Terrell Owens Cut By IFL Team

Here's the statement from Allen Wranglers owner Jon Frankel:

"Our fans are amongst the best in the league, and it is impossible to maintain a player when even our fans notice and comment on a player's lack of effort both on and off the field... We need to do what is best for this team, our fans and this community... It's disappointing and unfortunate, but [he] could no longer be tolerated by the Wrangler organization."

Sad, sad, sad. How do you get cut by an IFL team?? I'm still not totally positive it's a real league, and even they didn't want him. You know he just skyrocketed to the top of the Lamest Athletes leaderboard for the 2012 L.A.M.E. Awards.

I've been thinking about it and maybe he should've just let himself O.D. back in 2006? How would you rather your Hall Of Fame career end, overdosing on painkillers or getting cut by the fucking Allen Wranglers? Exactly.

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T.O. Joins The IFL

Rumors swirled late in 2011 that T.O. was in talks to join some arena football league called the IFL, and now those rumors have become reality. Check out the announcement from T.O. himself.

I swear this is like the saddest shit ever. If this isn't a PSA for wearing condoms and not knocking up a bunch of random hoes, I don't know what is. Fellas, wrap it up.

Hey, you know what would be funny? If the IFL didn't really exist and T.O. made it up to make us believe someone wanted him like Justin Long did in "Accepted." Bad times.

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T.O. Rushed To Hospital For Medical Emergency

Say it ain't so T.O.!

Hmm, what are the chances T.O.'s medical emergency was an inability to stop crying? I'd say it's at least 50% as likely as it being a 2nd drug overdose. Either way, I doubt this (among other things) will have teams lining up to give him a job any time soon ever. Bad times.

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T.O. Tears ACL

Even though T.O. has gone from being my favorite player to a scripted reality TV show star, I still hate to see this happen to him. I mean, let's face it, it was going to be hard enough for him to find a team to play for this season, but just imagine how much more difficult it'll be next season at the age of 38, coming off an ACL tear, to find work. Hopefully his role on VH1's "Single Ladies" will be a long lasting one because it appears that his career is over.

The only good thing (if there truly is one) about this whole story is that we don't know when or how it happened. For T.O.'s sake, hopefully it happened a few months back and word just got out...but I doubt it. Damn, I just remembered that we still might not have an NFL season...

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Fiyah's Show Of Disrespect Ep. 107

On today's show I reveal my first ever sponsor! Then I talk about Charlie Sheen, these high ass gas prices, and things in society that do more harm than good. Enjoy!

Fiyah's Show Of Disrespect Ep. 107 (Alt. Link)

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The NFL Fake Pregame Show With Dan LeBatard & Stugotz

Of course great job by LeBatard, but this DeJon Valentine is phenomenal at bringing these rejoiceful rants to life visually. Keep up the good work DeJon!

(Side note: WKRMe Cincinnati is an incredible name for Bengals. You gotta love that, you just gotta.)

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T.O. Chooses The Bengals

Cincinnati, you're welcome.

What am I talking about?? Well yesterday I wrote a column urging T.O. to join the Bengals over the Jets, then later that day we're hearing about T.O. picking the Bengals over the Jets (presumably right after reading my column). And no, I don't care if the Jets never made a formal offer and the Bengals were the only team with a deal on the table, I'm taking the credit any damn way. So yeah, Cincinnati you're welcome.

Anyway, as if I couldn't wait enough for the August 8th Hall Of Fame Game (the first preseason game of the season) between my Dallas Cowboys and the aforementioned Cincinnati Bengals, this happens. Romo, Miles, and Dez going up against the likes of T.O., Carson, and Ocho! It promises to be the most exciting 2 or 3 series of the first week of the preseason! Yes, yes, and more yes!

Now as many people have pointed out, the Bengals now employ a sizable amount of Cowboys castoffs in Tank Johnson, Roy L. Williams, Pacman Jones, and now T.O., so I'm thinking they're in need of a name change. I juggled through a few and decided "Cincinnati Cowboys" would be most appropriate (besides, "Cincinnati Castaways" and "Porkopolis Pariahs" just seemed mean). Any others??

(Side note: How many are those jokes about Jerry Jones gonna be in that locker room?? Man, it's gonna be brutal in there lol.)

