up big again and finish Denver off this time? Yes. Will they? No. Broncos winners, Chargers losers.

6) Dolphins (4-5) @ Bills (3-6)
Man, the Dolphins looked as horrible last week Sunday as we all figured they'd look before the season. I don't know if 4 days is enough to shake off that stink, plus Buffalo really should've won that game against New England. Bills winners, Dolphins losers.

7) Eagles (3-6) @ Redskins (3-6)
Nick Foles (aka Sunshine from "Remember The Titans") will get his first career start, and also, I say his first career victory. I love RGIII, but the 'Skins are 1-8 in their last 9 home games and 0-8 against rookie QBs since 1970. Eagles winners, Redskins losers.

8) Cardinals (4-5) @ Falcons (8-1)
Not that Atlanta is some juggernaut or anything like that, but they just aren't losing 2 games in a row, especially win the second one is against the garbage ass Cardinals. If they grab a lead of at least 7 points, it's a wrap. Falcons winners, Cardinals losers.

9) Buccaneers (5-4) @ Panthers (2-7)
I stupidly picked Carolina to upset Denver last week, so they're no way I'd do it again, right? Right?! Wrong :-(. Panthers winners, Buccaneers winners.

10) Jets (3-6) @ Rams (3-5-1)
How fucked up was it that a bunch of Jets players anonymously shitted on Tim Tebow this week? I'm sure a much needed team win won't be the outcome. Rams winners, Jets losers.

11) Browns (2-7) @ Cowboys (4-5)
All I've heard about this week is how weak Dallas' remaining schedule is. Do you know what that means? Yep, they're gonna fuck it up as usual. Look for this game to a lot closer than it ever should be, though I do think the 'Boys will pull it out. Cowboys winners, Browns losers.

12) Saints (4-5) @ Raiders (3-6)
Oakland has allowed 97 points in the past 2 weeks alone, which means New Orleans cracking 70 isn't out of the question. Boy, what a great week to be facing Drew Brees in fantasy. Saints winners, Raiders losers.

13) Bengals (4-5) @ Chiefs (1-8)
The Chiefs actually showed some fight in them Monday night. Now I don't know if that was because they turned over a new leaf or just to spite their former coach (and current Steelers offensive coordinator) Todd Haley. I'm going with the latter and saying they don't have a repeat performance Sunday, much like they didn't the week after their first win. Bengals winners, Chiefs losers.

14) Texans (8-1) @ Jaguars (1-8)
Welp, this won't be close. Texans winners, Jaguars losers.

This Week: 11-3 (.786)
Last Week: 8-5-1 (.607)
Season: 102-57-1 (.641)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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Awkward Black Girl Season 2 Ep. 6 - The Waiter

How about Sujata Day (CeCe) and those yoga poses?! Man, man, man! I may or may not have run that scene back several times since watching the new episode earlier. Either way, I was so immersed in the scene that I ended up asking this fairly stupid question about Issa Rae's wardrobe choice in the next scene:

To blend in! RT @fiyahmuzik: Was there any hidden meaning behind @issarae being dressed like Waldo at the sex shop?
— Issa Rae (@IssaRae) November 17, 2012

Gee, that wasn't obvious at all. I'm a idiot, but to be fair to myself, a lot of my blood was flowing elsewhere at the time.

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Awkward Black Girl Season 2 Ep. 5 - The Interview

How in the fuck did I miss this episode? I'm fuckin' trippin'!

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Thursday Billboard Update - 11/15/12

Taylor Swift's Red remains at #1 for a 3rd straight week with another 196,200 copies sold. Ne-Yo's R.E.D. debuts at #4 with just 66,100 copies sold. I guess this is what happens when R&B artists stop making R&B music. Meek Mill's Dreams & Nightmares falls to #8 in its 2nd week with 41,100 sold. Lastly, Kendrick Lamar's good kid, m.A.A.d. city slides to #9 with 40,100 copies sold.

Maroon 5's One More Night ties Carly Rae Jepsen's Call Me Maybe for longest streak atop the Hot 100 in 2012 9 weeks. Putting the pressure on Maroon 5 is Rihanna's Diamonds, which rises to #2 and replaces Psy's Gangnam Style (2-5). Entering the top 10 is Flo Rida's I Cry (12-10).

