2011 NBA Slam Dunk Contest Contestants Announced

Here's the line-up for the Dunk Contest taking place in L.A. on February 19th: Blake Griffin, Brandon Jennings, Serge Ibaka, and JaVale McGee... or as it reads to the majority of fans: Blake Griffin, Blake Griffin, Blake Griffin, and Blake Griffin.

There's no doubt about it, this is definitely the Blake Griffin show, and obviously the NBA wants him to win with this group they put up against him. I wish LeBron James would've finally threw his hat in the ring, but with the shit Blake has been doing this year, I'm not too surprised he didn't. Oh well, I just can't wait to root against Brandon Jennings. Sorry B, but I can't root for anybody fucking my baby Teyana Taylor.

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INN: O.J. Mayo & Tony Allen Fight On Team Flight

Today in Ignant Nigga News, Memphis Grizzlies' swing players (pun intended) O.J. Mayo and Tony Allen had an on-flight fight Monday. Apparently the 2 were playing cards (Bill Simmons is right, all of these NBA fights and feuds are over either card games or women), O.J. loss, Tony asked for his money, O.J. said fuck that, Tony said aight, O.J. kept talking shit, and Tony proceeded to swell up O.J.'s face.

The card game they were playing?? Boo-Ray. Sound familiar? Well it should, Boo-Ray is the same game Gilbert Arenas and Javaris Crittenton were playing that lead to the infamous guns in the locker room scandal last year.

(Side note: Am I the only one surprised O.J. Mayo and Tony Allen weren't T'd up for this?? David Stern already outlawed his players from showing emotion, so I don't see why this should be any different just because it happened in the sky. I mean, what will corporate sponsors and fans think of the league if players show signs of life?? Assess the tech, the $35,000 fine, and let's move on with our (hopefully) emotionless lives.)

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Homeless Man With A Golden Radio Voice

I saw this video yesterday on WorldStar...then last night I accidentally clicked on MSN.com, and guess whose face I saw on the home page. That's right, Ted Williams, the homeless man with the golden radio voice. And guess what?? He got a job in radio! (Go Ted!) Yep, the Cleveland Cavaliers offered good ol' Ted a full-time job AND a house. I hate the Cavs, but they deserve a pat on the back for this. I'll even keep my fingers crossed and hope he doesn't eventually leave the organization for a sweeter job with better perks in Miami.

(Side note: I wonder what Ted Williams' voice sounded like when he was 14?? Do you think he and that radio radio announcer he met on that field trip had a conversation in their creepy golden voices?? Hmmm, that'd be awesome to hear if they did. Might have to add that to the bucket list.)

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Eli Porter Disses 50 Tyson

Your boy Eli Porter (aka "Da Best Mayne") is back on the internets, but this time instead of freestyle battling, he's calling out the newest handicap hip-hopper, 50 Tyson. That's right, the pride of Twin Cities, Minnesota has been called out by fellow retard rapper Eli Porter. Apparently Eli feels slighted by 50 because he has a deal and is experiencing minor success, and he's a struggling mental MC, so he decided to make a diss record. Awesome.

No word on if 50 Tyson will respond, but if he does, you already know who's gonna be all over it. Regardless, this beef is the retard equivalent of Lil Kim vs. Nicki Minaj, and already an early favorite for "Lamest Beef" on the 2011 L.A.M.E. Awards. This year is gonna be great, I can feel it!

More Eli Porter after the jump!

Gotdamn.

If you're wondering what he's talking about when he says the Mistah FAB interview, he's talking about this.

(Side note: Damn, this nigga's skin is terrible!)

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The 2010 L.A.M.E. Awards

It's been a long time coming, but it's finally here, the 2010 L.A.M.E. Awards! I wasn't able to do the video like I had hoped, but I was able to get the podcast done, so without further ado, the L.A.M.E. Awards for the year 2010!

(Side note: Don't worry, I wake up fully a few awards in.)

The L.A.M.E. Awards (Alt. Link)

Oh, and don't worry if you can't download or stream the audio, I have a list of all the winners below.

