BUS DRIVER UPPERCUT PARODY

These hoes be actin up and I be uppercuttin em!

CANCELLATION FEES

Check out the new video!

THE GAME REVEALS NEW ALBUM COVER

This nigga going to Hell like a muhfucka lol.

BILL SIMMONS AND JALEN ROSE JOIN NBA COUNTDOWN

I'm super excited about this.

DOWNLOAD THE REAL NIGGA SEXTAPE!

It's not to late to download Young Real Nigga's new classic!

October 31, 2012

Random News Shit: NBA Players Gettin' PAID Edition

1) James Harden Gets 5-Year/$80 Million Deal From Rockets
And if his performance last night (37 points, 12 assists, 6 rebounds, and 4 steals) is any indicator, he's worth every dime. How crazy would it be if Harden kept this up and started over Russell Westbrook in the All-Star game or challenged Kevin Durant for the scoring title? OKC fans would be sooooo pissed and it would be hilarious!

2) Warriors Give Stephen Curry 4-Year/$44 Million Deal
If you've followed me for awhile, you know I'm a big Steph Curry fan, so I'm happy to hear this, I just hope his ankle holds up and he doesn't become the modern day Grant Hill.

3) Jrue Holiday Gets $41 Million Extension From Pistons
Seems like a lot, but the kid can ball, so I'm good with it.

4) DeMar DeRozan Signs $40 Million Extension With Raptors
Hopefully some of that money is for him getting robbed in the 2011 Slam Dunk Contest. Hey, does this mean he's now richer than his college teammate Lil Romeo? I think it might.

5) Bulls & Taj Gibson Agree On $38 Million Extension
What a steal! Taj is clearly better than Carlos Boozer, and he got a max deal. Taj might've wanted to consider testing free agency.

6) Knicks-Nets Game Postponed
Damn, now I guess I gotta watch that dreadful Chiefs-Chargers game. Fuck!

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Grand Theft Auto V Coming Spring 2013

Meant to post this yesterday, but GTA V IS COMING OUT THIS SPRING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOURCE

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Cancellation Fees 2


Happy Halloween!

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October 28, 2012

OKC Trades James Harden To Houston

Wow, wow, WOW! I couldn't be any more shocked about this trade. I mean, if the Thunder were gonna trade James Harden, you'd figure it would've happened over the summer, not days before the start of the season. Crazy. Anyway, here's the trade breakdown:

Houston gets James Harden, Cole Aldrich, Daequan Cook, and Lazar Hayward; OKC gets Kevin Martin and Jeremy Lamb, two first-round picks and a second-round pick.

Initially the winner looks like Houston because they got the best player, but upon further review, the big winner is the Los Angeles Lakers. Now instead of having to go through OKC's Big 3, they now only have to go through OKC's Big 2.5. Hell, maybe even Big 2.25, so yeah, the Lakers are definitely the prime beneficiaries of this deal.

Do you know who the big loser is? The funniness of this picture. R.I.P.

SOURCE

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 8

Last week the Dallas Cowboys won, I won both of my fantasy games by at least 39 points, in one of those match-ups I won by more points (57) than my opponent score (56), and I went 11-2 on my NFL picks. I've peaked in the 2012 season, so it's all downhill from here.


1) Falcons (6-0) @ Eagles (3-3)
Andy Reid is 13-0 in games after the bye, but this will be the first time he and the Eagles have faced an undefeated team. Also, how many of those 13 games came against teams who were also coming off a bye? I'm guessing not many, if any. Besides, wouldn't it make sense for Andy Reid to finally lose one of these games in the season he gets fired after (or during)? Falcons winners, Eagles losers.

2) Giants (5-2) @ Cowboys (3-3)
Much like in Week 1, I have dueling stats for this divisional match-up. The Giants are 3-0 in the Cowboys' new billion dollar stadium and the Cowboys have never loss 4 straight home games to the Giants. Which one will win out? I don't know, but I'm leaning towards New York continuing its undefeated record in Cowboys Stadium for another year because something always seems to go wrong for the Dallas in these games (in 2009 Tony Romo threw for 127 yards, the least amount of yards he's ever thrown for in a full game in his career, and 3 interceptions, including one that miraculously bounced off Jason Witten's shoe and right into the hands of the defender; in 2010 Romo broke his collarbone in the first half and the Jon Kitna lead offense gave back the 13 point lead almost immediately; in 2011 the Cowboys somehow gave up a 12 point lead with 5:41 left to play, then after Romo led the team into field goal range for a chance to tie it, Tom Coughlin called a timeout on a Dan Bailey 47-yard make, and the 2nd attempt was blocked). Giants winners, Cowboys losers.

