Fresh out of prison and back in the lab! Unfortunately, I don't know how many people know this is even coming out. I guess I'll give him 15-35 too.
November 30, 2010
This Week In Flops 11/30/10
Andre Johnson & Cortland Finnegan Fined $25,000 Each, No Suspension
Good, no suspension necessary. Hmm, maybe Roger Goodell and the NFL are finally turning the corner with dumbass suspensions?? Well whatever the case, I can't wait for round 2 December 19th.
(Side note: I know this is how Cortland plays, but what the fuck was he thinking?? Not only is Dre way bigger than him, but he's from Miami. You probably don't want to pick a fight with those guys.)
SOURCE
November 29, 2010
Lil Kim – Black Friday (Nicki Minaj Diss)
Well first and foremost, I'm hoping for Nicki Minaj's rebuttal to Lil Kim's recent mega nip slip from above. I think it'd be only right if Nicki replied with her own. Fair is fair.
As far as the song Black Friday is concerned, I thought it was pretty good. Sure the Pharoahe Monch Simon Says beat probably wasn't the best choice, and sure the diss ran about a minute too long, and of course Lil Kim didn't write, but other than that, I thought it was good.
Unlike everybody else, I'm not mad at Kim for going at Nicki with a diss record because Nicki is the one who took it to wax on Roman's Revenge. However, I am mad at Kim for even entertaining this BS in the first place. People kept talking all this rah-rah shit about Nicki biting Lil Kim's style, then Lil Kim comments on it and all of a sudden everybody is on some "Kim's old ass need to stop hatin' on Nicki" shit. But that's just like bum ass Hip-Hop fans though, push somebody into the ring and then switch on them when they start swinging. I say let's just call a truce because in 10-15 years when Nicki is in the same situation Kim is in and is pushed into the ring against the next new bitch, they can roll a blunt together and laugh, laugh, laugh.
The Situation Workout DVD Bloopers
Good ol' Sitch. I'm surprised he even makes mistakes after what I saw in his timeless performance in that safe sex commercial alongside Bristol Palin.
R.I.P. Leslie Nielsen
SOURCE
November 28, 2010
Somebody's Gonna Get Pregnant: Kenya Moore Behind The Scenes
Damn, damn, damn, FUCK! Kenya Moore is to modeling what Nyomi Banxxx is to porn. The chocolate brown chick in her late-30's that is prettier and finer than at least 85% of the women younger than her in her profession.
(Plus, I wouldn't mind seeing Kenya or Nyomi switch places and do each other's job.)
November 27, 2010
Thursday Billboard Update - 11/25/10
Rihanna's Only Girl (In the World) finally makes it to #1 after a few weeks of flirting in the top 5. Also, Cee-Lo Green's Fuck You finally cracks the top 10, sliding 13 spots 22-9.
The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold
1. Susan Boyle - The Gift (1-1)
2. Jackie Evancho - O Holy Night (2)
3. Rihanna - Loud (3)
4. Josh Groban - lluminations (4)
5. Kid Rock - Born Free (5)
6. Rascal Flatts - Nothing Like This (6)
7. Keith Urban - Get Closer (7)
8. Glee Cast - Christmas Album (8)
9. Taylor Swift - Speak Now (2-9)
10. Nelly - 5.0 (10)
- Cassidy's C.A.S.H. debuts at #145 with 5,200 sold.
first time top 10's in bold
1. Rihanna - Only Girl (In the World) (2-1)
2. Pink - Raise Your Glass (4-2)
3. Far*East Movement - Like A G6 (1-3)
4. Ke$ha - We R Who We R (6-4)
5. Nelly - Just A Dream (5-5)
6. Katy Perry - Firework (9-6)
7. Bruno Mars - Just The Way You Are (3-7)
8. Rihanna - What's My Name (7-8)
9. Cee-Lo - Fuck You (22-9)
10. Trey Songz - Bottoms Up (10-10)
- Bruno Mars' Grenade jumps 13 spots 30-17.
- Dr. Dre's Kush featuring Snoop Dogg and Akon debuts at #49...and I still won't believe Detox is dropping until it debuts in stores.
- Rihanna's S&M debuts at #53.
- Nelly's Liv Tonight with Keri Hilson debuts at #75.
- Michael Jackson returns home to the Hot 100 with Hold My Hand with Akon.
- Flo Rida's Turn Around (5, 4, 3, 2, 1) debuts at #98.
November 23, 2010
NFL Winners & Losers: Week 12
1) Saints (7-3) @ Cowboys (3-7)
I always love it when the Cowboys win, but it's time to remember the new goal for this season: get a top draft pick. We're all-but eliminated from the playoffs at this point, so let's keep our focus on remaining in the top 10 of the 2011 NFL Draft. Saints winners, Cowboys losers.