Lamest Sports Story
-The Reggie Bush Heisman scandal.
-The Cam Newton pay for play scandal.
-Everything involving LeBron James post-Decision.
-Any and everything involving Brett Favre.
-The Tiger Woods scandal aftermath.

WINNER: Any and everything involving Brett Favre.

Lamest Movie
-Vampires Suck (Trailer)
-Saw 3D (Trailer)
-The Switch (Trailer)
-Furry Vengeance (Trailer)
-Piranha 3D (Trailer)

WINNER: Vampires Suck

Lamest Trend
-Fox tails
-Lace front wigs
-Four Lokos
-Wooden Jesus pieces
-The Shake Weight

WINNER: Four Lokos

Lamest Celebrity Tweeter
-Lil Wayne (@liltunechi)
-Diddy (@iamdiddy)
-Rev. Run (@RevRunWisdom)
-Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian)
-Terrell Owens (@TerrellOwens)

WINNER: Lil Wayne

Lamest Miscellaneous Tweeter
-"Put 'team' in front of everything" person
-"TeamFollowBack" person
-"Retweet to reply" person
-"Announce who you're following/unfollowing" person
-"Tweet celebrities and though they never reply" person

WINNER: "TeamFollowBack" person

Lamest Miscellaneous Person
-"Put # signs in front everything whether it's on Twitter or not" person.
-"Free [insert jailed rapper]" person.
-Internet gangsta
-Local rapper spammer
-Ugly chick with an attitude

WINNER: Internet gangsta

Lamest Hair (Female)
-Rihanna
-Chrisette Michele
-Amber Rose
-Cassie
-Kalenna of Dirty Money

WINNER: Rihanna

Lamest Hair (Male)
-Bishop Eddie Long
-Andrei Kirilenko
-Justin Bieber
-Nokio
-Anybody with a mohawk still

WINNER: Bishop Eddie Long

Lamest New Artist
-Roscoe Dash
-Cali Swag District
-Waka Flocka
-Lil B
-YG

WINNER: Lil B

Lamest Title for an Album or Mixtape
-"Flockaveli" by Waka Flocka
-"The Laxative" by Mack Maine
-"Cocaine Waitress" by Diamond
-"Indrupence Day" by Dru Hill
-"Burrrprint 2" by Gucci Mane

WINNER: "The Laxative" by Mack Maine

Lamest Artwork for an Album or Mixtape
-Sheek - Donnie G
-Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
-Young Jeezy - Trap Or Die II
-Plies - You Need People Like Me 2
-Waka Flocka - Flockaveli

WINNER: Tie: Plies' You Need People Like Me 2 & Waka Flocka - Flockaveli

Lamest Beef
-Brian Pumper vs. Fabolous
-Soulja Boy vs. Fabolous
-MC Hammer vs. Jay-Z
-Lil Kim vs. Nicki Minaj
-Raz B vs. Chris Brown

WINNER: Raz B vs. Chris Brown

Lamest Song
-"Pretty Boy Swag" by Soulja Boy
-"Teach Me How To Dougie" by Cali Swag District
-"Rob Myself" by Plies
-"Hope She Cheats On You With A Basketball Player" by Marsha Ambrosius
-"Everything he's dropped since getting out of prison" by Shyne

WINNER: "Pretty Boy Swag" by Soulja Boy

Lamest Rapper
-Soulja Boy
-Waka Flocka
-T.I.
-The Game
-Shyne

WINNER: Soulja Boy

Lame Of The Year
-Soulja Boy
-Kat Stacks
-Montana Fishburne
-Brian Pumper
-Raz B
-Fantasia
-Bishop Eddie Long

WINNER: Soulja Boy

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Smiley - American Poster Boy Commercial

Smiley's American Poster Boy EP hits digital stores today (you can go cop it at Amazon right now!) and actual stores January 15th. If you fuck with me, fuck with my homie Smiley. Besides, I made the cover, so put a little money in my pocket too lol.

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Josh Groban Sings Kanye West Tweets

You gotta love those Yeezy tweets!

