2011 NFL Awards Handed Out

Maybe I'm tripping, but I don't recall the NFL ever giving out their awards in one plop on Super Bowl Eve like this before. Oh well, enjoy:

1) Aaron Rodgers Wins MVP In A Landslide
Votes for Aaron Rodgers: 48
Votes for Drew Brees: 2

Damn.

2) Drew Brees Wins Offsensive Player Of The Year

Aaron Rodgers bust Drew Brees' ass in the MVP voting, but Brees flipped it on him in the O.P.O.T.Y., winning 43-7. I'm totally fine with both of these first 2 awards.

3) Terrell Suggs Wins Defensive Player Of The Year
With 21 votes, T-Sizzle of Ball So Hard University beats out Jared Allen and his 14 votes (and 22 sacks) for D.P.O.T.Y. (which sadly could double as an acronym for an AVN Award for double penetration). I'm not mad at that, but I am mad that DeMarcus Ware didn't get a single vote. I guess 19.5 sacks just doesn't get you as far as it once did.

4) Cam Newton & Von Miller Win Rookie Of The Year Awards
Surprise! Cilla Cam Newton beats out Andy Dalton 47-3 and Von Miller beats out Aldon Smith 39-11. There's really nothing else to say because nobody should be surprised by these results at all.

5) Jim Harbaugh Wins Coach Of The Year
I'm starting to figure out why the NFL decided to give out all these awards at once because not of them are really even close. Harbaugh got 45 votes and Mike McCarthy and John Fox split the remaining 5.

6) Matt Stafford Wins Comeback Player Of The Year
With 21 votes Matt Stafford takes this one home, and rightfully so for him just staying healthy a full season. I am a little surprised Alex Smith didn't get more than 7 votes though.

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Aaron Rodgers Tribute (I Could Be Your Jordy)

This shit is hilarious, but that kid actually has a really, really good voice. Either way, I'd like to thank Aaron Rodgers as well for doing my Cowboys a solid and beating the Giants Sunday. I fucking appreciate the shit out of it.

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The Green Bay Packers Are Your Super Bowl XLV Champions

Welp, I definitively said the Pittsburgh Steelers would win the Super Bowl, and the Green Bay Packers came and took it from them. I really can't believe that Lil Wayne Green & Yellow freestyle didn't have any effect on the outcome. I guess the cheesiness of lines like "I'm up in this bitch with more blood than a blood vessel" only served to power on the Cheeseheads.

At the end of the day, the "Brett Favre shit sundae" factor (the worst way a horrible year could end for Brett would be with his replacement in Green Bay winning a Super Bowl) proved to be too strong. I knew that factor loomed since I listened to Kevin Hench bring it up on Adam Carolla's podcast last Friday, but I chose to ignore it. My bad.

Another factor I chose to ignore was the "Dave Dameshek at a Steelers game" factor. On Friday night I finally decided to listen to episode LXI of Daves Of Thunder and at the beginning Jacuzzi Pete said Dave Dameshek would be out next week because he was on assignment at the Super Bowl. On a recent episode of DOT, Dameshek was talking about how the Steelers always lose when he goes to their games (the 2004 AFC Championship game in their 15-1 season being one of them). For whatever reason I chose to ignore that as well. My bad.

BUT let me not get too caught up in these "factors," and ignore the fact that the Steelers played an awful game. I'm amazed they even had a shot at the end after how bad they played. I give Green Bay credit for sealing the deal, but they let a team hang around after turning the ball over 3 times. That's unacceptable. Great teams would've demolished the Steelers the way they played Sunday. I'm not trying to take anything away from them, but the win wasn't that impressive. Aaron Rodgers was impressive, but the Packers weren't as a team. Oh well, a win is a win.

The last thing I wanted to talk about is Green Bay being called "Titletown." Every single year I have to hear idiots talk about how the Dallas Cowboys are no longer America's Team, but nobody ever challenges Green Bay being called Titletown. Why? Last night gave Green Bay its 4th Super Bowl victory, there's 3 teams with more titles than them (Cowboys, 49ers, and Steelers)! We all know the Cowboys have the biggest fan base, so I don't know why we can't continue being America's Team unchallenged if Green Bay can be Titletown with less Super Bowls than 3 teams.

And last, but not least, doesn't it look like Clay Matthews is telling Aaron Rodgers to smell his finger in this picture?

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