The last piece of business that needs to be settled is who's gonna wear #81. As of right now, Antonio Bryant (aka the guy Cincy originally picked over T.O.) has the #81 jersey, but as we all know, T.O. has worn 81 since forever. As Skip Bayless pointed out, Bryant is the highest paid Bengals WR and that's not to mention he might see T.O. as a threat to his playing time, so maybe it won't be so easy getting him to give up the number?? We shall see.

Either way, drunk white women for everyone!

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The Decision: Jets Or Bengals??

Jim Gray: Terrell, have you made your decision?

Terrell: No, I wanna hear what my man Fiyah has to say first.

Jim Gray: Take it away, Fiyah.

Thanks Jim. Terrell, look man, you have GOT to pick the Bengals! I know everybody is talking about the Jets and them being Super Bowl favorites, but it's a setup. Mark my words: the '10 Jets equal the '08 Cowboys.

Think about it, there are a lot of similarities between the '10 Jets and the '08 Cowboys. Everybody thinks they'll represent their conference in the Super Bowl, they're going to be on Hard Knocks, and they have a fat defensive-minded coach. It's all there. And if you sign there, guess what happens when they don't win the Super Bowl?? That's right, just like on the '08 Cowboys, you'll get ALL the blame. Do you wanna go through that again?? Yeah, it'd be good drama for your VH1 reality show ("The T.O. Show" Sundays at 10:30pm ET), but that couldn't have been much fun in 2008. Stay far away from the Jets.

Now, the Bengals on the other hand, that's your best option. I know they picked opt-injured Antonio Bryant over you earlier this offseason, but now they clearly regret it and want to make amends. The owner, coaches, quarterback, and current top receiver all want you in town, that same current top receiver, Chad Ochocinco, has already said he's willing to concede top billing to you, and there's plenty of white women in Cincinnati. Win, win, and win, my man!

My only concern with joining the reigning AFC North champs is their brutal schedule, which ranks 4th toughest in the NFL (the Jets is ranked 18th, if you're keeping score at home). Other than that, you avoid all the unneeded pressure of having to win a Super Bowl this year and again becoming the scapegoat when it all falls down.

Make the right choice, Terrell. Pick the Bengals. Take it away, Jim.

Jim Gray: Now are you ready to make your decision, Terrell?

Terrell: Yes.

Jim Gray: And the answer to the question all of ESPN wants to know, Terrell, what's your decision?

Terrell: Umm, in this fall, this is very tough. In this fall I'm gonna take my talents to Porkopolis, and join the Cincinnati Bengals.

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Random News Shit: NFL Old Head Edition

1) LaDainian Tomlinson In Talks With Vikings, Jets LaDainian Tomlinson Sign 2-Year Deal With Jets
Wait, wait, wait, so the Vikings let Chester Taylor walk, and the Jets let Thomas Jones go for the possibility to get L.T.'s corpse?? Yeah, Taylor and Jones are both on the wrong side of 30 as well, but at least they have something left in the tank. Did these 2 teams see LaDainian play last year?? He just hits the hole and falls down, he's doner than done at this point.

Oh well, if L.T. and his agent can convince one of these clubs to give him a bunch of money even though he's a shell of himself, then more power to him.

I wrote all that before L.T. signed and I didn't feel like wasting it so I just crossed it out lol. Anyway, L.T. has chosen the New York over the Minnesota to house his remains for the 2010 season. Good luck with that New York.

2) Browns Sign Jake Delhomme
So the Browns got rid of Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn to bring in Jake Delhomme?? Really, Jake Delhomme?? I can't wait to hear how they try to sell that one to the fans in Cleveland.

And I'm not saying Anderson or Quinn were the answer in Cleveland, but outside of JaMarcus Russell, Delhomme was easily the next worst QB in the NFL last season. I mean, the guy threw 18 picks in 11 games, he was a turnover machine. Then to make matters worse, as soon as he got hurt, the Panthers instantly got better with Matt Moore at the helm. I hope Browns are planning on taking a QB with one of those many draft picks this April because a terrible Browns team plus Jake Delhomme as the starter may equal the 2nd 0-16 team in 3 years.

3) Bengals Choose Antonio Bryant Over T.O.
Despite Chad Ocho Cinco Johnson pleas on Twitter, Terrell Owens will NOT be lining up across the field from him next year in Cincinnati. Instead that position will be filled by ex-Cowboy, Buc, Brown, and 49er, Antonio Bryant.

