Kevin Hart Hosting The VMAs

While this is obviously excellent news, I have to ask why it didn't happen sooner? There was no host last year and Kevin Hart kept coming out and doing things, so why not just have had him hosting last year too? Oh well, I'm still happy for the new King of Comedy.

I'm also happy for my Dallas Cowboys because MTV clearly moved the VMAs up to a Thursday to distract me from the Cowboys-Giants season opener. What they hadn't anticipated was the NFL deciding to bump the game up to Wednesday so it wouldn't conflict with the Democratic National Convention.

Ha! In your face, MTV!

I don't care what anybody says, one of the higher-ups at MTV hates the Cowboys and is doing this shit on purpose. If the NFL hadn't bumped the game up a day, it would've been the 3rd time since 2007 the VMAs coincided with the Dallas Cowboys season opener. Coincidence? I think not.

(Side note: I wonder how much the Romney campaign had to pay MTV to randomly move the VMAs to Thursday for the first time sine 2006 to distract from the DNC?)

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Yes! The VMAs Are August 28th!

Thank you, Lord! Thank you!

If you're wondering why I'm so excited about the date of the VMAs, it's because for the past few years the VMAs have been on the same night as the first Sunday night football, and the Cowboys were scheduled to play in that game for a 3rd time in 5 years. I HATE trying to flip back and forth between the Cowboys and the VMAs (even though both sucked last year), so thank goodness I won't have to do that this year.

...Well, if there's a football season.

SOURCE

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Random News Shit: Entertainment Edition

1) Soulja Boy Ends Foolish Feud With Fabolous
Welp it's all over now. I guess somebody got into Soulja's ear (most likely somebody at Interscope) and explained to him how dumb he looks calling out Fab for making jokes at his expense as everyone else with internet access did.

I am glad it stayed on Twitter though, Fab would've looked silly taking Soulja out on wax when he's so clearly better than him.

Now it's time for Brian Pumper to step up and follow Soulja's lead lol.

2) BET Hip-Hop Award Nominees Announced
Look at those categories, doesn't it look like they just drew names from a hat?? Drake for Best Live Performance?? Jay-Z nominated 3 times in one category?? and most egregious, Nicki Minaj for Lyricists of the Year?? Come on now BET, y'all can do better than this.

Oh well, like most Hip-Hop fans, I'll only be watching to see the cyphers. Hopefully Joe Budden is invited back.

3) Eminem Performance To Open Up VMAs
Well this is awesome news, but I have something even better to share, I found a solution to my "fuck, the VMAs are gonna be on at the same time as the Cowboys game...FUCK!" problem! Dual TVs! That's right, I'm taking the TV from the living room, and putting it in my room. That way I can watch both at the same time, while still have computer access for Twitter efficiency. Fiyah, you are a fuckin' genius!

4) Jay-Z Signs Will Smith's Daughter Willow To Roc Nation
I'm a huge Will Smith fan, and I'm clearly a huge Jay-Z fan, but let's stop the madness. I'm not gonna bash a child of 9 years for making a terrible song, but c'mon son!

(Side note: Rihanna must be totally pissed off that Willow sounds exactly like her and that this song sounds telegraphed for her.)

5) SNL Adds Jay Pharoah To Cast
Congrats to buddy, hopefully they let him shine because SNL really hasn't been that colorful in recent years, if you know what I mean. Thank goodness someone can finally replace Fred Armisen when it's time for Barack Obama skits.

Anyway, if you've never heard for Jay, check out some of his impressions here. His shit is flawless.

(Side note: Anybody know why he spells his stage name "Pharoah" and not "Pharaoh"?? Seems odd, but maybe it's an inside joke or something.)