2) Packers (7-3) @ Falcons (8-2)
The Giants are the Back-Up QB Killers, and I think it's about time to label the Packers the Head Coach Killers. Two blow out wins over Dallas and Minnesota, two coaches handed pink slips the next day. Coincidence? I think not. Mike Smith, watch your ass, man.
Anyway, I know the Falcons are 5-0 at home, but they could easily be 2-3, so I don't think they're invincible there like a lot of "analysts" have led us to believe. Packers winners, Falcons losers.
3) Chargers (5-5) @ Colts (6-4)
It's a well-known fact that Peyton Manning is unstoppable in night games...well, that is unless he's playing the Chargers. Since 2007, the Colts are 1-3 against the Chargers overall, including the playoffs, and 1-2 against them in night games. In that same span, the Colts are 15-4 in night games against everyone else, including the Super Bowl XLIV loss to the Saints and the 2007 regular season finale when Manning and the starters weren't playing.
And even with all that being said, I'm still taking the Indy! Colts winners, Chargers losers.
4) Eagles (7-3) @ Bears (7-3)
Week after week after week I pick against the Bears and they burn me. Screw it, I'm gonna do it again! I won't believe they can beat Mike Vick until I see the shit with my own 2 eyes. Eagles winners, Bears losers.
5) Buccaneers (7-3) @ Ravens (7-3)
The Ravens are undefeated at home. I like that to continue Sunday. Ravens winners, Buccaneers losers.
6) Jaguars (6-4) @ Giants (6-4)
If Week 11 is any indicator, this could be a turnover battle of epic proportions. Each team had 5 turnovers last week (3 INTs and 2 lost fumbles for both), and playing out in the cold should only make it worse. Of course me saying that means there will be no turnovers in the game whatsoever, but either way, if the Giants start losing they can always just shut the lights off and try to escape like they did against my Cowboys. Giants winners, Jaguars losers.
7) Steelers (7-3) @ Bills (2-8)
Much like the Cowboys, the Bills are on a 2 game winning streak that will end in Week 12. Steelers winners, Bills losers.
8) Bengals (2-8) @ Jets (8-2)
I never seem to get this Thursday night game right, especially on Thanksgiving Day, but I'm pretty confident that the Jets will only have to play 1 half of this game to come away with a win. Jets winners, Bengals losers.
9) Chiefs (6-4) @ Seahawks (5-5)
This game really should be played on a neutral field because both the Chiefs and Seahawks are awesome at home and terrible on the road. Combined, these 2 clubs are 8-1 at home and 3-8 on the road (note: the 1 home loss came when Charlie Whitehurst had to play for Matt Hasselbeck). Seahawks winners, Chiefs losers.
10) Dolphins (5-5) @ Raiders (5-5)
I would like the Dolphins on the road, but I have no confidence their depleted offensive line can keep Tyler Thigpen (aka "Get Thiggy Wit It") standing upright. You know it's bad when your game plan is ruined when a guy who Cowboys fans were begging to get rid of (Cory Proctor) gets hurt. Raiders winners, Dolphins losers.
11) Vikings (3-7) @ Redskins (5-5)
Can Minnesota pull a Dallas and instantly turn things after their coach gets fired?? They don't have the benefit of an offensive coordinator (who was probably holding back the good plays) taking over, but I still think they can do it. Plus, if the Redskins struggled to put away FAU's own Rusty Smith, Brett Favre or Tavaris Jackson should have a field day. Vikings winners, Redskins losers.
(Side note: It feels good to have a fellow Owl in the NFL.)
12) Titans (5-5) @ Texans (4-6)
Speaking of Rusty Smith, looks like he could be the starter for the Titans Sunday now that Vince Young is on IR. This would be the greatest moment in FAU sports history if he does. How awesome would that be?? Yeah, I guess you're right, it's really not all that awesome.
If the Texans can't beat the pride of Boca Raton, AT HOME, then it's time to start over. Texans winners, Titans losers.
13) Rams (4-6) @ Broncos (3-7)
I wouldn't take the Rams on the road regardless, but especially not this week because they're a dome team going to Denver when the temp is dropping. Broncos winners, Rams losers.
14) Patriots (8-2) @ Lions (2-8)
This game really should be last because there's no more excruciating game to sit through that the Lions Thanksgiving game. When was the last time one of these was even competitive?? Can we leave get a new Thanksgiving Day team to co-headline with the Cowboys?? Patriots winners, Lions losers.