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Taylor Swift - Red (1-1)
2. Various Artists - Now 44 (2)
3. Rod Stewart - Merry Christmas, Baby (3-3)
4. Ne-Yo - R.E.D. (4)
5. Aerosmith - Music From Another Dimension (5)
6. Jason Aldean - Night Train (4-6)
7. Mumford & Sons - Babel (7-7)
8. Meek Mill - Dreams & Nightmares (2-8)
9. Kendrick Lamar - good kid, m.A.A.d. city (5-9)
10. Third Day - Miracle (10)

• E-40 and Too $hort have 2 collaborative albums debuting this week, the first is History: Function Music at #62 with 6,500 copies sold, and the second is History: Mob Music at #71 with 5,800 sold. Not sure who told E-40 we need multiple albums from him at a time, but he needs to chill.
• Debuting at #189 is Saigon's Greatest Story Never Told Chapter 2 with a measly 2,800 sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Rihanna - Diamonds (4-2)
3. Ke$ha - Die Young (6-3)
4. fun. - Some Nights (3-4)
5. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-5)
6. Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven (7-6)
7. Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (5-7)
8. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (10-8)
9. Alex Clare - Too Close (9-9)
10. Flo Rida - I Cry (12-10)

• Ed Sheeran's The A Team hops 9 spots 35-26.
• Adele's Skyfall from the new 007 movie soundtrack flies 23 spots 56-33.
• Justin Bieber's Beauty And A Beat featuring Nicki Minaj jumps 16 more spots 54-38.
• Nicki Minaj's Va Va Voom shoots 23 spots 69-46.
• Macklemore & Ryan Lewis' Thrift Shop jumps 11 spots 66-55.
• P!nk's Try flies 24 spots 93-69.
• Ludacris' Rest Of My Life featuring Usher and David Guetta debuts at #72.
• Pitbull's Don't Stop The Party slides 10 spaces 91-81.

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Grand Theft Auto V Trailer #2!

YES, YES, YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Lakers Hire Phil Jackson Mike D'Antoni

I would say I'm stunned, but I think enough people have said that enough since the news broke the Lakers said fuck Phil Jackson and went with Mike D'Antoni as their next head coach. This should be interesting, but I'm not sure the Lakers have the personnel to run his offense. Either way, I'm sure OKC is as excited about the Lakers hiring D'Antoni over Jackson as the Lakers were when they traded James Harden to the Rockets. This is the most retarded arm's race ever.

SOURCE

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Obama's Complete Victory Speech

I actually almost didn't post this because he shouted "2 TERMZ!" at the beginning and I'm already tired of people shouting that shit, but the lyrics were just too good.

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 10

The latest Hot Pod podcast is below, but the quality got fucked up some up when it was uploaded, so if you want to hear it more clearly, you can download it from this link. Enjoy.

1) Texans (7-1) @ Bears (7-1)
This game should be a great game between 2 pretty evenly watched teams, and I like Houston to redeem themselves on national TV after that debacle against Green Bay in Week 6. Texans winners, Bears losers.

2) Falcons (8-0) @ Saints (3-5)
I'm always weary of game where everyone picks the underdog to win and I've heard too many people picking the Saints. Falcons winners, Saints losers.

3) Broncos (5-3) @ Panthers (2-6)
Don't ask me why, but this is my upset special for the week. I don't know. Panthers winners, Broncos losers.

4) Jets (3-5) @ Seahawks (5-4)
Antonio Cromartie said the Jets are gonna make the playoffs this year. I'm assuming he thinks they're going to bounce back from 3-6 and run the table because they are not beating Seattle in Seattle. Seahawks winners, Jets losers.

5) Bills (3-5) @ Patriots (5-3)
I really don't know what to say about this game besides that I definitely have New England winning it. Patriots winners, Bills losers.

6) Giants (6-3) @ Bengals (3-5)
Wasn't Cincinnati just over .500? Now they have the same shitty record as my Cowboys. Damn. Oh well, I expect that to get worse when the ol' fuck ass G-Men come to town. Giants winners, Bengals losers.

7) Lions (4-4) @ Vikings (5-4)
This divisional battle is simple: Detroit is trending up and Minnesota is trending down. Lions winners, Vikings losers.

8) Raiders (3-5) @ Ravens (6-2)
Man, what happened to the Raiders last week? They had only allowed 2 other running backs to rush for over 50 yards this whole season, then BOOM! Doug Martin explodes for 251. Of course Oakland got a few lucky breaks by not having to face Maurice Jones-Drew, Jamal Charles, Rashard Mendenhall, and Ryan Matthews (whether because they were hampered injury or coaching ineptitude), but still! Whatever, if the Ravens are smart, they rush Ray Rice 25-30 times and cruise to victory. Ravens winners, Raiders losers.