3) Redskins (3-4) @ Steelers (3-3)
I could definitely see this game going either way, but in the end, I like Washington's defense to let down again and ruin another fabulous performance by Robert Griffin III.


...Wait, I just saw the uniforms the Steelers will be wearing this week. I'm out on them now.Redskins winners, Steelers losers.

4) Saints (2-4) @ Broncos (3-3)
Is it just me or have the Broncos played in every nationally televised game this season? This feels like at least the 5th time I've mentioned Peyton Manning playing at night as a reason for me picking Denver. Is it because they made the schedule when Tim Tebow was the projected starter or is this all Manning? Inquiring minds want to know (but are too lazy to do 37 seconds worth of Googling to find out). Broncos winners, Saints losers.

5) 49ers (5-2) @ Cardinals (4-3)
Remember when the Cardinals were 4-0? Bad times. 49ers winners, Cardinals losers.

6) Dolphins (3-3) @ Jets (3-4)
On the podcast I said I was taking Miami, but after remembering what happened to the last rookie QB that visited the Jets of New York, I'm changing my pick. Jets winners, Dolphins losers.

7) Patriots (4-3) @ Rams (3-4)
Whatever homefield advantage the Rams had is out the window as this is the NFL's random and unnecessary annual London game. There's a chance Danny Amendola could play, but I still like the Patriots to go over to jolly ol' England and lay down some American wood. Patriots winners, Rams losers.

8) Seahawks (4-3) @ Lions (2-4)
I know Detroit looked terrible Monday night in Chicago, but I like them a lot in this game because Seattle is a different team on the road. Seattle is 1-3 on the road this year with their only win coming against the 1-5 Carolina Panthers. Also, I think the Lions will be pumped to be playing at home after starting the season by playing 4 of its 6 games on the road. Lions winners, Seahawks losers.

9) Panthers (1-5) @ Bears (5-1)
The Bears will win this game easily, but can we take out a moment to acknowledge Brandon Marshall dropping biblical science on First Take the other day? Move over Tim Tebow, there's a new worshiper in town and he goes by the name of Biblical Brandon Marshall! I'm all in on Biblical Brandon Marshall and I can't wait to see more of him. Will he be guest preaching at any churches before the game this Sunday? How about after? If anybody knows, pass that information along to me. Bears winners, Panthers losers.

10) Buccaneers (2-4) @ Vikings (5-2)
What has happened to Christian Ponder, wasn't he just good like 2 weeks ago? Now he's playing awfully and the Vikings have loss 2 of their last 3 games. I guess you can't blame it all on his, but I am doing so anyway because I'm bitter about starting the week off 0-1. Vikings winners, Buccaneers losers.

11) Colts (3-3) @ Titans (3-4)
Looks like Zombie Chris Johnson has risen from the grave just in time for Halloween. Awesome! I like ZCJ2K to keep things rolling against a Colts defense that made Shonn Greene look like Emmitt Smith the last time they were on the road. Titans winners, Colts losers.

12) Chargers (3-3) @ Browns (1-6)
The Browns could totally win this game, I'm not crazy, right? If Trent Richardson was healthy, I'd take the upset... but he's not. Chargers winners, Browns losers.

13) Jaguars (1-5) @ Packers (4-3)
I'll put it like this: Jacksonville couldn't beat Green Bay with Blaine Gabbert and Maurice Jones-Drew. Packers winners, Jaguars losers.

14) Raiders (2-4) @ Chiefs (1-5)
Want to know how bad the Raiders suck? They barely beat the Jaguars at home without MJD and Gabbert. Then again, last time they were on the road, they nearly beat the Falcons. I'm so confused. Chiefs winners, Raiders losers.

This Week: 9-5 (.643)
Last Week: 11-2 (.846)
Season: 71-47 (.602)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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October 26, 2012

Pinky Speaks On Potential Porno With Mystikal


Interesting. I pray it doesn't happen, but interesting.

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October 25, 2012

Thursday Billboard Update - 10/25/12

Brandy's new album Two Eleven debuts at #3 with 64,700. Also, Miguel's Kaleidoscope Dream (11-7) and Adele's 21 (15-9) return to the top 10.

Same ol', same ol' on top of the Hot 100, Maroon 5's One More Night is still #1 and Psy's Gangnam Style is still #2. Entering the top 10 is Rihanna's Diamonds (11-8) and Ne-Yo's Let Me Love You (12-9).