15) 49ers (3-7) @ Cardinals (3-7)
Why does ESPN continue to schedule this lame NFC West match up for Monday Night Football every year?? This is the 4th straight year we're gonna be forced into seeing this. ESPN, don't let it happen again next year. 49ers winners, Cardinals losers.
16) Panthers (1-9) @ Browns (3-7)
I can't see the Panthers winning again in 2010. Hell, I'm still not sure how they got the 1 W they have. Oh well. Browns winners, Panthers losers.
This Week: 10-6 (.625)
Overall Record: 104-72 (.591)
Last Week: 12-4 (.750)
I Love LaStarya
Twerk Team who?? Wow. Just wow.
I haven't don't a post on LaStarya in nearly a year and it's LONG overdue if you ask me. I'm gonna have to put something together soon...
Random News Shit: NFL Headlines Edition
Well it's about damn time, now he can finally return to his job as Michael Wilbon's co-host on PTI.
You know who this all sucks for?? Tarvaris Jackson. Why, you ask?? Because there's no way the black coach can step in and instantly insert the black QB into the line up. Not to mention that if he wants to keep this job he's gonna have to win games. Everybody hates Tarvaris *Everybody Hates Chris them voice.*
2) Vince Young Placed On IR
I'm not taking Jeff Fisher's side in this whole mess because he has been herky jerky with Vince Young in his career, but Vince is a sensitive bitch who needs to man up. Always whining and carrying on like a freaking child. Grow up nigga.
You know who the big loser in this situation is?? Randy Moss. Just a few weeks ago he was getting passes from Tom Brady, come Sunday he'll be getting them from Boca Raton's own Rusty Smith. "Randy Moss Quit-Mode" activated.
3) Tony Romo's Collarbone Is Still Broken
Fine. This season effectively ended when he initially got hurt, so there's no real reason to rush back. Get healthy and we'll see you in 2011 Romeo.
4) Richard Seymour Fined $25,000; No Suspension
Hell, the NFL should be giving Richard Seymour $25,000, not taking it away. You can't blame a guy for reacting to someone talking shit directly in their face.
I wonder if LeGarrette Blount called and consulted Seymour after this??
WWE Champion The Miz!
From the Real World to WWE Champion. Insane!
(Side note: Why does that little girl hate The Miz?? She looks like she wanted to take him on next.)
November 22, 2010
Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (Review)
1) Dark Fantasy
Not sure what the point of that Nicki Minaj intro was, but fuck it, it didn't take away from the song, so it's acceptable. You know what did take away from the song, though?? Kanye not spitting the rest of his 2nd BET Hip-Hop Awards cypher verse on the 2nd verse. Yes, I'm aware Dark Fantasy was probably recorded long before that G.O.O.D. Music cypher was even taped, but I'm sure Kanye knew which we'd be exposed to first. Look, all I'm saying is that 2nd cypher verse was ill as fuck, and I would've liked to hear more of it on the album.
I know that complaint above may seem like nitpicking, but Dark Fantasy was pretty flawless, and that's all I could come up with to detest. The beat is fresh as hell, the sample was dope, and Kanye rips it. Win, win, win. Awesome note to start the album out on. Let's move forward.
2) Gorgeous (feat. KiD CuDi & Raekwon)
If you told me beforehand that KiD CuDi was gonna be featured on the worst track of Kanye's album, I would've said "well, duh." Fortunately for CuDi, he isn't the reason this song fails to connect with being good.
OK, OK, I won't say Gorgeous is that bad of a song, but it just doesn't fit; it's too lifeless and boring. Reason: the beat! For about 4 minutes and 30 seconds, this beat sucks the life out of Kanye's–otherwise awesome–verses like a nagging, overbearing wife to a weak-minded husband. It's like Ye sampled Charlie Brown's teacher and had it playing in a loop until Raekwon starting spitting. It was damn near a waste of Raekwon feature. Unacceptable, especially following the strength of the Dark Fantasy.
3) POWER
I could write something new for Power, but I love my initial reaction to it back in May. Come relive it with me, won't you?
4) All Of The Lights (Interlude)
Why was this its own track?? This space could've been taken by a dope G.O.O.D. Friday song to help fill up this short ass album.
5) All Of The Lights
I don't know what the hell Kanye was talking about in that first verse, but outside of that, this is a pretty dope record. The beat is on point and I think Rihanna fit in nicely on the hook. It would've been nice to get a 3rd verse instead of roughly 2 minutes of instrumentation and hooks, but that's Kanye for you. I'll take it.
(Side note: Who was that chick that came on randomly about 3 minutes in?? I seriously have no idea who that was.)
