Idiocracy 101: DeshawnRaw Deletes His Videos

So I'm chillin' trying to catch up on all the YouTube videos I've missed since I got this new job, make my way to DeshawnRaw's channel and see there's only 2 videos. Of course I'm like "What the fuck?!" and thinking YouTube is acting up, but then I come across this video with Deshawn actually deleting his videos. I don't know why he's doing this, but this is easily one of the dumbest things I've ever seen. You work hard, amass millions of views and hundreds of thousands of subscribers and then you delete it on some emotional shit? New niggas, boy I tell ya'.

As I told y'all some months back, he had been working with Chris Rock and Comedy Central on a new sketch comedy show, so maybe he feels like he's too big time for YouTube or whatever? I don't know, but I do know this, he is gonna regret this for the rest of his "career." It's not so much about YouTube or the views, it's about pissing off your fanbase. Makes no sense, but new niggas gotta learn the hard way, I guess.

I did a little research and came across this. Yep, somebody is gassing this nigga and got him thinking he's bigger than he is. Either that or he's on some hellified drugs. Either way, it's a wrap for him.

Damn, it's even worse than I thought. I'm actually starting to feel bad for him. Cocaine is a helluva drug.

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DMX's First Encounter With Google

This could quite possibly be the funniest shit on the internet right now (sorry Smokin' Jay Cutler). There shouldn't be a moment that passes in DMX's life when a camera isn't on him, he's the G.O.A.T. when it comes to unintentionally funny rappers. Damn, I miss his BET reality show so much.

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Idiocracy 101: Honey Badger, Tyrann Mathieu, Kicked Off LSU's Football Team

You're a surprise Heisman candidate last year, heading into your junior year at LSU, which is coming off a National Champion. One more solid season, and big bucks are staring you in the face as a top NFL draft pick. How do you celebrate your accomplishments?

Well, if you're Tyrann Mathieu, you violate both school and team rules and get kicked out the the football program. Yes, he fucked his money up, now he can't suit up. Smart! Oh well, Honey Badger don't give a shit.

Now while this is bad news for Tyrann (the only way he could play next year is if he transfers to a Division I-AA school, if he transfers to another Division I-A, he has to sit out a year), this is great news for NFL teams. He was probably going pro after this season anyway, but now teams won't have to spend a top 10 pick, or maybe not even a first-rounder, to get him. It'll be like Janoris Jenkins all over again.

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Chief Keef - I Don't Like (Remix) (feat. Pusha T, Kanye West, Big Sean, & Jadakiss)

For some odd reason Kanye West and his G.O.O.D. Music crew (plus Jadakiss) have decided to jump on shitty new rapper Chief Keef's shitty song I Don't Like. I can't lie, I really don't like that with all the good young artists out there, Kanye picked this scrub to help out, but let's go ahead and this remix a go.

Chief Keef - I Don't Like (Remix) (feat. Pusha T, Kanye West, Big Sean, & Jadakiss)

Yep, just as shitty as the original. Maybe 10% better, but still pretty trash. This nigga Chief Keef makes 2 Chainz sound like Biggie lyrically, he's that bad. I don't give a shit if he's only 16, dude is GARBAGE. Real nigga shit, is he any better than Lil B? Seriously, go listen to that nigga's verse again (if your ears can bare) and tell me he's that much better than Lil B. I'm so disappointed in Kanye. Helping out wack ass rappers, that's that shit I don't like.

Speaking of shit I don't like, did you hear the original producer, Young Chop, is pissed at Kanye because he remixed this struggle music? Go ahead and take a listen to what this extra moist ass fool had to say.

Sigh. Where do I even begin?

First off, how are you gonna sue someone for remixing your track for free? I hope he doesn't think garbage ass Chief Keef actually paid for this feature. (Then again, judging by the stupidity of the nigga I heard on the audio above, it's a possibility.) I'm sure Keef has made a few coins since this doo doo ass record popped up, but not enough to afford a verse from Kanye. Regardless, what is he gonna sue Kanye for? Enhancing his profile? Extending his 15 minutes of fame? Really, what? Besides, I seriously doubt it's against the law to remix a track this nigga probably made on Fruity Loops with a Lex Luger drum kit.

Second, did this idiot really just say Kanye better call his phone before he snaps? Nigga, who are you, and what exactly is you "snapping" gonna do? I'd like to know what Young Chop "snapping" entails, what is he gonna do, go hunt down Kanye and beat him up? He can't do shit but sue Kanye and eventually get his case thrown out, so yeah, snap away pal.