9) Chargers (4-4) @ Buccaneers (4-4)
News flash! Doug Martin hates his nickname "Muscle Hamster." Hmmm, I wonder why that is? Oh yeah, BECAUSE ITS A SHITTY NICKNAME! What the fuck does that even mean? If I was Martin, I'd react to people who called me Muscle Hammer the same way black people used to react when white people called them a nigga. Buccaneers winners, Chargers losers.

10) Rams (3-5) @ 49ers (6-2)
The Rams should be getting Danny Amendola back this week, so all won't be loss. 49ers winners, Rams losers.

11) Cowboys (3-5) @ Eagles (3-5)
On Monday, the awful Saints defense absolutely shredded the Eagles' offensive line, but you watch the Cowboys not get a hand on Michael Vick in this game. I still like the Cowboys to win, but it will only be because Philly will make one more stupid mistake than Dallas. I think. Cowboys winners, Eagles losers.

12) Titans (3-6) @ Dolphins (4-4)
The Dolphins have been fairly good against the run this season, so I'm not expecting much from Zombie Chris Johnson here. Dolphins winners, Titans losers.

13) Colts (5-3) @ Jaguars (1-7)
"Colts shave heads to support Pagano." That headline is all the information I need to pick this game. Colts winners, Jaguars losers.

14) Chiefs (1-7) @ Steelers (5-3)
Anybody got the Chiefs here? Thought not. Steelers winners, Chiefs losers.

This Week: 8-5-1 (.607)
Last Week: 12-2 (.857)
Season: 91-54-1 (.628)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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Thursday Billboard Update - 11/8/12

With another 344,200 copies sold, Taylor Swift's Red remains atop the Billboard 200 for a 2nd week. Starting off at #2 is Meek Mill's Dreams & Nightmares, which sold 164,800 copies in its first week. Kendrick Lamar's Album of the Year contender, good kid, m.A.A.d. city, slides 3 spots to #5 with 62,800 copies sold.

Same ol' same ol' over on the Hot 100, nothing to see over there.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Taylor Swift - Red (1-1)
2. Meek Mill - Dreams & Nightmares (2)
3. Rod Stewart - Merry Christmas, Baby (3)
4. Jason Aldean - Night Train (3-4)
5. Kendrick Lamar - good kid, m.A.A.d. city (2-5)
6. Toby Keith - Hope On The Rock (6)
7. Mumford & Sons - Babel (4-7)
8. Neil Young & Crazy Horse - Psychedelic Pill (8)
9. Trans-Siberian Orchestra - Dreams Of Fireflies (On Christmas Night) EP (9)
10. Little Big Town - Tornado (10)

• Tech N9ne's Boiling Point (K.O.D. Collection) debuts at #30 with 13,000 sold.
• Sean Price's Mic Tyson debuts at #59 with 7,000 sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. fun. - Some Nights (3-3)
4. Rihanna - Diamonds (5-4)
5. Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (11-5)
6. Ke$ha - Die Young (4-6)
7. Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven (7-7)
8. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (6-8)
9. Alex Clare - Too Close (8-9)
10. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (9-10)

• Justin Bieber's Beauty And A Beat featuring Nicki Minaj jumps 16 spots 70-54.
• Macklemore's Thrift Shop hopped 11 spots 77-66.
• Nicki Minaj's Va Va Voom soars 29 spots 98-69.
• A$AP Rocky's Fuckin Problems with Drake, 2 Chainz, & Kendrick Lamar debuts at #73. Still not sure how or why 2 Chainz was brought into the mix, but whatever.
• Chris Brown's Don't Judge Me debuts at #95.
• The Weeknd's Wicked Games debuts at #96.

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VOTE!

Alright now, today is the day, let's make it happen!

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MORE Fiyah & Andy!

Just in case you forgot about our 2nd channel, here's a little reminder. Also, all 3 of the video I promoted in the video above are after the jump below!

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Children's Theater Critic

This. Is. So. Fucking. GOOD!

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Will Ferrell & Kevin Hart Want You To Vote!

I can't believe it's almost Election Day all over again, but I'm excited!

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Uncle Drew: Chapter 2

Great video (again), but goodness their old men voices were awful lol. They should have had Bill Russell do voiceovers instead of making a cameo.

On another note, watching this video makes me sad that Kevin Love is out with that hand injury. You may or may not have known this, but once upon a time Kevin Garnett was my favorite player and Minnesota was my favorite team. Then he got traded to Boston (a team I've always hated) and I started rooting on my #2 team (Miami) full time, but a soft spot for Minnesota remained. That's why I campaigned for Bill Simmons to become their GM in '09 and was so disappointed when they stupidly drafted Jonny Flynn over Steph Curry. Oh well, I just hope Big Love is back and healthy soon.