6) Monster (feat. Rick Ross, Jay-Z & Nicki Minaj)
Monster was the very first of the G.O.O.D. Friday joints, and after all this time I still don't know what the purpose of Rick Ross' feature was. It doesn't hurt the song at all, but you have 3 strong verses from Kanye, Jay-Z, and Nicki Minaj...and then there's Rick's verse. Just odd.
Fortunately the pointlessness of Rick's verse doesn't ruin this monster of a record. Honestly, Monster was average when I first heard it, but it's really grown on me. Like I stated above, Kanye, Hov, and Nicki absolutely destroy this track. What more can you ask from a Hip-Hop record than that?? Exactly.
7) So Appalled (feat. RZA, Jay-Z, Pusha T, Swizz Beatz & CyHi Da Prynce)
So Appalled is another hardcore Hip-Hop joint. Hard beat, hard rhymes (Outside of Yeezy saying "we get O's like Cheerios." That was pretty corny.), Hip-Hip purest like myself can't do anything but gush over such records.
The only (minor) complaint I can muster for So Appalled is the fact that CyHi's verse was last. I feel like the song could've ended on a iller note, but he wasn't bad, so I'll take it. I'm just glad RZA didn't spit a verse. RZA doesn't get enough credit for how bad a rapper he is. If I told people to name some of the wackest rappers of all-time I'd get a lot of Soulja Boys, Birdmans, and Gucci Manes, but RZA definitely belong in that group. You don't believe me?? Go back and listen to some RZA solo shit. Spoiler alert: it's awful.
8) Devil In A Dress (feat. Rick Ross)
On Kanye's interview with Sway after his movie "Runaway" premiered, he said, "A hacker, man, they can't give you what I'ma give you, once it's the whole product." He was right, because I was shocked as hell when Ross just started rapping out of nowhere on Devil In A Dress. When I got the album, I didn't bother looking at the track list, I just played it, so I had no idea it was coming, and might I say it was quite the pleasant surprise. Ross totally makes up for that meaningless few bars he spit to start off Monster by Barry Bondsing Devil In A Dress. Ricky really takes the song to another level.
As far as the rest of the song goes, it's pure love. The beat is extraordinary and Kanye was clever and concise with the lyrics. Simply put: Devil In A Dress is strong as fuck!
9) Runaway (feat. Pusha T)
I could've really gone without the last 3 minutes of the final version of Runaway. The final product was just long for the sake of being long, and probably should've faded out around the 6 minute mark. I'd rather listen to somebody else take a piss than the last 3 minutes of Runaway. It's awful and excruciatingly annoying .
Other than that, I couldn't be any happier with the final product. Dope beat, dope lyrics, dope hook, dope sample (I'm so happy he brought the "look atcha" sample back), dope ass record.
10) Hell Of A Life
I wonder which pornstar inspired this song?? I'd like to thank her (and hopefully not him) for whatever she did that brought this incredible song about. I can't even come up with a minor complaint for Hell Of A Life. Nothing. As far as I'm concerned, it's flawless. I LOVE this fucking song!
Oh, and yes ladies, I fuck with the lights on ;-).
11) Blame Game (feat. John Legend & Chris Rock)
First off, Chris Rock is a fuckin' fool! Unlike Runaway, Blame Game has an extended ending I'm more than willing to listen to every time I hear the song. That was just hilarious and awesome on so many levels.
Speaking of being awesome, the rest of Blame Game wasn't too shabby itself. The instrumental was excellent, John Legend was perfect for the hook, and Kanye absolutely slits this track's throat and both wrists. Amazing, beautiful, timeless. No complaints.
12) Lost In The World (feat. Bon Iver)
I don't think I've ever been more satisfied with a 4-plus minute Hip-Hop record with only one verse than I am with Lost In The World. Honestly, I didn't even notice there was only one verse until after I heard it about 5 times. The song is just so well put together and full, that it really doesn't matter that it lacked lyrics. You have to hand it to Kanye, this record is ill.
13) Who Will Survive In America
Damn, I would've liked to end things with a song. This was all well and good, but I wasn't ready for Kanye's Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy to end, and this just tricked me into thinking there would be more.
Plus, I can't get over buddy saying, "All I want is a good home, and a wife, and a children..." A children?? He doesn't know who will survive in America, but we all know he didn't survive in English class.
Favorite Song:
Hell Of A Life (Prod. by Kanye West & Mike Caren)
Least Favorite Song:
Gorgeous (feat. KiD CuDi & Raekwon) (Prod. by Kanye West, No I.D.)
Overall:
Okay, let's talk about the flaws first.
