August 29, 2011

Random News Shit: It's Almost Here Edition

1) Eagles Gives Mike Vick 6-Year/$100M Deal
Ain't America something? Where else can you go from being a $100 million man to a broke social pariah in prison back to a $100 million man within 5 years? Oh yeah, no where.

These types of things don't happen often to ex-con, so I really think this is something to be celebrated. It's a shame I'm gonna have to root against him so vigorously this year.

This is good I guess, but he's still not playing in the opener if you ask me. Have you seen Peyton lately? He looks like Joe Decamillis after the Cowboys' indoor practice facility collapse in 2009. And that's not joke, his neck really is protruding like Joe D's. Now I'm obviously no doctor, but that doesn't seem like an ideal state to play football in. I don't expect shit from the Colts this year.

3) Cowboys Cut Andre Gurode
This is tough. I mean real tough (especially since his replacement, Phil Costa, is currently injured), but I guess it had to be done. I'm not sure why we waited until he was healthy and Costa was hurt to make the move (since it was clear Costa was probably gonna end up starting anyway), but you can't question Jerry I suppose.

Personally, I think as long as Romo, Miles, Dez, Witten, D-Ware, Ratliff, and the secondary stay healthy we should be fine regardless. Of course you can't tell that to fuck niggas like Jean-Jacques Taylor, who thinks we don't have a shot at the playoffs and will win 8 games tops, but oh well, I like being under the radar. It worked in '09.

4) Cedric Benson Sentenced To 20 Days In Jail
Yeah, the sentence will start when the Bengals go on their bye week, but it won't really matter because the Bengals will suck heavily this season.