And that wasn't the only hilarious segment from Jimmy Kimmel Live last night, check out the farewell to Governor Schwarzenegger after the jump.

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Wade & James Co-Players Of The Month; Spoelstra Coach Of The Month

Can't decide who's playing better basketball right now between LeBron James and Dwyane Wade? Well neither can the NBA, because both were selected Eastern Conference Player Of The Month for December. LeBron averaged 25.2 ppg, 7.9 rpg and 6.8 apg, and D-Wade averaged 27.9 ppg, 6.9 rpg and 4.1 apg last month while leading the Heat to a 15-1 record for the month. They also became the first team in NBA history to go 10-0 on the road in a single month.

Boy, I don't think these guys will better learn to play together.

On the coach side of things, what a difference a month makes. In November, everyone (who disagreed with LeBron's decision) thought Erik Spoelstra should be fired, and now he's the Eastern Conference Coach Of The Month.

If only he could figure out what to do with all this talent.

Anyway, I haven't forgotten about the West Coast, Kevin Durant won Western Conference Player Of The Month by averaging 29.4 ppg, shooting 52% from the field, and 41% three while leading the Thunder to an 11-5 mark for the month. The Spurs' Gregg Popovich was named Western Conference Player Of The Month with his squad going 13-2 in the month.

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5 Things I Learned From Watching "Black Swan"

First and foremost, I want to commend the creators of "Black Swan" for naming it "Black Swan" and not "The Black Swan." Throwing "The" in front of random words and making it the title of your movie/album/TV show is just so fucked out. Let's leave that in 2010.

Okay, now that I got that out of the way, let the countdown begin!

5) Watching women masturbate is fun.
Okay, okay, I didn't learn this from "Black Swan," (shocker) watching women masturbate has been fun long before I was even born (double shocker). But still, I love it, and I love to see it.

Oh, and no, I'm not willing to be convinced that Natalie Portman wasn't really finger banging in her bed in that one scene. I don't care if she's an extraordinary actress, it's still real to me dammit!

4) Girl-on-girl scenes are never a bad thing.
Tell me the last uninteresting girl-on-girl scene you watch. Don't worry, I'll wait.

Can't do it, can you? I know. I know.

3) You don't have to do drugs to hallucinate, you just need to join the ballet.
Wanna get high, but don't wanna buy drugs? Join the ballet. It gives you all the frightening hard drug hallucinations without all that "I'm willing to suck a dick for more of this" hard drug stigma.

Plus, it's less of a burden on your pockets. Hell, it could actually make you money at some point. That's what us in the know call a "win, win, win."

2) Masturbating and having someone grab your crotch brings out the best in you.
It worked for Nina Sayers (no relation to Chicago Bears great Gale Sayers), I don't see why it couldn't work for every other hot, young chick with a job. Through years of research, I've found that women that masturbate are generally better at their jobs than women who don't. (And yes, by "years of research" I meant "minutes of sitting back and thinking if I were a chick, would I be a better worker if I masturbated" and that answer is yes.)

1) I don't want my daughter to be a ballerina.
Remember when you were little and your teacher asked everyone in class what they wanted to be when they grew up? There were always a bunch of cliché boy jobs like firefighter, policeman, and pornstar (Oh, that must've just been me), and cliché girl jobs like veterinarian, singer, and ballerina. Well after watching "Black Swan," my new goal in life is to keep my unborn daughter away from ever saying "ballerina" when asked what she wants to be. I mean, for me, ballerina is now right up there with stripper, whore, or any other variation of the 2 on the "things a father doesn't want his daughter becoming when she grows up" list.

Current and future fathers beware, the vertical pole is no longer the only pole we have to keep our little girls away from.

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Cowboys Keep Garrett

According to NFL.com's Mike Lombardi, Jerry Jones has decided to remove the interim tag and make Jason Garrett the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys.

I can't say I didn't see this one coming, Garrett has done a great job since taking over for Wade Phillips in November and bringing out the real playbook. It also didn't hurt that when asked about hiring a coach by the guys at the NFL Network last Saturday, Jerry Jones said that no coach has ever won a Super Bowl with one team and gone on to win another with another team, all-but ending any speculation of him going after Bill Cowher or Jon Gruden.