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Jason Aldean - Night Train (1)
2. Mumford & Sons - Babel (1-2)
3. Brandy - Two Eleven (3)
4. Scotty McCreery - Christmas With Scotty McCreery (4)
5. Jamey Johnson - Living For A Song: A Tribute To Hank Cochran (5)

6. P!nk - The Truth About Love (8-6)
7. Miguel - Kaleidoscope Dream (11-7)
8. Little Big Town - Tornado (14-8)
9. Adele - 21 (15-9)
10. Dethklok - Metalocalypse (10)
  • Bobby V's self-titled album debuts at #91 with 5,000 copies sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. fun. - Some Nights (4-3)
4. Taylor Swift -  We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (5-4)
5. Ke$ha - Die Young (8-5)
6. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (6-6)
7. Alex Clare - Too Close (7-7)
8. Rihanna - Diamonds (11-8)
9. Ne-Yo - Let Me Love You (12-9)

10. P!nk - Blow Me (One Last Kiss) (9-10)
  • Bruno Mars' Locked Out Of Heaven jumps 18 spots 33-15.
  • Flo Rida's I Cry leaps 27 more spots 51-24.
  • T.I.'s Ball featuring Lil Wayne debuts at #50.
  • Macklemore's Thrift Shop hops 14 spots 96-82.

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October 24, 2012

Shyne Calls Kendrick Lamar's Album 'Trash'

Remember when people couldn't wait for Shyne to get out of prison? Man, I wish we could have that one back. Anyway, let's see how Shyne put his yarmulke in his mouth today.

At first I was gonna bash Shyne in this post (and I hold out the right to bash him at a later date), but he's so clearly just a lonely ass nigga begging for attention that I'm gonna pass. No one (including Shyne) thinks good kid, m.A.A.d. city is trash, but everyone knows no one cares about Shyne.

Think about it, who's checking for Shyne right now? Is anybody you know hoping to hear more of this from a rapper that looks like this? Fuck no! A dead bee has more buzz than Shyne does right now, that's why he went after Rick Ross, Diddy, and Drake 2 weeks ago, and that's why he tweeted this bullshit tonight; he's lonely and badly needs attention. Why else would the creator of this lash out at an album everyone agrees is either classic or damn near it?

Now, I would tell you to go download Shyne's garbage ass Gangland mixtape so he doesn't kill himself because of loneliness and depression, but really, how bad of a thing would that be? Again, think about it.

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October 23, 2012

Sean Lee Out For The Season

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOURCE

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Jon Stewart Ethers Fox News On 'Not Optimal-Gate'

Ether.

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Affion Crockett's Watch The Clone Drops November 6th!


It's about damn time, but Watch The Clone will be out in 2 weeks on November 6th, so be sure to check that ho out!

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October 21, 2012

The Game Reveals Jesus Piece Album Cover

Remember when I posted that The Game was dropping a new album called Jesus Piece this winter? Well here's the uber blasphemous cover, which features "Jesus" rocking a Jesus piece, red bandana, and tattooed tear.

I don't know who The Game prays too, but this definitely isn't the same Jesus I pray to. My Jesus isn't a gang banger. And why is this black Jesus (the only thing accurate on this cover) wearing a white Jesus piece? Whatever, this cover is just screams "Hell's first round first pick," so I'm just gonna leave it alone...until the L.A.M.E. Awards, of course.

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Kendrick Lamar - The Heart Pt.3 (Will You Let It Die?)

Kendrick La-fucking-mar! How isn't this on the album? Man, man, man. Good kid, m.A.A.d. city in stores this Tuesday!!!!!!!!

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Bruno Mars' Whatta Man

I missed Bruno Mars hosting SNL tonight (and in all likelihood, so did you), but from everything I've heard he was great. In honor of the occasion, here's Bruno's recent FunnyOrDie video, which is a hilarious remake of Salt-n-Pepa's Whatta Man. Enjoy!

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Xzibit: Close Up Documentary


I was just watching this and figured I'd share it with you all. I had no idea his son passed away, that's crazy!

Anyway, cats seem to take Xzibit as a joke because of Pimp My Ride (for whatever reason), but you can't forget how ill Xzibit is. Man, when What U See Is What U Get dropped me and my cousin were going nuts! Of course the video is crazy, but that song is still dope till this day.