Number 1: This album was entirely too short. Eleven songs isn't good enough, especially when you're dropping hot shit every week since August 27th. That's right, there were more G.O.O.D. Fridays (12) than songs on My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (11). And the what makes it really crazy is the fact that 3 of the tracks were G.O.O.D. Friday songs anyway. Might as well had thrown a few more on there to fill out the album. Do you think anyone would've complained if Lord, Lord, Lord or Chain Heavy or Take One For The Team were on the album?? I think not.
The only other real negatives come from the lackluster second track Gorgeous and the final 3 minutes of Runaway. Both were unnecessary and useless. I guess you could also say the lack of rap verses from Kanye was a problem, but honestly, I didn't even notice it until last night. Besides, it hurt Kanye's aspirations to become the best rapper of all-time, like he said he wanted to be, more than it hurt the album.
Now, let's discuss the possible disaster that Kanye avoided. Avoided disaster #1: Soulja Boy making the album. He threatened us with the idea, but Soulja was ultimately left off the project. Thank goodness. That would've been a error worse than Rick Ross and Big Boi having Gucci Mane on their albums. Crisis avoided. Avoided disaster #2: Not letting RZA rap on So Appalled. Again, RZA is an terrible, terrible rapper. Avoided disaster #3: Leaving See Me Now off the album, despite the Beyonce feature. That song was just boring, I'm sorry.
Aight, now here's the moment you've all been waiting for.
Back in July when I reviewed Rick Ross' Teflon Don, I said only one man had a chance to top him for Album Of The Year, and that was Kanye West. Unfortunately for Ross, that's exactly what Kanye did. My Beautiful Dark Fantasy is quite frankly the best album to come of in 2010. I can't give it a perfect rating, but I can give it the next best thing:
4.75/5
This Week In Flops 11/22/10
Kanye's album should obviously coast to victory this week, but how high can these figures get?? Could My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy do a milli?? Taylor Swift just did it a few weeks ago, and Black Friday will inflate the first week numbers, so it's possible. Personally, I don't think that's gonna happen, but I do think he'll finish upwards of 500,000. My guess is MBDTF lands in the 600-700k range.
Here's a confession: The main reason I don't think Kanye West's MBDTF will top 1 million sold first week is because Pink Friday is gonna vulture some of his sales. I mean, there's a possibility people get both, but I still think there's a lot that's get one or the other.
Anyway, I have Nicki doing big number as well and falling in the 200-260k range.
Well hopefully he can get some residual sales and finish between 80-120k.
Anyway, there doesn't seem to be too much excitement about this album, so I'll say 50-100k.
Richard Seymour Lays Hands On Big Ben
Dammit man, this shit is too funny! Richard Seymour put the hand of God right underneath Roethlisberger's facemask lol. I'm not sure why been flopped on the ground like he had been shot or was doing his best Vlade Divac impression, but this is all just so great. This is what the NFL has been missing!
November 20, 2010
The L.A.M.E. Awards Categories
- Lame Of The Year
- Lamest Rapper
- Lamest New Artist
- Lamest Song
- Lamest Movie
- Lamest Sports Story
- Lamest Tweeter
- Lamest Trend
- Lamest Hair (Male)
- Lamest Hair (Female)
- Lamest Beef
- Lamest Titles for an Album or Mixtape
- Lamest Artwork for an Album or Mixtape
- Lamest Miscellaneous Real Life People
Dr. Dre - Kush (feat. Snoop Dogg & Akon)
Look, I have no idea if Detox is ever really coming out, but this track is straight heat. It's badly in need of the real Nate Dogg, but other than that, I have zero complaints.
Here's a little bonus from Eminem and the good doctor.
Sick, sick shit. I don't know if this is a leftover from Recovery or it'll be on this allegedly Detox album, but this joint is insane!
Nicki Minaj - Moment 4 Life/Blazin'
First it was Willow Smith, now it's Nicki Minaj. Rihanna's spot in the game is definitely under fire right now because Nicki sounded just as good as Rihanna would have singing the hook. I'm just saying.
Anyway, nice track by Young Money's first couple (I don't care if they didn't really get married, we all know they're at least fucking). Neither overshadowed the other, it was a very nice blend, and a hot song. I approve.
Remember how Eminem did Nicki on Roman's Revenge?? Well Nicki just did that to Kanye on Blazin'. Wow. I'm not a big fan, but kudos to Nick, she ripped this.
Lloyd Banks - Sooner Or Later/Unexplainable
I haven't listened to H.F.M. 2 yet, but it sounds like it's shopping up to be even hotter than the first. This track is dope as hell, so if there's more of this on there, then Banks is back! It's a shame his label thought it'd be a good idea to drop on the same day as Kanye West and Nicki Minaj.
Nice track. I would've liked to hear Jada or Sheek accompany Banks and SP, but it's a good song regardless.