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Random News Shit: Entertainment Edition

1) Chelsea Handler To Host 2010 VMAs
Well it's about time they picked a host, I was beginning to think they were just gonna go without one after consecutive bombs by Russell Brand. I'm not mad at the selection of Chelsea, she's quite funny, but with this little time to prepare (unless this has been planned for months and they're just announcing it now) I'm not sure she'll be able to top what Aziz Ansari did at the MTV Movie Awards.

I have a bigger issue with the VMAs though, because not only does it air the same day as the NFL kickoff, but it's gonna be on AT THE SAME TIME AS THE COWBOYS GAME! What the fuck MTV?? Now I have to make a decision: watch my Cowboys open up the season in primetime at Redskins Park or watch the VMAs??

This also happened to me in 2007 when the Cowboys opened up the against the Giants in primetime and the VMAs were live from Las Vegas. It's partly the NFL's fault for scheduling the Cowboys there as well, but the VMAs shouldn't be going up against NFL's big time opening day. What ever happened to having the VMAs on Thursdays?? Either way, I'm pissed because of course I wanna watch my 'Boys, but at the same time, I wanna watch the VMAs and make jokes on Twitter like on all the rest of the award shows. I don't know, we'll see how it goes, I guess.

2) Wyclef In Hiding After Receiving Death Threats
I never weighed in on this whole Wyclef/president of Haiti business, but the shocking part of this story, to me, is that Haiti's presidential election is in November. I was thinking their election was in 2011 or something. I was just talking about short notice with Chelsea Handler and the VMAs but shit! Clef JUST announced he was running a couple weeks ago, now he has to put his whole campaign and stuff together for an election in 3 months?? I know Haiti is far from the U.S., but damn.

I'm not saying Clef running is a good or bad thing, I'm just saying there should probably be a cut off date as to when someone can jump into a political race. Three months, son, three months! That's insane lol.

3) Shocker: Jay-Z Tops The Hip-Hop Cash Kings Again
Over the past 12 months, Forbes has estimated that Jay-Z has made a whopping $63 million. That's $33 million than #2, Diddy. And to make things even crazier, Beyonce made even more than Jay did! B brought in $87 million over the past year, making her the 3rd highest earning musicians overall. On that list, U2 ($130 million) is 1st and AC/DC ($114 million) is 2nd. Jay-Z is the only rapper on there, and he ranks 6th.

And exactly why does everybody want to be a rapper again??

4) Jersey Shore Introduces New Cast Member
Her name is Deena Nicole Cortese, and she'll be Angelina's replacement for "Jersey Shore" season 3. As you can see from the picture and video on MTV.com, she's not that hot, but then again, outside of Sammi, who is??

No word yet on what her Guido nickname is going to be.

5) Swizz Beatz Signs New Record Deal, Readies Album
Hopefully it's better than One Man Band Man.

6) Flo Rida Working On New Double Album
Clearly Flo Rida still hasn't gotten the memo that we don't even want one Flo Rida album, let alone two.

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Kanye "Apologizes"

I say "apologize" because I still think the whole shit was staged, not because I don't like what Kanye wrote. Anyway, here's the apology:

"I'M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD'VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE'S IN THE BLEACHERS! ........................ I'M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!................. BEYONCE'S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I'M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN' THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE ... WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I'M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME... THAT'S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I'M NOT CRAZY YALL, I'M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I'M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!" Via Kanye's Blog

Again, I still say it was staged, but this was a good apology. Kanye IS NOT the only one who felt the way he did, he was just the only one with enough balls to get on stage and say it. And you know what I'm tired of?? Everybody having to hold their tongue because everybody is so fuckin' sensitive these days. And these we get all these people saying shit like "if you got something to say, say it in my face" but now all of a sudden that somehow doesn't apply. No one wants people talking bad about them behind their back, but everyone is basically saying Kanye should have.

I don't know, it really doesn't make a difference to me because they are both going to much a bunch of money off this whole thing and then we'll forget about it. And yes I said both, Kanye is gonna make money by having people like me come back and become his fan again after we were forced to abandone him when he was on that 808s & Heartbreak shit. I mean really, if this wasn't staged, what's more gangsta than this?? Kanye was drinking Henny on the red carpet and got onstage and took the mic! That's some G shit right there lol. Much respect to Kanye.