As a Cowboy fan, I'm fine with the decision, and can't wait to see what the 2011 Cowboys do when Tony Romo, Dez Bryant, and the new additions from the 2011 Draft (hopefully on the offensive line and in the secondary) arrive.

(Side note: I hate that we interviewed Ray Sherman when we knew Jason Garrett was our guy. The Rooney Rule is a joke.)

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NFL Winners & Losers: Week 17

Who knows who really gives a shit in Week 17 and who doesn't. Picking games this week is as much a crap shoot as picking games in Week 1, if not more. Oh well, let the games begin!

1PM Games

Panthers (2-13) @ Falcons (12-3)
Why would the Panthers try in this game?? They already have the first pick in the draft locked up. I think the Falcons will put this one away in the first half, and then rest. Falcons winners, Panthers losers.

Buccaneers (9-6) @ Saints (11-4)
The Bucs have an outside shot of making the playoffs, but they need a shitload of help. The Saints have a shot at the NFC's 2nd-seed, but they'd need the Panthers to beat the Falcons. Highly unlikely. At halftime they Saints will see the Falcons are up on the Panthers by 2 touchdowns and a few field goals, and Sean Payton will pull his guys, leading the way for a Bucs victory. Buccaneers winners, Saints losers.

Steelers (11-4) @ Browns (5-10)
With a win the Steelers lock up the AFC North and the 2nd-seed in the playoffs. They give a shit, as you can tell by the reports of Troy Polamalu returning for this game. Steelers winners, Browns losers.

Bengals (4-11) @ Ravens (11-4)
After the Bengals improbable win @Chargers last week, T.Ocho couldn't be found rooting any harder for the Ravens this week. If they Bengals win today, both of them are out of work, which actually isn't such a bad thing if you're Ochocinco, but it's terrible if you're Terrell Owens. But to be fair, Cincy probably wasn't gonna bring T.O. back anyway.

Back to football, the Ravens have a shot at the AFC North crown and the 2nd-seed in the playoffs with a win and a Steelers loss. If the Browns keep that game close, the Ravens will play this one out. Hell, I think they'll play it out regardless. Ravens winners, Bengals losers.

Dolphins (7-8) @ Patriots (13-2)
The Pats are sitting some guys, and the Dolphins have a shot to be the first team to finish 1-7 at home, and 7-1 on the road. Dolphins winners, Patriots losers.

Bills (4-11) @ Jets (10-5)
The Jets don't give a shit about this game, seeing our they're all-but locked into they're playoff spot and can't go any higher, so they're resting their guys. Bills winners, Jets losers.

Vikings (6-9) @ Lions (5-10)
With draft positioning on the line, I'd be fighting to lose this one if I were both teams. I really don't know why, but I'm just gonna take Detroit. Lions winners, Vikings losers.

Raiders (7-8) @ Chiefs (10-5)
The Raiders care about this game, but I'm not sure the Chiefs do. KC does have the opportunity to finish 8-0 at home on the season, so I think I'll ride with them. Chiefs winners, Raiders losers.

4PM Games

Cowboys (5-10) @ Eagles (10-5)
The Cowboys rallied around Jason Garrett after Wade Phillips was fired, and now it looks like they've got their man. Now that Garrett is the head coach, I don't see this as the week the Cowboys lay an egg. Couple that with Mike Vick not playing, and I'll (unfortunately) take my 'Boys. Besides, this game literally means nothing to the Eagles after they lost to the Vikings last Tuesday. Cowboys winners, Eagles losers.

Giants (9-6) @ Redskins (6-9)
Don't get me wrong, I don't like they Redskins whatsoever, but I think they Giants just want this season, and he Tom Coughlin era to be over, despite their (outside) shot at a playoff berth. Redskins winners, Giants losers.