Yelawolf - Daddy's Lambo
Two things are for sure about Yelawolf: 1) he probably smells a little funny and 2) he has the sickest flow out of any new artists in YEARS! The concept of this song was flimsy, but his flow alone makes whatever he's talking about hot. I approve of this message.
T.I. - All She Wrote (feat. Eminem)
Man, people were talking about how bad Eminem murdered Nicki Minaj on her own track, but that wasn't shit compared to what he just did to T.I. on this song. You would think T.I. didn't know who he was sending this track to to get a feature from. If you want a Eminem feature then you better come with some of your best shit, and Tip really fell flat here. Very disappointing.
(Side note: Jay-Z and Eminem are far and away #1 and #2 all-time, right?? Doesn't matter which you have #1, but the gap between these 2 and the rest of the game is as big as KiD CuDi's head.)
Doesn't look like this is gonna make the album, and rightfully so.
Jay Electronica - Shiny Suit Theory/The Announcement
Nice little track, but you just know the interchangeable combination of Jay-Z, Jay Electronica, Kanye West, and J. Cole have much more incredible music in store. The shrewdest part of Jay-Z having all 3 of them on Roc Nation is that they're all producers and he'll continue to have the best production in Hip-Hop for as long as he wants to rap. Jay-Z for President...well after 2016, of course.
Man, how I'd love to hear a track like this jump off a Jay Electronica album. Very dope, no real negatives about it. It just feels right.
C'mon Son 20
November 19, 2010
Super Lupe Fiasco - Super Lupe Rap
To borrow a term from Pusha T, "YUCK!"
Swizz Beatz - Y'all Don’t Really Know/Kig Tut
Man, this would've been the shit if it came out in '99 or 2000. Not so much in 2010. DMX is almost on the verge of "Don't let him to the hook nobody what" status. Busta kills it though, and DMX's verses were good too. I'll pass this with a solid C.
Well that was pretty boring, but I agree with what Swizzy said, Hip-Hop is back. You're lying to yourself if you don't think 2010 hasn't been an incredible year for Hip-Hop. More real shit, less bullshit.
November 18, 2010
NFL Winners & Losers: Week 11
1) Colts (6-3) @ Patriots (7-2)
The Colts are obviously coming into New England way unmanned, but at least Peyton Manning will have the benefit of an offensive line to protect him, unlike Ben Roethlisberger. I say the Patriots control the game until the last possession, and Indy sneaks off with a win. Colts winners, Pats losers.
2) Giants (6-3) @ Eagles (6-3)
How about those Giants?? Welp, look forward to seeing a lot more confused sports commentators Monday because the G-Men are headed for another loss. If they couldn't handle Jon Kitna, what chance do they stand against Michael Vick?? Exxxxxactly. Eagles winners, Giants losers.
3) Packers (6-3) @ Vikings (3-6)
How appropriate is it that Aaron Rodgers and the Packers could possibly be the last team Brett Favre plays in his career? Yeah, I know there's 6 more games left after this one, but there's a strong possibility Clay Matthews detaches an appendage from Favre's body. It could happen.
Oh well, let's stick with things that will happen for now, like the Packers winning. Packers winners, Vikings losers.
4) Raiders (5-4) @ Steelers (6-3)
The Steelers are falling like flies right now. Maybe Ben Roethlisberger should've got some of his teammates to join in with the rape so they could've gotten the first 4 games off too. Steelers winners, Raiders losers.
5) Texans (4-5) @ Jets (7-2)
Losses don't get any tougher than the ones the Texans were handed last week when a batted down hail mary pass turned into a game winner touchdown (Why did I just say that as if you haven't seen the play?? My bad). I think that was the final blow to their playoff chances, and the Jets will put them out of their misery Sunday. Jets winners, Texans losers.
6) Broncos (3-6) @ Chargers (4-5)
The #1 team in passing yards (Chargers) vs. the #2 team in passing yards (Broncos), the defenses might as well stay home. It would be funny as shit if this turned out to be a low scoring defensive struggle though. Fortunately it won't. Chargers winners, Broncos losers.
7) Redskins (4-5) @ Titans (5-4)
I don't think the Redskins will lose by 31 again, but I also don't think they'll go on the road and win after losing by 31. I told you they weren't that good. Titans winners, Redskins losers.
8) Falcons (7-2) @ Rams (4-5)
The Rams are good at home, but the Falcons are flying a bit too high for them right now. Falcons winners, Rams losers.
9) Bears (6-3) @ Dolphins (5-4)
Man, the Dolphins were going through quarterbacks last week like Detox goes through release dates. That now leaves them with Tyler Thigpen starting, which actually might not be the worse thing that could've happened. We know Chad Pennington wasn't the answer, and Chad Henne needs to get his confidence back after being benched, so Thigpen is probably their best option right now, regardless of the injuries.