I'm on a Xzibit high right now, I'm gonna go listen to Napalm! ...Okay, I'm gonna go listen to good kid, m.A.A.d. city again, but after that, Napalm.

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Jalen Rose & Bill Simmons Announce Joining NBA Countdown


I actually found out about this on a sports blog earlier this week by happenstance and now that it's cemented, I really couldn't be more excited about it. We can only hope Jalen Rose brings the bat with him to the set.

Check out the entire B.S. Report this video is from here.

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Bar Refaeli's Sex Tape Kickstarter

A Kickstarter we'd all want to get behind. Man, if only this was real. Damn. Damn. Damn.

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October 20, 2012

NFL Winners & Losers: Week 7


1) Redskins (3-3) @ Giants (4-2)
The Redskins whipped the Giants twice last year with RG3-and-out (aka Rex Grossman) at the helm, so they're definitely beating them this year with Robert Griffin III, right? Wrong! It just makes too much sense for it to happen, so I'm going with the G-Men, who are fresh off of whipping the ass of the 49ers (although the Vikings also beat the 49ers and the Redskins beat the Vikings). Now I guess it’s time for me to prepare to be proven wrong by RGIII. Giants winners, Redskins losers.

2) Ravens (5-1) @ Texans (5-1)
The word is out now; you can officially run on the Baltimore Ravens' defense. Arian Foster's mouth must've been watering watching the highlights from last week's game where Felix Jones was gashing the Ravens like he was... someone other than Felix Jones. With that being said, I'm sure Joe Flacco and the Ravens offense was equally as thrilled as they watched game tape of a semi-struggling Aaron Rodgers bending over the Texans secondary a week ago.

So which defense will suck less? I'm going with Baltimore in the return of T-Sizzle waaaaaay too early for comfort. Ravens winners, Texans losers.

3) Jets (3-3) @ Patriots (3-3)
The first and last place Jets visit the also first and last place Patriots in a battle for first and last place in the AFC East. Nice!

Seriously though, the Pats are going to eviscerate the Jets Sunday. It won't even be close. Patriots winners, Jets losers.

4) Seahawks (4-2)* @ 49ers (4-2)
Home teams are 4-1 in Thursday night games this season and I like that trend to continue. 49ers winners, Seahawks losers.

5) Cardinals (4-2) @ Vikings (4-2)
Last week I gave all the reasons Arizona should lose then for some reason picked them to win. I won't be making that mistake 2 weeks in a row. Vikings winners, Cardinals losers.

6) Packers (3-3)* @ Rams (3-3)
The Rams are good, but judging by the spanking the Packers put on the Texans last Sunday night, they may be back for real. Packers winners, Rams losers.

7) Cowboys (2-3) @ Panthers (1-4)
It's almost eerie how closely the 2012 Dallas Cowboys are mirroring the 2011 Dallas Cowboys. In 2011 they were 2-2 heading into a Week 5 bye after a disappointing home loss (collapse against Detroit). Same thing in 2012 (collapse against Chicago). After the bye in 2011, they played an 4-1 AFC contender (the Patriots) closely on the road in Week 6 and loss in the end. Same thing in 2012 (this time against the Ravens). In that Week 6 loss in 2011, our starting running back got hurt (Felix Jones) and missed Week 7. Same thing in 2012 (DeMarco Murray will miss Week 7 with a sprained foot). In Week 7 of 2011, we played a inferior team NFC team will a horrible run defense (St. Louis). Same thing in 2012 (Carolina). The only thing left to be determined is which NFC East team eliminates them in Week 17 this year. Cowboys winners, Panthers losers.

8) Steelers (2-3) @ Bengals (3-3)
Every year there's at least one team that gets devastated by injuries and this year that team is the Steelers. Fortunately for them, the Browns exposed the Bengals last week for their first win. The way I see it is if a half-NFL team like the Browns can beat the Bengals then half of an NFL team can beat the Bengals. Steelers winners, Bengals losers.

9) Lions (2-3) @ Bears (4-1)
The only thing that's stopping me from saying this is gonna be a curb stomping beat down is the fact that they're division rivals. Either way, Chicago should win. Bears winners, Lions losers.

10) Saints (1-4) @ Buccaneers (2-3)
The Bucs dominated the Chiefs and the Chiefs beat the Saints, so that means the Bucs will beat the Saints, right? Wrong! Yes, they will put points up on the Saints' garbage defense, but Drew Brees obviously won't be as easy to stop as Brady Quinn. Saints winners, Buccaneers losers.