Titans (6-9) @ Colts (9-6)
There's only 2 games I'm more confident about this week: Panthers @ Falcons, and Rams @ Seahawks. The Colts are going to win this game. Colts winners, Titans losers.

Jaguars (8-7) @ Texans (5-10)
Gary Kubiak gets to keep his job?? Huh?? Uhhh, ok then.

Even though the Jaguars need this game to have a shot at the playoffs, I don't think they can win without David Garrard AND Maurice Jones-Drew. Even against Houston's secondary. Texans winners, Jaguars losers.

Bears (11-4) @ Packers (9-6)
By virtue of the Eagles basically eliminating themselves from a shot at the 2-seed with that loss to the Vikings Tuesday, the Packers are probably headed to the playoffs. See, the Bears don't need this game, and really have no incentive to play, besides that old rah-rah stuff about beating rivals. They Bears are in, and they won't give a shit today. Packers winners, Bears losers.

Chargers (8-7) @ Broncos (4-11)
That loss to the Bengals sealed the Chargers fate, and I don't see why they'd come out and play hard in this game when they didn't come out and play hard with the playoffs on the line. Broncos winners, Chargers losers.

Cardinals (5-10) @ 49ers (5-10)
The Cardinals got lucky Christmas Day when David Buehler missed that extra point. I don't like their chances of luck on the road, especially when they haven't won outside of Arizona's borders since Week 1 in Sam Bradford's first game. And yeah, I know the Niners just got their coach fired, but they are still better than the Cardinals. Well, as long as they give a shit, and I'm not sure they do. Fuck it. 49ers winners, Cardinals losers.

Sunday Night Game

Rams (7-8) @ Seahawks (6-9)
I'm still baffled at how NBC let this be their Sunday night game. Then again, 2 sub-.500 teams fighting it out for the right to represent the NFL's worst division in the playoffs and lose to the Saints in the Wild Card game a week later, how could NBC say no??

Anyway, as much as I'd like to laugh at a 7-9 team making the NFL playoffs, Charlie Whitehurst's Seahawks are going to lose. Rams winners, Seahawks losers.

This Week: 10-6 (.625)
Overall Record: 154-102 (.602)
Last Week: 9-7 (.563)

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FiyahMuZik.com's Top 10 Albums Of 2010

Aight, sorry for the delay, but here it is, my annual top 10 albums list. Enjoy (but if you don't, too fuckin' bad, I'm the Hip-Hop Czar and this isn't up for debate).

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#9


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#6


#5


#4


#3


#2


#1





Honorable Mention:









For the slow, that's:

10) Ludacris - Battle Of The Sexes
9) Drake - Thank Me Later
8) Nas & Damian Marley - Distant Relatives
7) Capone-N-Noreaga - The War Report 2
6) Fat Joe - The Darkside Vol. 1
5) The Roots - How I Got Over
4) Big Boi - Sir Lucious Left Foot
3) Eminem - Recovery
2) Rick Ross - Teflon Don
1) Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Honorable Mention:
Lloyd Banks - Hunger For More 2
David Banner & 9th Wonder - Death Of A Pop Star
T.I. - No Mercy
Pimp C - The Naked Soul Of Sweet Jones

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FiyahMuZik.com's Top 10 Mixtapes Of 2010

Aight, top 10 mixtape of 2010 says the Hip-Hop Czar, let's do it!

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Honorable Mention:











If you weren't in the "know" enough to keep up with the covers, here's a quick run down of the proceedings this evening...

10) Diggy Simmons - Airborne
9) Yelawolf - Trunk Muzik
8) Nipsey Hu$le - The Marathon
7) Wale - More About Nothing
6) T.I. - Fuck A Mixtape
5) Young Jeezy - Trap Or Die II
4) The Game - Brake Lights
3) Joe Budden - Mood Muzik 4
2) Royce Da 5'9" - Bar Exam 3
1) J. Cole - Friday Night Lights

Honorable Mention:
B.o.B - No Genre
Fabolous - There Is No Competition 2
Jadakiss - The Champ Is Here 3
Joell Ortiz - Free Agent
Young Chris - The Re-Introduction

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