Oh well, it doesn't really matter because there's no way I'd take the road team on one of these shorts weeks unless they're were vastly better than the home team. The Bears aren't. Dolphins winners, Bears losers.
10) Browns (3-6) @ Jaguars (5-4)
I felt bad for the Browns when they lost last week...then I read this story about a grown fuckin' man from Cleveland tackling an 8 year-old child because he was wearing a New York Jets jersey. Oh yeah, that's why I didn't feel bad for Cleveland when LeBron, they're fans are douches. I mean seriously, an 8 year-old?? What, were all the cute kittens preoccupied??
Welp, I guess it's only a matter of time before this becomes LeBron's fault. Jaguars winners, fuck Cleveland fans.
11) Lions (2-7) @ Cowboys (2-7)
Who was that team playing in the white jerseys in New York last week?? That couldn't have been my Dallas Cowboys. No way.
Well whoever they were, I hope they come back to play again. Cowboys winners, Lions losers.
12) Buccaneers (6-3) @ 49ers (3-6)
How about that Troy Smith?? Two starts, two wins. I'm assuming no one will be chanting for David Carr this Sunday.
Unfortunately for the Niners, the Buccaneers have only lost to the likes of the Steelers, Saints, and Falcons. Bucs winners, 49ers losers.
13) Bills (1-8) @ Bengals (2-7)
The Bills finally got that elusive first win last week, and now I think it's time for the Bengals to get that elusive third win. Bengals winners, Bills losers.
14) Seahawks (5-4) @ Saints (6-3)
I think this is gonna be a Saints blow out. Reggie Bush is coming back, they're coming off a week of rest, and the week before that, they got a good win over the Steelers. Plus, it doesn't help that the Seahawks will be on the road again. And yeah, I know they burned me last week in Arizona, but I forgot to factor in how much the Cardinals suck. Saints winners, Seahawks losers.
15) Ravens (6-3) @ Panthers (1-8)
Less than 0% chance of an upset. Ravens winners, Panthers losers.
16) Cardinals (3-6) @ Chiefs (5-4)
The Cardinals suck. The end. Chiefs winners, Cardinals losers.
This Week: 12-4 (.750)
Overall Record: 94-66 (.586)
Last Week: 6-8 (.429)
Safe Sex With The Situation & Bristol Palin
Just looking at the latest "Dancing With The Stars" cast, and could the Candie's Foundation have picked any worse combination of them to do a sex safe commercial than Bristol Palin (teen parent) and The Situation (every club and bedroom scene of "Jersey Shore")??
Oh well, who cares?? This is the stuff all great comedies are made of, and yes, I'm assuming the Candie's Foundation is a new comedy group, because there's no way this commercial was not meant to be hysterical. I mean, just the acting alone. Wow. Oh, and the Magnums?? Whop-pi-yao! LMAO! Again, the stuff great comedies are made of!
Like A Bosh!
Like a Bosh! I'm gonna assume The Basketball Jones guys wrote this song before the season and paid Chris Bosh to play lost through the first 10 games of the season to set up for a huge game when the video was ready.
...Or maybe it was just a coincidence Bosh dropped 35 points in 30 minutes of play on the same day this video came out? You decide.
Bathroom Etiquette With Adam Carolla
Classic Carolla! I hope all you muthafuckas took notes, especially on the cell phone one. What the fuck is that anyway?? You can't wait 2 minutes until you're done to answer your fuckin' phone?? Assholes!
Anyway, there's another video from FunnyOrDie.com with Larry Miller after the jump. It's not as funny as the one above, but it's still worth a watch.
Jay-Z Appears On The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
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Good stuff. Gotta love Hov and you gotta love Stewart. There's another great Daily Show segment from last night's show after the jump that you're definitely gonna wanna check out. Trust me.
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
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Fuckin' hilarious! Oh, and I'm in the process of finding that complete Situation/Bristol Palin commercial right the fuck now!
Unbreaking News: Greg Oden Done For The Season...Again
Seriously though, the man should at least consider it. He's been in the league since 2007 and has only played in 82 games. Plus, what signs are there that he will ever not be hurt?? Greg Oden has a better shot at winning "Dancing With The Stars" than he does of playing a complete NBA season. Just call it a career now, dude.
SOURCE
Thursday Billboard Update - 11/18/10
Again there's a new #1, and it's Far*East Movement's Like A G6 returning to the top. Last week's #1, Rihanna's What's My Name with Drake, slips 6 spots to #7, and her other single Only Girl (In the World) slides up 2 to #2.