11) Titans (2-4) @ Bills (3-3)
Tennessee should've saved its Music City Miracle reply of Week 3 for this game, how great would that have been? Either way, Matt Ryan is on bye, so I need a big game out of Ryan Fitzpatrick for my 2nd fantasy league. Go first and last place Bills! Bills winners, Titans losers.

12) Browns (1-5) @ Colts (2-3)
The Colts were one of the bigger disappoints of Week 6, but I like them to bounce back this week. Colts winners, Browns losers.

13) Jaguars (1-4) @ Raiders (1-4)
I can't decide if I was more impressed with the Raiders for nearly beating the Falcons or more disappointed that the Falcons nearly loss to the Raiders. Either way, if the Raiders can fight like they did last week, there's no reason they can't take out the Jags. Raiders winners, Jaguars losers.

This Week: 11-2 (.846)
Last Week: 6-8 (.643)
Season: 62-42 (.596)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

Continue»

October 18, 2012

Thursday Billboard Update - 10/18/12

Shockingly debuting at #2 is Macklemore & Ryan Lewis' The Heist with 78,500 copies sold. Amazing, especially considering they are independent. Good job by them. Coming in at #4 is Machine Gun Kelly's debut album Lace Up with 50,700 copies sold. That's about what I expected, but a tad embarrassing considering an independent artist sold more. Then again, he didn't get much push from Bad Boy outside of a few tweets from Diddy.

Maroon 5 denies Psy again! I guess people really don't want to see Psy performed Gangnam Style topless like he said he would if the song went #1.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Mumford & Sons - Babel (1-1)
2. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis - The Heist (2)
3. KISS - Monster (3)
4. Machine Gun Kelly - Lace Up (4)
5. Coheed & Cambria - Afterman: Ascension (5)
6. All Time Low - Don't Panic (6)
7. Barbra Streisand - Release Me (7)

8. P!nk - The Truth About Love (4-8)
9. Ellie Goulding - Halcyon (9)
10. Muse - The 2nd Law (2-10)
  • Xzibit's Napalm debuts at #149 with 3,200 copies sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. Taylor Swift - I Knew You Were Trouble (3)
4. fun. - Some Nights (4-4)
5. Taylor Swift -  We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (5-5)
6. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (7-6)
7. Alex Clare - Too Close (10-7)
8. Ke$ha - Die Young (14-8)
9. P!nk - Blow Me (One Last Kiss) (9-9)
10. Carly Rae Jepsen - Good Time (11-10)
  • Rihanna's Diamonds moves 7 spots to the outskirts of the top 10, 18-11.
  • Flo Rida's I Cry hops 18 more spots 69-51 in its 3rd week.
  • As Kendrick Lamar's album leaks online, his Swimming Pools (Drank) jumps 10 spot 71-61.
  • DJ Drama's My Moment featuring 2 Chainz, Meek Mill and Jeremih slides 10 spots 99-89 in its 2nd week.

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October 15, 2012

Bus Driver Uppercuts Teen Girl (Meek Mill "Actin' Up" Parody)

My latest offering.

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October 14, 2012

NFL Winners & Losers: Week 6


1) Giants (3-2) @ 49ers (4-1)
How are the Giants trying to play the "Nobody Believes In Us" card heading into the 6th week of the season after they won the Super Bowl? Fuck outta here with that bullshit Tom Coughlin!

With that being said, the 49ers should be the reigning Super Bowl champs, I'm still not sure how they managed to lose that NFC Championship game (or how Kyle Williams remained employed after single-handedly losing it for them), but they are better than the Giants. Besides that, they have not one, but two former G-Men (Mario Manningham and Brandon Jacobs' corpse) to tell their already dominate defense everything they need to know about New York's offense. Niners winners, Giants losers.

2) Cowboys (2-2) @ Ravens (4-1)
Can Dallas win this game? Of course. Will Dallas win this game? Now that's a different story. Besides, Baltimore is undefeated against Dallas all-time (yes, its only been 2 games, but still...) and haven't lost a home game since December of 2010 (13 straight wins, longest streak in the NFL). Ravens winners, Cowboys losers.

3) Packers (2-3)* @ Texans (5-0)
This is where  the undefeated fairy tale comes to an end for the Texans...but if it doesn't, I'll officially be ready to rule Green Bay out of playoff contention, the NFC is too deep. It's a shame they don't have just one more win. Oh well, right Roger Goodell? Packers winners, Texans losers.

