Anyway, I wanted to try something new, and I really liked the "winners/losers" thing Bill Simmons did in a column a few weeks back, so I stole it. Welp, here it is, the winners and losers of Super Bowl XLIV!
Winners: The Boost Mobile shuffle; the little black kid from the Doritos commercial; Joseph Addai; auto-tune, David Letterman, Oprah, and Jay Leno; casual Fridays; men without pants; Brett Favre in 2020, Warren Sapp jokes; little people (KISS commercial, Troy Polamalu commercial); Nickelodeon (they were showing "Malcolm In The Middle" during halftime and gave me something to watch); onside kicks; Sean Payton's balls; Garrett Hartly; eTrade babies; Tracy Porter; the Saints; the city of New Orleans.
Losers: People who came to Miami for Super Bowl weekend, but didn't have tickets to the game; Queen Latifah's singing performance; Emmitt Smith's coin toss; all Doritos commercial NOT starring that little black kid; Cars.com (Shouldn't Timothy Richman's infinite knowledge afford him whatever car he wants??); Kim Kardashian camera shots; the Super Bowl halftime show; the referee trying to explain why the 2-point conversion was good; Charles Barkley's rap skills; GoDaddy.com; anyone who only watched to see the commercials; Peyton Manning's legacy; Reggie Wayne; Haiti; running plays on 3rd down with about a minute left in the game when down 14; the Gatorade shower; the Miami Dolphins (they picked Dante Colpepper over Drew Brees a few years back); giving up on 16-0; resting starters; the Colts.
Have any to add?? Leave them in the comments!
(Side note: Special thanks to Adam Carolla for practically forcing me to pick the Saints.)