Lastly, why is the FUCK is the dude mad at Kanye, when essentially all he did was do he and Chief Keef a favor? The record was doing okay, but it's not like it was a huge smash hit. If anything, it was dying down and Keef was on a steady path to YC-dome until Kanye idiotically decided to breathe life into it with this remix. And this is how you re-pay him? You don't ride the wave, you go on Twitter and some little radio show and diss him? ONE OF THE BIGGEST RAPPERS IN THE WORLD JUST TWEAKED AND RAPPED OVER YOUR BEAT AND YOU'RE BITCHING ABOUT IT, PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THIS MAKES ANY FUCKING SENSE?!?!

People always wonder why some artists don't go back to where they're from and help others out once they blow up, but ungrateful ass bitch niggas like Young Chop are exactly why they don't. I swear niggas are just getting dumber and fucking dumber, and that's that shit I don't like. Sad.

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Some Nigga Named Riz Says DJ Khaled & Rick Ross Stole His Ideas

This negro can't be serious. Please tell me this negro isn't serious. Has the delusional rapper crown made its way to NYC? It looks like it to me. Whatever, just be sure to not name your album anything generic or this nigga no one's ever heard of will accuse you of biting. You've been warned.

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Crazed Fans Jump On Stage With DMX

Damn, first buddy got yoked up before he could get a good 2 feet on stage. I also love how "rolled up sleeves because I mean business" security guy threw the last dude off the side of the stage Uncle Phil-style. That shit was pretty darn ill if you ask me.

These crazy white kids are just lucky they ran on stage with calm 2012 DMX because if they would've happened to crazy 1999 DMX I have a feeling it would've went a little like this.

Anyway, remember when MGK and DMX were in the studio together awhile back, but here's the fruit of their labor (or whatever you can make out of it at least).

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Idiocrary 101: Sam Hurd Arrested Trying To Be Drug Kingpin

This nigga Sam Hurd has GOT to be one of the dumbest niggas alive. How are you gonna try to be an NFL player and a drug kingpin simultaneously? You can do one or the other, but both at the same time? Come on, nigga!

Well now Sam is probably about to do some football numbers (pun intended), and you know what? I really don't feel bad for the nigga at all. He's a fucking idiot and it's truly sad his wife and kid will have to suffer because of his retarded actions. Good job, Sam.

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Master P Vows To Take Over The Game For A 2nd Time

Uhhh, yeah, good luck with that P. I've got a better shot of catching Justin Bieber in Twitter followers than P has of being musically relevant again. On some real shit, P would have a better chance of trying to make a come back in shoes, clothing, and movies than he would in music.

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Raiders Trading 2 First-Round Pick... For Carson Palmer?!?!!

Wait a good gotdamn fucking minute here, All the Broncos could get for Brandon Lloyd was a 6th-round pick, and the Bengals were able to rob the Raiders of 2 first-rounders for Carson fucking Palmer? Andy Dalton is already better than Palmer (through 6 weeks he's already won as many games as Palmer did all last season), yet you give up not 1, but 2 first-round picks for him? Somebody tell me how that makes any sense. I mean, last time I checked, Jason Campbell broke his collarbone, he didn't die. He would be back eventually

And why even have Kyle Boller on your roster or draft Terrelle Pryor if the thought of one of them starting would make you fork over that much for a QB that hasn't been good in over half a decade? I guess Al Davis doesn't have to be alive for Oakland to make awful trades. Maybe they did this to honor Al in some fucked up way or as one last hooray? Who knows, I just can't make a bit of sense out of this.

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Lil B Says His Album Will Be Called I'm Gay

Not that Lil B was to be taken seriously before this, but at this point you should take Lil B about as serious as you should take me when I'm playing my character Young Real Nigga. I understand he's trying to get that Lady Gaga money, but this probably isn't the best way to go about it.

You know what? Maybe it's time for Lil B to get the MC Hammer "comedy legend" title? Nah, he hasn't put in enough work to be called a legend, so how about just comedian? Yeah, that's it! From this day forth Lil B will be known as "Comedian Lil B." Done and done.

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Idiocracy 101: Yung Berg Doesn't Care About Stolen Chains

Okay, so Yung Berg thinks him getting robbed for his chains isn't a big deal because he has more chains? Well, won't those chains just getting stolen as well?

Personally, I think those chains are fake as hell. For starters, they don't even look real, and on top of that, hie's too nonchalant about something that supposedly costs a lot of money. If those diamonds were real, those chains would be worth over $100,000 each. You telling him Yung Berg can afford to be losing $100,000-plus worth of jewelry every few weeks? I think not.

(Side note: Who told Berg it was okay for "Mr. Sex In The City" to be his nickname?)