The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold
1. Susan Boyle - The Gift (1)
2. Taylor Swift - Speak Now (1-2)
3. Kid Cudi - Man on the Moon II (3)
4. Various Artists - Now 36 (4)
5. Bon Jovi - Greatest Hits (5)
6. Jason Aldean - My Kinda Party (2-6)
7. Reba McEntire - All the Women I Am (7)
8. Sugarland - The Incredible Machine (3-8)
9. Cee-Lo Green - The Lady Killer (9)
10. Lil Wayne - I Am Not a Human Being (5-10)
- Twista's Perfect Storm debuts at #42 with 14,200 sold.
- Trill Fam's All Or Nothing debuts at #49 with 13,100 records sold.
- Quincy Jones' Q Soul Bossa Nostra debuted at #86 with 6,700 copies sold. Oh well, he's filthy rich and has a hot daughter, he'll be alright.
first time top 10's in bold
1. Far*East Movement - Like A G6 (2-1)
2. Rihanna - Only Girl (In the World) (4-2)
3. Bruno Mars - Just The Way You Are (3-3)
4. Pink - Raise Your Glass (7-4)
5. Nelly - Just A Dream (6-5)
6. Ke$ha - We R Who We R (5-6)
7. Rihanna - What's My Name (1-7)
8. Glee Cast - Teenage Dream (8)
9. Katy Perry - Firework (10-9)
10. Trey Songz - Bottoms Up (8-10)
- The Black Eyed Peas debuts The Time (Dirty Bit) at #12.
- KiD CuDi's Marijuana debuts at #54.
- Lupe Fiasco's The Show Goes On opens up at #57.
- Jeremih's Down On Me featuring 50 Cent checks in at #67.
- KiD CuDi's Scott Mescudi Vs. The World with Cee-Lo Green starts at #92.
- Twista's Make A Movie featuring Chris Brown debuts at #94.
November 16, 2010
This Week In Flops 11/16/10
November 15, 2010
Howard Stern's Jay-Z Interview
Howard fucking Stern! What a fabulous interview that was. It's sad that Jay-Z was caught off-guard by Howard actually reading parts of the book because now-a-days everybody is too damn lazy to do much prep work on their upcoming guests. I already fucked with Stern, but this was definitely a cool point adder.
DMX Says "Fuck Jay-Z"
If you're not the waiting type, about 42 seconds into this video, for some off reason, DMX says, "New York to AZ. Niggas must be crazy. I’m the dog, FUCK Jay-Z!"
This is so random. For one, I didn't even know DMX was not in jail. Trying to keep up with DMX's freedom is like trying to keep up with rappers Kat Stacks has blown (I swear, if the game was about to start I would've come up with a better joke). And two, DMX has to know no one cares if he goes after Jay at this point. Granted, I cared enough to write this, but really, who would be interest in DMX beefing with Jay-Z?? If this were any point from '97-'03, yes, but not in 2010.
Besides, Hov is so far ahead of X at this point that I don't even think he'd response if X released an entire 16 track album of disses (ended with a prayer, of course).
Doug: The Movie
This wasn't all that, but for nostalgia purposes, this was EPIC! Grown Doug, grown Skeeter, grown Roger, grown Patti (and how about that rack on Ms. Mayonnaise?!), it was just insane. Poor Porkchop, but this shit was ill as fuck. I approve of this message.
...And the message after the jump as well.
Funnier. I wish I could've been involved in this project :-(.
Donovan McNabb: $78 Million Man
Seriously though, wow, $78 million for 5 more years?? I'm not saying Donovan doesn't deserve it, but this was random as fuck. I mean, I know they were talking about an extension, but I didn't know it was gonna be over 5 years or this lucrative.
Maybe the Shanahan era in Washington is coming to an end soon?? Dan Synder gave Jim Zorn a few seasons before he got canned, so I doubt it, but I wouldn't be all that surprised if he did fire him after the season. All Shanahan seems to do is pissed off Synder's highest paid players.
SOURCE
You Be Killin' Em!
Wow, Mizz Twerksum's titties in the mirror really stole the show. As Fab would say, "NIIIIIICCCCEEE!"
November 13, 2010
Page 2's 2010 NFL Logo Updates
Last year ESPN.com's Page 2 section updated NFL team logos to reflect their performances and it was so awesome they brought it back this year for midseason. There's 22 new logo this go-round, so to save time and space, I picked out my favorite 11. Enjoy!
(Side note: If you don't wanna stick around for my take, you can click here to go see all 22 logos on Page 2 now.)
Okay, nothing.
Oh well, I can't wait to see Randy in a Titans uniform! "Hide ya food, hide ya caterer" *Antoine Dodson voice.*
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