Now yall know I'm a major supporter of T.O., but they probably made the right choice. I mean, of course Bryant is younger, but you just wouldn't wanna do that to Carson Palmer. The man already has to deal with the artist formerly known as Ocho, you can't just throw T.O. in there. Smart move. Well, if Bryant is healthy. If he isn't then they might as well take a chance on Owens.

4) Chiefs Add Thomas Jones
Nice addition by the Chiefs! Jamaal Charles is obviously the man in KC now, but Jones is definitely going to be able to help them. The Jets WILL regret choosing L.T. over Jones.

5) Redskins Sign Larry Johnson
Clinton Portis and Larry Johnson working out of the same backfield?? Man, if this was 2005 it would be on!

6) Dolphins Bring Back Chad Pennington
Smart move I say. Chad Henne is the man in Miami, but it'll be good for the youngster to have a proven veteran behind him (no homo). He also knows that if he doesn't play well he could get pulled quicker with Pennington back there oppose to Pat White or Tyler Thigpen.

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Random News Shit: Bullshit Edition

1) Ocho Cinco Fined $20,000 For $1 JOKE
We all knew it was gonna happen, but this is still such bullshit. Atlanta coach Mike Smith was fined just $15,000 for his involvement in a sideline altercation with players, but Estaban jokingly over a dollar was across the line and worth $20,000?? Again, IT WAS A DOLLAR! If anything he should've been fined $1 by the league. Just more reason to hate Dictator Goodell. I swear, if I wasn't such a big Cowboy fan I'd seriously think about not fuckin' with the NFL because it keeps doing dumb shit like this.

(Side note: I wonder if he'll get fined again for sending this "tweet" to President Obama.)

2) Hornets Fire Scott, Replaces Him With GM
Here's some more bullshit for you, the 2008 NBA Coach Of The Year Byron Scott got fired 9 games into an 82-game season in favor for the Hornets GM aka the guy responsible for bringing in the players that got them off to a 3-6 start. Brilliant.

I never really liked the Hornets, but now I sure as hell don't. I would wish they'd tank the season, but that would do them benefit because they'd get a high draft pick, so instead I'm hoping they go 41-41. Fuck the Hornets.

3) NFL Bans Captain Morgan Pose TD-Celebration
Keeping up with our bullshit theme, remember in last Sunday night's Cowboys/Eagles game when Brett Celek scored and got a 15-yard penalty after lifting his right leg as his touchdown celebration?? Well yeah, that little ditty has been banned by the NFL.

Apparently Captain Morgan was planning on donating money to the Gridiron Greats Assistance Fund, a nonprofit that helps retired NFL players, every time a player struck the pose after a touchdown. Well the NFL wanted no part of that because if it doesn't make the league itself money, its a problem. That's right, don't be fooled, this is ALL about money. We can play football games in Heinz Field and Lank Shark Stadium, and watch 50 million Coors and Bud Light commercials during breaks, but somehow donating to a good cause is a bad idea. Bullshit! Its only a bad idea because the NFL isn't directly profitting off of it.

See, the NFL is like Jerome on "Everybody Hates Chris," they're assholes unless you let them "borrow a dollar." Sad. Its not good when I get to point where I'm having to remind myself of why I love this game.

4) LeBron James To Change His Number In Honor Of Michael Jordan
I believe I remember hearing ramblings over the summer about LeBron possibly changing his jersey number to 6, but I never knew why. Well now I do. 'Bron thinks nobody in the league should be allowed to wear #23 and you know what?? He's probably right. There are MANY legends of this game from Russell to Dr. J to Magic to Bird, but Michael is the greatest so this is a commendable move.

Do I think the NBA should make it a rule that no player should wear #23?? No. If you retire Jordan's number league-wide, you'd have to retire all the greats numbers league-wide, but it'd be a nice way to show respect for the best by all NBA players currently wearing the number to change.

Now the only thing yet to be answered is what team jersey will that #6 be on?? Well we should all know it definitely won't be a Knicks jersey lol.

5) Klondike Sponsers T.O.-Ocho Cinco Roast
I burned so many calories on the other stories that I'll let you check this one out yourself, but its a pretty neat idea.

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Shots Fired By T.O.!