4) Patriots (3-2) @ Seahawks (3-2)*
You can never underestimate Seattle playing in games at home because of their 12th man, but as long as the Pats can put up 20+ points, there's no way they can lose this week (especially since their 13th man, the replacement refs, are gone). Of course that Seahawks D will make it tough, but again, if they can get at least 20, they'll be fine because Seattle's offense is trash. I guess that's what happens when you let the guy who sings Chocolate Rain start at quarterback for your team. Patriots winners, Seahawks losers.

5) Broncos (2-3) @ Chargers (3-2)
All I have to say about this game is Peyon Manning at night. Yeah, he was pretty much terrible in his last night game, but c'mon, Peyton Manning at night! How can you go against it? Broncos winners, Chargers losers.

6) Vikings (4-1) @ Redskins (2-3)
Is RG3 playing in this game? If so, he shouldn't be. With either Kirk Cousins or RG3-and-out (Rex Grossman) starting, I definitely have Minnesota winners. Vikings winners, Redskins losers.

7) Rams (3-2) @ Dolphins (2-3)
This game was tougher to pick than I had originally expected, but instead of boring you to death talking about 2 uninteresting teams, I'm just gonna tell you I went with the home team. Dolphins winners, Rams losers.

8) Colts (2-2) @ Jets (2-3)
Yes, the Colts were impressive coming back from a double-digit deficit against the Packers, but they were still down by double-digits, riding an emotional wave, and playing at home. The good news for them is that as long as they can score at least 14, the Jets can't win. Colts winners, Packers losers.

9) Lions (1-3) @ Eagles (3-2)
Both of these teams are frauds, but at least the Eagles have found ways to win this year, unlike the Lions. Eagles winners, Lions losers.

10) Bills (2-3) @ Cardinals (4-1)
Arizona has an awful offensive line, back ups starting at running back to replace their 2 garbage injured running backs, and Kevin Kolb at quarterback. Then again, Buffalo is Buffalo. Cardinals winners, Bills losers.

11) Raiders (1-3) @ Falcons (5-0)
Please! Falcons winners, Raiders losers.

12) Steelers (2-2) @ Titans (1-4)
Just like everybody else in America, I picked the Steelers to win Thursday before getting the word that 40% of their team wouldn't finish the game. Bad times. Steelers winners, Titans losers.

13) Bengals (3-2) @ Browns (0-5)
Believe it or not, but the Browns actually hung with the Bengals when they played in Cincinnati in Week 2. With that being said, I'm sure they will disappoint yet again. Bengals winners, Browns losers.

14) Chiefs (1-4) @ Buccaneers (1-3)
If the fans in KC thought they hated Matt Cassel, just wait until they get a Sunday full of Brady Quinn under their belts. Besides, how could I pick against Greg Schiano's patented "Try To Take Out An Offensive Lineman's Knees By Attempting To Cause A Fumble (That Will Never Happen) On A Kneel Down" strategy? Buccaneers winners, Chiefs losers

This Week: 6-8 (.429)
Last Week: 9-5 (.643)
Season: 51-40 (.560)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

Continue»

October 11, 2012

Thursday Billboard Update - 10/11/12

Debuting at #3 this week is Miguel's Kaleidoscope Dream with 71,000 albums sold.

Over in the Hot 100, One Direction (3), Taylor Swift (6), and Adele (8) all had new singles debut in the top 10.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Mumford & Sons - Babel (1-1)
2. Muse - The 2nd Law (2)
3. Miguel - Kaleidoscope Dream (3)
4. P!nk - The Truth About Love (4-4)
5. Three Days Grace - Transit Of Venus (5)
6. Diana Krall - Glad Rag Doll (6)
7. Jackie Evancho - Songs From The Silver Screen (7)

8. Little Big Town - Tornado (9-8)
9. Cher Lloyd - Sticks & Stones (9)
10. Van Morrison - Born To Sing: No Plan B (10)

  • DJ Drama's Quality Street Music debuts at #15 with 23,800 copies sold.
  • Z-Ro's Angel Dust debuts at #120 with 3,700 albums sold.
  • Skyzoo's Dream Deferred debuts at #191 with 2,600 copies sold.

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. One Direction - Live While We're Young (3)
4. fun. - Some Nights (3-4)
5. Taylor Swift -  We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (4-5)
6. Taylor Swift - Red (6)
7. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (6-7)
8. Adele - Skyfall (8)
9. P!nk - Blow Me (One Last Kiss) (5-9)
10. Alex Clare - Too Close (9-10)
  • Bruno Mars' Locked Out Of Heaven debuts at #34.
  • Flo Rida's I Cry hops 12 spots 81-69 in its 2nd week.
  • DJ Drama's My Moment featuring 2 Chainz, Meek Mill and Jeremih debuts at #99.

