October 04, 2009

Idicrary 101: Niggas & Pointless Tats

Nope, still nothing...
I'm thinking about making "Niggas & Pointless Tats" a regular segment on the website, but I don't know, lets take it slow and see how this goes.

First up we have Washington Wizards' guard DeShawn Stevenson and the curious decision to get all the essentials to a $5 bill tattooed on his neck. Of course, it always dumb to get anything tatted on your neck, but this is in particularly dumb because has no meaning. I can all but guarantee you that if you asked DeShawn why he did this he probably couldn't even you a reasonable answer. Its just pointless and retarded.

He doesn't wear #5, he was the 23rd pick in the draft, he's from Fresno, CA area code 559, not 505, Lincoln was the 16th President, 5+5=10, not 2, no one over 12 (that is also not a crackhead) goes out of their way for $5. I can't for the life of me figure out what he was thinking by getting this shit. And if you're gonna do this, why not get a $100 bill?? Or how about a $2 bill since you do wear that number?? Hell, I don't know, maybe he just likes Subway?? There's gotta be something I'm missing... but mostly likely not. Check out a close up:

I don't get it...
Aight lets move on to Birdman now who got the following tattoo to commemorate his girlfriend's boyfriend's birthday last week by getting "9-27-82" on his arm:

Birdman Is For Lovers
Two questions: 1) How gay is this?? 2) If you have so many tattoos that you have to overlap old tattoos to get new ones, isn't that a sign that you should stop getting tattoos??

I have nothing else to say about this gayness, lets go back to Deshawn:

Face crack
I want you to focus on the pic on the right side. Yeah, the crack coming from the top of his forehead. Now, unlike the $5, he actually had a reason for this tattoo. Take it away Mr. Stevenson: "I don't crack. I feel like people always try to break me, but I don't crack. So, I put that there." Really?? If you DON'T crack, wouldn't it be smart to NOT put a crack on you?? Or how about even one of those "No Smoking" circles with the cross through it on top of the crack?? Nope, just the crack.

His explanation is like saying, "I don't like gay sex. I feel like people always try to have gay sex with me, but I don't do gay sex," and then going out and have sex with a dude. Just plain retarded. And that's not even mentioning what the tat would look like if his hairline ever started to recede! Could be tragic.

Okay, so how did you guys like "Niggas & Pointless Tats"?? Is it a keeper?? E-mail me, Tweet me, or just leave a comment.