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Yung L.A. Gets Duck Tattoo Covered Up

Remember a couple weeks ago when your boy Yung L.A. got a duck tatted on his face? Well I guess he realized how retarded that was and now he got it "covered" with a big L.A. tattoo. Awesome.

This guy is really struggling in his post-rap career life. I mean, how is he supposed to get a job now? Last time I checked, nobody with a face tat ever bagged my groceries or wrapped my cheeseburger. You know you're losing when you can't get a job at McDonald's, even if you wanted one. Hell, if he kept the duck, maybe he could've got in an Aflac Insurance commercial or something. Now? Nothing.

Now the only 2 questions left unanswered is: 1) Why is this nigga still making auto-tune records in 2011 and 2) why is that record label's logo a duck? If you have an answer to either, please don't hesitate to hit me up. Thank you.

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Ice Cream Mane: The Face Of Retardation In America

What. The. Fuck?

Wait, before we try to answer that million dollar question, please find a mental disability foundation and make a donation to it. $1, $2, $5, whatever you can give, please do.

Not in the giving mood?? Here, take a close-up look at the atrocity that is this man's face:

Just look at the retardation in his eyes, and the permanent symbol of his condition on his face. He has an ice cream cone, with blue ice cream scoops on it, red lightning bolts shooting out of it, and "Brrr" written across it...on his face! Forever! If that doesn't make you want to donate, I don't know what will.

Don't you feel sorry for Gucci Ice Cream Mane?? His life is clearly barreling out of control. This is like a fucked up, Hip-Hop version of what lead Mike Tyson to get a tattoo on his face, only instead of being at the top of his profession, Ice Cream is at the bottom. Speaking of the bottom, the only way this tattoo could've been more retarded is if the ice cream cone was upside down.

Where is this Mane's friends?? Where is this Mane's family?? As far as I'm concerned, this is a cry for help more so than evidence of his mental challenged-ness. I mean, we already knew he was retarded, but who knew he was crazy too? That's like a cherry on the top of a shitty life sundae, or in this case, ice cream cone.

Well, hopefully somebody gets this Mane some help. And also, hopefully that same person makes sure every studio in the state of Georgia gets a restraining order against him stating that he can't step within 50 feet of one or he'll be arrested. It'd only be right.

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Idiocrary 101: Facebook Is NOT Shutting Down!

Let me take this time out to tell you how fucking dumb you are if you actually believed the rumor Facebook was shutting down March 15th. Here's a little word to the unwise: multi-billion dollar businesses (i.e. Facebook) don't just shut down in the height of their popularity. And they especially don't shut down just because the CEO said he, "wants his old life back."

You know what happens to multi-billion dollar businesses when their CEO is ready to call it quits?? THEY FIND A NEW CEO! Then said CEO gets a nice sized package to make sure he and his family are financially straight forever and ever and ever. But they definitely don't board up the windows and say, "Hey, we had a good run while it lasted."

Seriously, if people would just take a few seconds to think about these retarded ass rumors, they wouldn't be so easily duped. I mean, it's not like Facebook is a one-man operation Mark Zuckerberg is still running out of his dorm room at Harvard. Facebook isn't just a social networking site that gets people fired from their job for being on it too much during business hours, it's a corporation. They have employees, they have stock holders, you don't just wake up and decide you want to take your ball and go home and all of those people disappear.

Besides, what happened when Bill Gates stepped down at Microsoft? Did the company shut down? Did the government come delete Windows off our computers and put us all on Linux? No, he was replaced, and the ball kept rolling. The same thing would happen with Facebook.

So, with all that being said, I just wanted to remind you of how much of an idiot you are if you believed the rumor Facebook was shutting down. You make this world a dumber, much worse place. You suck.

Sincerely, Fiyah

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Idiocrary 101: Protecting Your "Hood"

I hate to say it, but this does nothing for the Mel Gibson "packs of niggas" theory. Why did this even happen?? Because the slapper didn't want any new niggas in his "hood"?? If he doesn't like guys with pierced lips and skinny jeans and decided to slap him, then I guess that's okay, but he didn't want him in his "hood"?? Really??

Uhh, excuse me Mr. "Hood" Gatekeeper, but your "hood" doesn't look like much of a "hood" to me. Decent looking houses, manicured lawns, birds chirping, at the very least least this was a middle class suburb, so why can't he rap there??

Niggas. That's all I can say. Niggas.

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Idiocrary 101: 50 Cent Loses Weight For Movie Role

What in the fuck is wrong with 50 Cent?? Why would you do this to yourself?? Obviously I know its for the "Things Fall Apart" movie blah blah blah, but guess what?? 50 Cent is rich! It's not like he had to do this. Hell, he doesn't even have to rap anymore, let alone act, so why take it to this extreme??