FiyahMuZik.com reporting what people write on Twitter as news?? Yeeaaahhh CNN and ESPN status baby! lol.

Anyway, you thought Mike Vick was gonna be the only big news out of the NFL for ESPN tomorrow?? Think again! Check out what T.O. had to say about the news that his "replacement" in Dallas, Roy Williams, had hurt his shoulder and watch ESPN blow it out of proportions tomorrow:

"The pressure has mounted n D-town...Stay tuned! This is WTEO81 reporting live frm Buffalo,NY. Wishing u a speedy recovery Roy!" Via @terrellowens

There is NO WAY ESPN is taking this and running with it lol. I love it though because T.O. should feel bitterness towards the Cowboys, they dropped him for the average-ness that is Roy Williams. I'd be bitter too. But I must say, there is probably more pressure on T.O. to get back on the field in Buffalo than there is for Roy to get back in Dallas. Though Roy is now the #1 receiver, there's no way he was gonna take us to the next level so its gonna be offense by committee this year and Romo will be spreading the ball around to a lot of different faces.

Put it like this, if Roy missed the entire season with this injury, the Cowboys would still be fine. If T.O. missed the entire season with his injury the whole city of Buffalo would probably explode. Got it?? Good!

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Roy Williams Hurts Shoulder In Practice

**UPDATE**
ESPN.com is now reporting that X-ray's on Roy's injured shoulder were negative and he's likely done of the rest of preseason.

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Looks like the Romo/Roy era might have to be put on pause for a minute as Roy fucked around and got hurt in a collision with 2nd year DB Orlando Scandrick. I haven't seen the play, but I do know they weren't practicing in pads and this was supposed to be a walk-through. So far all we know is that its a shoulder injury (not a broken collarbone like Joe Buck and Troy Aikman said on the Fox broadcast) and Roy will have an MRI and X-Ray tomorrow. Also Scandrick has come out and said he didn't try to hit him and was just trying to make a play on the ball.

Guess what though?? I'm not even mad about it. Whenever your number #1 receiver gets hurt you're supposed to be concerned, but I can't lie, I'm not. Its no military secret that I'm no Roy Williams fan and I'm gonna stay consistent with that. This gives our young WRs a chance to show what they can do with the 1st team at the least. I see this as a win/win. Hopefully Miles Austin doesn't fuck around and get hurt too with the extra reps he's gonna get Saturday.

Welp, we'll see how serious this injury is in the morning. I don't wanna wish the guy any misfortunate, but I wouldn't mind seeing Miles Austin or Sam Hurd lining up next to Patrick Crayton on September 13th in Tampa.

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T.O. Weighs In On Vick Suspension

Of course this will get blown out of proportions tomorrow on ESPN, but the man does have a point. Was Vick not suspended for the past 2 seasons already?? I remember Goodell suspending Vick before he even went to trail. I don't even think training camp had started when that happened and now he wants 4 more games?? The man's life has already been ruined, let him play!

Now, on the other end, even if Vick got with a team, what's the chance he'd actually see much, if any, playing time during the first 4 weeks?? Chances aren't much so the 4 game suspension will be irrelevant at the end of the day.

Hmm, I wonder if this will make the Bills think of maybe bringing in Vick to back up Trent Edwards??

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A Few Thoughts On 'The T.O. Show'

Can I be honest with you?? I don't feel at all like writing this piece BUT it has to be done. It just has to be done. Okay, lets make it happen.

For starters, let us all be clear and acknowledge the fact that this show is staged. I'm sorry to say it, but its CLEAR. This show is one cut above those scripted, pseudo reality shows like The Hills, Baldwin Hills, and that other one BET made that didn't do too well. VH1 handed down the script and everyone in the show is playing their role. It actually got to a point with me where I questioning whether the Cowboys cut him for real reasons or did VH1 convince them to do it for the reality show. Seriously, I was really wondering.

His publicists (damn the Foxxhole for fixing my mind to think white girl whenever I hear that word lol), Kita and Monique, seem pretty genuine, but they still come off like bad actresses. Now, I'm not saying they are, I'm just saying that's how the come off in the show. On Twitter (ugh, I hate how that sounds!), my boo Claudia Jordan told me they are really his PR people and have been so for years and are like family (no word on where these 2 were back when he had that accidental overdose a few year back because Kim Etheridge was his publicist then). Claudia is so fine I'll take word on just about anything lol.