Continue»

October 10, 2012

Cancellation Fees

I didn't put out any videos in September, but here's one of 2 this month. Enjoy!

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Slaughterhouse Shady Cypher 2012

This was a pretty cool video I came across today, check it out.

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October 07, 2012

NFL Winners & Losers: Week 5


1) Broncos (2-2) @ Patriots (2-2)
It'll be fun to see Peyton Manning vs. Tom Brady again, but judging by what New England was able to do to Denver's pseudo good defense last season, this game won't be close. Patriots winners, Broncos losers.

2) Eagles (3-1) @ Steelers (1-2)
The Steelers could just not be good this year, but I'd like to see them in this game, coming off the bye, with Troy Polamalu, James Harrison, and Rashard Mendenhall back before determining that. Steelers winners, Eagles losers.

3) Falcons (4-0) @ Redskins (2-2)
Carolina should've beaten Atlanta last week, and Washington actually will this week. Redskins winners, Falcons losers.

4) Packers (2-2)* @ Colts (1-2)
The Colts are gonna to score at least 30 to keep up and I don't think they're capable. Packers winners, Colts losers.

5) Bills (2-2) @ 49ers (3-1)
San Fran won't hang 52 on them like New England did, but this game won't be close regardless. 49ers winners, Bills losers.

6) Texans (4-0) @ Jets (2-2)
The Jets can't score, so once the Texans get in the end zone, this game is over. Texans winners, Jets losers.

7) Chargers (3-1) @ Saints (0-4)
Sean Payton will be in the building to see Drew Brees break Johnny Unitas' consecutive games with a touchdown pass record, and though he won't be calling plays, I think New Orleans will get win #1. Saints winners, Chargers losers.

8) Cardinals (4-0) @ Rams (2-2)
I originally had the Rams in this game before stupidly changing the pick Thursday after I found out they hadn't beaten the Cardinals at home since 2004. Oh, and Bill Simmons decision to pick the Rams didn't help. Cardinals winners, Rams losers.

9) Seahawks (2-2)* @ Panthers (1-3)
Russell Wilson isn't good. Panthers winners, Seahawks losers.

10) Ravens (3-1) @ Chiefs (1-3)
The Ravens will dominate and the Chiefs will score a couple garbage time touchdowns to make the score look closer than it actually is. Ravens winners, Chiefs losers.

11) Bears (3-1) @ Jaguars (1-3)
If Bears fans were able to fill up Cowboys stadium, there's a real possibility they could have more fans at this game than the Jags. Bears winners, Jags losers.

12) Dolphins (1-3) @ Bengals (3-1)
What's going on with BenJarvus Green-Ellis? This guy never fumbled once in his career and has fumbled 3 times in the past 2 weeks, including once at the goal line. Thankfully it hasn't stopped them from winner, but it's a potentially deadly trend.

As far as the Dolphins go, they seem to always find a way to lose, and I'm sure they will again this week. Bengals winners, Dolphins losers.

13) Titans (1-3) @ Vikings (3-1)
Tennessee will remain with one fluke win after this game is over. Vikings winners, Titans losers.

14) Browns (0-4) @ Giants (2-2)

There's no reason the Giants shouldn't win this game. Giants winners, Browns losers.
This Week: 9-5 (.643)
Last Week: 13-2 (.867)
Season: 45-32 (.584)*

*Due to the Inaccurate Reception, these win/lose totals are fucked for the season.

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October 05, 2012

Nike Introduces The LeBron X


Good stuff...but what will he wear at home? I guess you can't rule out the Heat changing their colors to that of blue flames for LeBron, but I doubt it. Weird.

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October 04, 2012

Thursday Billboard Update - 10/4/12

Lupe Fiasco's Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album Pt. 1 debuts at #5 with 89,000 copies sold.