Look, I understand rappers want to be actors, and that's all fine and dandy, but to take it this far is just idiotic. All the roles where he could play a character at his normal weight were taken?? And yeah, he wrote the screenplay, but still, c'mon son! Its not like he's about to win an Oscar or something. And what happens if/when the movie flops??

I don't know, I just don't get it. I must say I do applaud his dedication, but this is extreme and unhealthy (remember he lost a bunch of weight in 2008 as well and regained it). I mean the nigga looks like he's about to die any second in these pics.

(Side note: I hope 50 doesn't plan to manufacture anymore beefs if he does decide to record music again some day. He's never gonna live this down. Ever.)

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Idicrary 101: Niggas & Pointless Tats

I'm thinking about making "Niggas & Pointless Tats" a regular segment on the website, but I don't know, lets take it slow and see how this goes.

First up we have Washington Wizards' guard DeShawn Stevenson and the curious decision to get all the essentials to a $5 bill tattooed on his neck. Of course, it always dumb to get anything tatted on your neck, but this is in particularly dumb because has no meaning. I can all but guarantee you that if you asked DeShawn why he did this he probably couldn't even you a reasonable answer. Its just pointless and retarded.

He doesn't wear #5, he was the 23rd pick in the draft, he's from Fresno, CA area code 559, not 505, Lincoln was the 16th President, 5+5=10, not 2, no one over 12 (that is also not a crackhead) goes out of their way for $5. I can't for the life of me figure out what he was thinking by getting this shit. And if you're gonna do this, why not get a $100 bill?? Or how about a $2 bill since you do wear that number?? Hell, I don't know, maybe he just likes Subway?? There's gotta be something I'm missing... but mostly likely not. Check out a close up:

Aight lets move on to Birdman now who got the following tattoo to commemorate his girlfriend's boyfriend's birthday last week by getting "9-27-82" on his arm:

Two questions: 1) How gay is this?? 2) If you have so many tattoos that you have to overlap old tattoos to get new ones, isn't that a sign that you should stop getting tattoos??

I have nothing else to say about this gayness, lets go back to Deshawn:

I want you to focus on the pic on the right side. Yeah, the crack coming from the top of his forehead. Now, unlike the $5, he actually had a reason for this tattoo. Take it away Mr. Stevenson: "I don't crack. I feel like people always try to break me, but I don't crack. So, I put that there." Really?? If you DON'T crack, wouldn't it be smart to NOT put a crack on you?? Or how about even one of those "No Smoking" circles with the cross through it on top of the crack?? Nope, just the crack.

His explanation is like saying, "I don't like gay sex. I feel like people always try to have gay sex with me, but I don't do gay sex," and then going out and have sex with a dude. Just plain retarded. And that's not even mentioning what the tat would look like if his hairline ever started to recede! Could be tragic.

Okay, so how did you guys like "Niggas & Pointless Tats"?? Is it a keeper?? E-mail me, Tweet me, or just leave a comment.

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What The Hell Is Rick Ross Talking About??

Huh?? I don't even know what that means. Rappers man, rappers...

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Delonte West Arrested With 3 Guns In Maryland

That's right, THREE guns! A handgun in his pocket, another handgun in his pant leg, and a shotgun strapped to his back in a guitar case. ALL LOADED!

Where the FUCK was this nigga going?? Like seriously, all jokes aside, where was this nigga going?? The 9 and the Ruger, understandable (I guess), but the shotgun?? What was going on there?? And all while riding on a motorcycle!

This is categorically stupid so while LeBron and Shaq are trying to make a title run, Delonte will probably be in somebody's courtroom or maybe even behind bars. I mean, it could be a misunderstanding, but how farfetched does that sound at this point?? Wild shit.

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Idiocracy 101: Terrelle Pryor Should Just Not Talk

If this was slavery this dumb nigga would've got us all killed. He's not helping the Michael Vick cause at all. I don't know if you heard, but Ohio State starting QB Terrelle Pryor had "VICK" on his eyeblack during Saturday's barely won game. That wasn't the problem though, his explanation for it is. Take the stage Terrelle:

"I just feel he made his mistake, and I think he just needs more support," he said. "Not everybody is the perfect person in the world. Everyone does -- kills people, murders people, steals from you, steals from me. I just feel that people need to give him a chance." Via Jay-Mariotti.FanHouse.com

Damn, this man is one Pryor you don't want grabbing the mic. Everyone kills people and steals?? What the fuck?? I know dude is only 20, but fuck, how stupid can you be?? Nigga just go sit in the corner, you fuckin' it up for all of us right now.

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