Anyway, the move to L.A. was set up, the hot Asian realtor was set up, club scene was set up, the party afterwards at the house was set up, the dinner/hot tub/make out scene with the hot Asian realtor was set up. Basically the whole show was set up. I wouldn't even be surprised if we found out T.O.'s ex-fiance Felisha Terrell (yes, ironically that's her real name) was somehow on board with the staging of the show.

The only person who came off like he wasn't acting was T.O.'s bodyguard Pablo. I'm somewhat basing that on him seeming real, but mainly on the fact that T.O. is bigger than him. If VH1 was gonna cast a bodyguard, they would've got someone like 6'7" and 3-bills.

All in all, "The T.O. Show" was pretty bad. If VH1 was gonna script this show, I feel like they should have written a better one... or better actors. I don't know. Then again, its MUCH better than that coon shit VH1 usually plays with New York and all the other fools. So yeah, I'll probably watch the show anyway because now that "4th & Long" is gone off, I have nothing to watch at 10pm on Mondays. Can't wait for football season!!

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Monday Night TV Dilemma

Damn, this didn't even hit me until a few minutes ago, but I have a conflict of interest in tonight's 10pm time slot. First off, I've actually been watching Michael Irvin's "4th & Long" all season and tonight is the finale so I definitely wanna see who wins that and gets a spot on the Cowboys.

Now, at the same time "The T.O. Show" starts and I wanna see that shit too. I know I definitely am not a huge fan like I was pre naked-poster-gate, but I still wanna see AT LEAST the first episode. Not to mention there's no way Skip Bayless isn't gonna be talking about it tomorrow on 1st & 10! I just can't miss it.

So what do I do?? Remain a loyal Cowboy fan and watch "4th & Long" or do a check out my former favorite player and his "The T.O. Show"?? Quite a pickle I'm in here.

Okay, so here's the verdict: I've decided to watch the "4th & Long" finale. I NEED to see who makes the team out of Jesse Holley and Andrew Hawkins! We could use both and of them and I can't decide who I like better. I actually think they show take both and cut loose the always injured Isaiah Stanback. The winner gets Stanback's spot and the other gets the spot that was supposed to be reserved for the winner. Done and done. I'm almost certain that both of them right now are better for us than Stanback. The guy just can't stay on the field. Now watch they pull the rug out from under me and take one of the DBs lol.

Oh yeah and of course "The T.O. Show" is re-airing at 12am and 2am so I will undoubtedly see it before First Take starts at 10am tomorrow. Yay me!

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T.O. Shows Up On Jimmy Kimmel Live

Even though I gave up my T.O. fandom the other day, I'm still probably gonna end up watching the show Monday. I hope its not as dry as T.O. came off in this interview lol. I'd love to hear what Jimmy Kimmel had to say afterwards about basically having to carry T.O. on his back to get through the segment lol.

Related:
From 'Romo To T.O.,' To T.O. To Homo
T.O. Apologizes
Hitler's Mad At The Bills Signing T.O.
T.O. Signs With Bills
Cowboys Release T.O.

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From 'Romo To T.O.,' To T.O. To Homo

First of all, no homo. Second of all, pause. Third of all, no homo again.

Okay, now that we got that out of the way, wow. I mean wooooooow! Really T.O.?? This is how you do your loyal fans?? Its like that?? I feel like T.O. wants to fight me or something because this is straight disrespect. I'm offended. I'm disgusted. I'm...(come on Kev, be strong!)... I'm...(fight it Kev! Fight it!)... I'm...(aww fuck it!) I'm glad this guy is no longer a Cowboy!

Oh, the agony! Oh, the pain! That really wasn't easy to admit. I feel like somebody punched me in the chest and knock all the air out of me, but it had to be said. I mean we're still gonna miss his production on the field, but if he was gonna be doing homo shit like this then he could keep every yard and touchdown. There's no way I want the man in this photo on my team. I rather go 0-16. No, I rather go 0-16 2 years back to back. You'll be the laughing stock of the league every week regardless! Even if you win, you still lose. There's just no good that could possibly come from this.