Not too much going on in the Hot 100 this week, we'll see if Gangnam Style can takeover the #1 spot next week.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Mumford & Sons - Babel (1)
2. Green Day - ¡Uno! (2)
3. No Doubt - Push & Shove (3)
4. P!nk - The Truth About Love (1-4)
5. Lupe Fiasco - Food & Liquor II: The Great American Rap Album Pt. 1 (5)
6. deadmau5 - album title goes here (6)
7. G.O.O.D. Music - Cruel Summer (2-7)
8. Dave Matthews Band - Away From The World (4-8)
9. Little Big Town - Tornado (5-9)
10. The Killers - Battle Born (3-10)

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Maroon 5 - One More Night (1-1)
2. Psy - Gangnam Style (2-2)
3. fun. - Some Nights (3-3)
4. Taylor Swift -  We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together (4-4)
5. P!nk - Blow Me (One Last Kiss) (5-5)
6. Justin Bieber - As Long As You Love Me (7-6)
7. Taylor Swift - Begin Again (7)
8. Flo Rida - Whistle (6-8)
9. Alex Clare - Too Close (9-9)
10. Owl City & Carly Raw Jepsen - Good Time (8-10)
  • Rihanna's Diamonds debuts at #16.
  • Kendrick Lamar's Swimming Pools (Drank) hops 9 spots 81-72.
  • Trey Songz's uber corny Dive In also hops 9 spots 86-77.
  • Flo Rida's I Cry debuts at #81.
  • Usher's Numb jumps 15 spots 97-82 in its 2nd week.
  • Pitbull's Don't Stop The Party debuts at #89.

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OhGinelle - Fiyah Video

Oh, Ginelle, let us stop beating around the bush and acting like this song wasn't written specifically for me (So what if the lyrics are written from a girl's point of view, all true narcissists know the only part of a song that truly matters is the part that possibly mentions them). We can pretend like you were in this video wandering around Fort Lauderdale looking for your concert, but we all know you were looking for me so you could hand deliver my new theme music. It was a kind gesture indeed, so I guess what I'm trying to say is, thank you.

(Side note: Seriously, why wasn't I in this video? I could've been Looking Down At My Cell Phone While Walking Guy. I could've been Holding My Lady's Hand While Hoping She Doesn't Leave Me Because I Have No Transportation Guy. Hell, I even could've been Hand You Your Keytar Right Before You Hit The Stage Guy, and that guy didn't even exist in the video.

I don't know, I'm just so disappointed by the lack of me in the video for what is clearly my theme song. And to think, I was just getting over not being cast as Horny Dude With Cell Phone At Pump #1 Guy in the Tight Up Skirt video.)

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Miguel Cabrera Wins First Triple Crown Since 1967

I'm not going to pretend like I'm a huge baseball fan, but I would be remiss to not acknowledge what Miguel Cabrera did last night. Last night, Cabrera became the first person since 1967, and 10th person ever (the Triple Crown has been won 12 times, Ted Williams and Rogers Hornsby won it twice), to win the Triple Crown, finishing with 44 homeruns, 139 runs batted in, and a .330 batting average. Good thing the Marlins didn't keep him around.

Last thing, if you don't think Miguel Cabrera should win MVP over Mike Trot after winning the first Triple Crown in 45 years, please go drink bleach.

SOURCE

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Felonyland

Gotdamn, why doesn't Felonyland exist already?! I love Felonyland! Seriously, it should at least be under construction, starting immediately after this episode of the B.S. Report posted. Felonyland is one of the great ideas in America history, right up there with the internet and Chick-fil-A sandwiches. Someone make this happen!

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Mitt Romney Style

There is no way I would ever vote for Mitt Romney, but I came the closest I've ever been to changing that after this video because I loved it! Romney himself would've had to be in the video for me to really change my vote, but this is still pure greatness.

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Lace Up: The Documentary Trailer


Look interesting, I'm definitely gonna check it out. MGK's debut album Lace Up drops this Tuesday October 9th!

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October 02, 2012

Nas - Cherry Wine (feat. Amy Winehouse) Video

First off, if I was at the bar, I definitely would've stopped Nas and said, "Hey, less rapping, more pouring!" I think he made a total of 2 drinks in the entirety of this video.

Another thing, should the fine ass main girl in this video really be commending for not cheating while in her man's presence at his job? I say no. Let's see how she does with the male models straight out of central casting at another bar before we say she's the One.

...Unless by the line "just like me" he means a potential adulterer.

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October 01, 2012

MGK Kicked Out Of Microsoft Store For Performing On Table With Laptops

LMAO! You gotta love MGK! Here's the part I don't understand though: Why would you have someone perform in your store and not have a stage set up? They were practically begging for this.

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Seth MacFarlane To Host The Oscars

Wow, this is great news! Hopefully he walks up to the right microphone when he comes out to do his monologue.

The 85th Academy Awards will take place February 24th on ABC.

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