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Kevin Durant Keeps Ducking Lil B On The Court

Just fast forward to 3:40 and hear about how afraid Kevin Durant is of Lil B on the basketball court. Yeah, Kevin Durant can do this, but he's never played the Based God aka the best point guard on the West coast (Chris Paul included).

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Chris Rock's Message For White Voters

He's juuuuuuuuust white!

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I Told My Kid I Ate All Their Halloween Candy Again

After 33 million YouTube views last year, there was no chance Jimmy Kimmel Live wasn't running this bit back again. Smart decision, though we shouldn't be surprised because this show makes a ton of them.

Anyway, we can only pray we have kids like the ones in the last 3 videos and not like the ones in the first however-many, especially not like that future felon in a diaper at 1:48. That kid looks like a daily terror.

Check out this other great Halloween prank video by Cousin Sal and the fine folks at Jimmy Kimmel Live.

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 9

Hey, I just realized something: it's no longer October so no more accessories during games! Yes!

1) Steelers (4-3) @ Giants (6-2)
I originally intended on picking the Steelers here because of how good they looked last week, but this whole "We can't find a hotel to accommodate us so we're flying in the day of the game" shit is worrying me. Sure, they're only flying from Pittsburgh to New Jersey (that flight can't be much longer than an hour, if that), and sure, the Giants players have probably been inconvenienced themselves all week, but it still seems odd. Fuck it, I'm gonna stick with my pick this week (last week I switched my Steelers pick because of their uniforms and they won convincingly). Steelers winners, Giants losers.

2) Cowboys (3-4) @ Falcons (7-0)
Dallas is 0-7 in its last 7 Sunday night games. Yes, Tony Romo is essentially the anti-Manning when it comes to night games. All isn't bad though, Dallas is actually 3-0 in its last 3 games against opponents that were 7-0 or better when they played, with the last one coming in 2009, the same year they last won a Sunday night game. Cowboys winners, Falcons losers.

(Side note: Falcons fans shouldn't feel too bad about potentially losing this game because all 3 of those 7-0 or better teams the Cowboys beat went on to win the Super Bowl.)

3) Panther (1-6) @ Redskins (3-5)
Cam Newton vs. Robert Griffin III, now this should be fun! Am I crazy for thinking the Panthers could win totally win this game? I mean, they nearly beat the Bears last week, and there's a chance the Redskins are still blinded after lining up across from those hideous Steelers uniforms for 3 straight hours from last week (that's my excuse for Ft. Lauderdale's own Leonard Hankerson dropping balls and I'm sticking to it). I don't know if you can really upset a team that's also under .500, but this is my upset special. Panthers winners, Redskins losers.

4) Eagles (3-4) @ Saints (2-5)
New Orleans is giving up 30.9 points per game and an NFL-worst 474.7 yards per game, if Michael Vick doesn't light them up, maybe it is time for the Eagles to make a change at QB and go with the rookie Nick Foles. And no, I'm not hoping Vick gets yanked because the Cowboys play the Eagles next week...okay, I'm lying, I totally am. I hate the Eagles. Saints winners, Eagles losers.

5) Broncos (4-3) @ Bengals (3-4)
The Broncos are rolling (won 3 of their last 4) and the Bengals are reeling (loss 3 straight). Broncos winners, Bengals losers.

6) Dolphins (4-3) @ Colts (4-3)
Here's this week's "Way Harder To Pick Than It Should Be" game. Two rookie QBs, 2 teams that started off rough and have come on as of late, 2 teams they burned me last week, 2 teams who could improbably make the playoffs. I'm confused and I'm truly considering just flipping a coin to decide a winner.

Fuck it, I'm going with Miami because they beat the Jets and the Jets beat Indy. Dolphins winners, Colts losers.

7) Ravens (5-2) @ Browns (2-6)
The Browns are coming off their first 2 wins, and the Ravens are coming off of their bye. Can Cleveland keep it up? I say no, though Trent Richardson may rush for 200 yards. Ravens winners, Browns losers.

8) Vikings (5-3) @ Seahawks (4-4)
I'm not picking against Seattle at home, I'm just not. Seahawks winners, Vikings losers.

9) Bears (6-1) @ Titans (3-5)
Why o why do I have such a strong urge to pick the Titans in an upset here? I mean, I'm not gonna do it, but it's weird that I seriously thought about it, right? Bears winners, Titans losers.

10) Cardinals (4-4) @ Packers (5-3)
Poor Cardinals. Packers winners, Cardinals losers.

11) Bills (3-4) @ Texans (6-1)
The Bills' defense loves nothing more than to give up monster games and here comes another. Texans winners, Bills losers.