If you thought T.O. disrupted locker rooms before, just imagine how shit is gonna be A.H. (after homory). You can't be a leader when you have a pic like this on the internet. Who wants to follow that guy?? I mean its one thing if it was a cell phone pic or something and some broad he used to fuck with put it out, but no, he willingly took this photo and released it like it was all good. I got news for you T.O. (and whatever idiot advisor that said this was a good idea), its sooooo NOT all good!

Matter of fact, its the exact opposite of good. Even if his first name was Good, he married Meagan Good, took her last name, signed to Kanye's label, and named this show "G.O.O.D. Music Presents Good Good's Good Show" this would STILL not be good.

Now, there are inevitably gonna be some fools out there saying I'm jealous of T.O.'s body or some elementary minded shit like that, but is MUCH deeper than that (no homo x2). Terrell Eldorado Owens has been my favorite player for years. I've stuck up for him no matter what! I even went against my fuckin' team to defend him, and this is how he re-pays me?!?!?

I wouldn't even be mad if the Bills cut him right now this instant. Hell, they probably should because the last thing they need is this kinda embarrassment.

You know what?? I'm not even mad. No, I'm not. I'm disappointed. Skip Bayless, you were right. Stephen Jones, you were right. Jerry Jones, you were right. Ed Werder, you were right. Matt Mosley, you were right. Everyone was right!!

I pray they didn't already cover this on 1st & 10 with Skip today! I need to hear him crucify him so I can officially put my T.O. fandom behind me (no homo). FiyahMuZik.com no longer supports No. 81. I'm done.

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A Little Bit More Confident About The Cowboys

Even though I was pissed off x10 when Jerry Jones decided to let Terrell Owens go back in February, I've had time to gather myself and possibly look forward to a halfway decent season. I mean, we're definitely gonna miss T.O. (there is 0 chance Roy Williams can fill that void, he's just not that good at the end of the day), but something I just read made me a little more confident about the upcoming season and it had nothing to do with any individual player.

Ready to hear what the big news is?? Can I get a drum roll? No? Okay, fuck you then! lol.

Anyway, the reason I'm more confident in the 2009 Dallas Cowboys is because they'll be returning to San Antonio and holding training camp in the indoor, air-conditioned Alamodome! I know, exciting stuff! Seriously though, before the 'Boys NFC-best 13-3 season in 2007, they practiced in the Alamodome. Before last year's 9-7 debacle, they practiced in Oxnard, California out in the heat because of a scheduling conflict. So there you have it.

I know it seems insignificant, but having camp in an air-conditioned dome verses having it out in the Cali sun makes a big difference. I don't know that for a fact, but I'm gonna act like I do because it makes me feel like we actually have a shot this year lol.

Now as far as the individual players go, I have a lot of confidence in Miles Austin and Sam Hurd's ability, but they have to be able to be on the field. They've learned under Terrell the past few seasons just like Terrell learned under Jerry Rice and I know they are both ready to have break out season if they can avoid injury. Those 2 guys are the key. If they can play 16 games I say the Cowboys go 10-6 or better, if they don't they'll go 8-8 or worse. But no matter what, I think our success hinges on whether Austin and Hurd can stay healthy.

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Suck On That Ed Werder!

He answered that last question on T.O. perfectly! All I wanna know is what's up with this bitch Ed Werder?? Why is he always trying to start shit?? He purposely tried to mangle T.O.'s word to make it seem like he was taking shots at Romo and Tony called him on it. Masterfully done.

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T.O. Apologizes

Check out T.O. on new Comedy Central show Tosh.0 which comes on Thursdays at 10pm.

Tosh.0	Thurs, 10pm / 9c
Terrell Owens Apologizes
www.comedycentral.com
Daniel Tosh Miss Teen South Carolina Demi Moore Picture

Not bad, not bad at all. You know, Tosh.0 actually is pretty funny. Daniel Tosh is a fuckin' fool and he is the perfect host for the show. If Andy and I hosted that show it would just be a bunch of laughing at our own inappropriate jokes so that wouldn't be any good lol.

Anyway, back on the subject of T.O., after being ripped by allegedly supermodel Joanna Krupa and kicked off of ABC's "Superstars" on the first episode, Eldorado made a return this week. He showed off why he's probably the best athlete in the world by completely dominating the competition in his return. Oh yeah, and don't forget his VH1 reality show "The T.O. Show" starts on the 20th of this month. T.O. overload maybe?? Yeah, most likely lol.

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