12) Buccaneers (3-4) @ Raiders (3-4)
The Bucs lost Carl Nicks and that's gonna hurt their running game tremendously. Unfortunately for Oakland, Tampa won't give up on their running game after their best back totals 5 carries like Kansas City. Buccaneers winners, Raiders losers.

13) Lions (3-4) @ Jaguars (1-6)
Are the Lions officially back? I'm not sure yet, but I definitely don't see a lose to Jacksonville in their future. Lions winners, Jaguars losers.

14) Chiefs (1-6) @ Chargers (3-4)
It's unfortunate the Knicks-Nets game got postponed due to the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy because I have no interest in watching this game, and I'm sure you don't either. Both of these teams are pathetic and there's about a 0.0000009% chance this game will be at all interesting if their performances last week were any indicator. Anyway, I'm still pissed at the Chiefs for only giving Jamal Charles 5 carries last week for what seems like no reason, so fuck them. Chargers winners, Chiefs losers.

This Week: 12-2 (.857)
Last Week: 9-5 (.643)
Season: 83-49 (.629)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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Jalen Rose Stole Patrick Ewing's TV

You gotta love Jalen Rose and the Grantland Network!

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Mystikal Monday Ep. 7

I pray that song Gudda and that other random nigga were rapping to isn't a feature on Mystikal's album. Gudda can't even get a feature on Lil Wayne's album, so we don't need one on Mystikal's.

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2 Chainz - Enunciation

Not sure why you would put a minute long commercial at the beginning of your video with as short as people's attention spans are these days, but I did like the video once it finally started. Be sure to check for Watch The Clone this Tuesday AFTER you vote (if you haven't already).

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Thursday Billboard Update - 11/1/12

Easily debuting at #1 with a whooping 1.208 million albums sold is Taylor Swift's Red. Not only is that enough to already be the 3rd highest selling album of 2012 behind only Adele's 21 (4.114 million) and One Direction's Up All Night (1.316 million), but it's also the most albums sold in a first week since Eminem's The Eminem Show (1.322 million) in 2002. Oh, and that's without the sneaky low pricing trick on Amazon like Lady Gaga (the lowest Red was sold for was $9.99). Dominance.

In other Billboard 200 news, Kendrick Lamar's good kid, m.A.A.d. city checks in at #2 with 241,000. I'm mad they didn't give Kendrick his own week because Taylor Swift's crazy numbers completely overshadowed what would normally be an incredible #1 debut.

For the 6th straight week Maroon 5's One More Night and Psy's Gangnam Style are #1 and #2 on the Hot 100. Leaping into the top 10 this week are Bruno Mars' Locked Out Of Heaven (15-7) and Chris Brown's Don't Wake Me Up (11-10).

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Taylor Swift - Red (1)
2. Kendrick Lamar - good kid, m.A.A.d. city (2)
3. Jason Aldean - Night Train (1-3)
4. Mumford & Sons - Babel (2-4)
5. Tony Bennett - Viva Duets (5)
6. Gary Clark Jr. - Blak & Blu (6)
7. Stone Sour - House Of Gold & Bone - Part 1 (7)
8. P!nk - The Truth About Love (6-8)
9. Lady Antebellum - On This Winter's Night (9)
10. Brandy - Two Eleven (3-10)

• The RZA's "Man With The Iron Fists" soundtrack debuts at #31 with 11,700 copies sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. fun. - Some Nights (3-3)
4. Ke$ha - Die Young (5-4)
5. Rihanna - Diamonds (8-5)
6. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (6-6)
7. Bruno Mars - Locked Out Of Heaven (15-7)
8. Alex Clare - Too Close (7-8)
9. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (9-9)
10. Chris Brown - Don't Wake Me Up (11-10)

• Flo Rida's I Cry hops 9 more spots 24-15. Can it make the leap into the top 10 next week?
• Alicia Keys' Girl On Fire featuring Nicki Minaj jumps 19 spots 47-28.
• Kendrick Lamar's Swimming Pools (Drank) soars 23 spots 55-32. I wonder how high his lead single would be if he went with a more radio-friendly song like Backseat Freestyle or Poetic Justice? Speaking of Poetic Justice, the Drake featured song debuts at #76.
• Taylor Swift's 22, I Almost Do, Everything Has Changed, All Too Well, Stay Stay Stay debut at #44, #65, #67, #80, and #91 respectively.
• Kendrick Lamar's m.A.A.d. city featuring MC Eiht debuts at #94.
• Meek Mill's Young & Gettin' It with Kirko Bangz debuts at #95.

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