Oh, and in case you forgot, he's gonna be with Jay-Z and Rihanna tomorrow night to perform on the 1st episode of Jay Leno's show. Maybe they'll pull him in the mix and ask him about it lol.

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Old Kanye Is Back!

Put the PeeWee Herman suit and auto-tune in the closest, the old Kanye is BACK! You already know what happened so no need to explain, lets just get right into it.

First off, this was both the best AND the funniest shit to happen at the VMAs since the last time Chris Rock hosted in 2003. It was most likely totally staged just like the Eminem/Bruno shit from the MTV Movie Awards, but I still loved it anyway. I want to believe it really happened because that would mean the bold asshole that said what he wanted and made excellent music is back. Hip-Hop needs that Kanye.

The whole thing really isn't that serious anyway. Be clear, this WAS NOT Joe Wilson interrupting President Obama, this WAS NOT Chris Brown beating up Rihanna, this was Kanye West interrupting Taylor Swift. I mean people were online acting Taylor Swift was Queen Elizabeth and Kanye tripped her off the stage. Taylor Swift is just Taylor Swift, and all 'Ye did was grab the mic, say what he felt, and leave. That's it. Lets stop acting like he beat the ho up or was choking out a retarded kid lol.

Now, I know everybody wants to be like "poor Taylor Swift" but I'm sure she's fine, and if she isn't she will be when she reaps the benefits from this whole thing. This week Jay-Z already has the #1 spot locked up, but look for Taylor to sell a whole bunch of pity records and take over that spot the week after. I bet you anything she's AT LEAST in the top 5 next week. Either way, Taylor Swift's record label should be writing Kanye a fat check right now for this blessing to her career (if they didn't already when they set it all up).

And everybody needs to calm down on the "I hate Kanye now blah blah" shit, after a week or 2 no one will even care that this happened. No one will care about this the next time Kanye makes a major hit and drops an album. Just like nobody cared when Kanye spazzed at the 2007 VMAs when he performed last at the 2008 VMAs, nobody will care about this when it comes time for the 2010 VMAs. Its just the truth.

Anyway, I said this earlier tonight, but what was lost in all this hoopla is that Beyonce video was undoubtedly better than every one of those other videos nominated. It wasn't even close. That's not even an opinion, its a fact.

As for the actual award show, the shit was mostly wack. Russell Brand still isn't funny, Lady GaGa is fuckin' weird, and I didn't know half the people presenting awards. The only thing I liked, besides Kanye, was Beyonce's performance, Jay-Z's performance, and Jack Black coming out with those plastic arms and praying to the devil. That shit was hilarious too lol.

Oh, and if you hadn't realized it by now, I'm officially a Kanye West fan again!

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MJ Reigns Over The VMAs

Where they get all the gloves from?? Oh, and why?? I have yet to see thing promo on TV so it looks like a waste of time and money to me.

Anyway, Janet's performs will start at 9pm sharp so so much for her opening the show.

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Random News Shit: Pop Culture Edition

1) Ellen DeGeneres To Become 4th Judge On American Idol
What's a better way to start off Random News Shit than a story about Ellen DeGeneres becoming a judge on American Idol!

Okay, there's 2 reasons why this is dumb and one reason why its smart. The reason its smart is because Ellen makes so much money off of her talk show that she probably won't demand to be paid as much as the other judges like Paula.

Now, its also dumb because 1) Ellen isn't a musician or songwriter of any sorts that I know of so people will be pissed by her unqualifiedness (yeah that's a new Fiyah word you won't find in the dictionary lol) and 2) she's replacing Paula and not Kara. I liked Paula but the jury is still out on Kara because she's taking speaking time away from Simon and not funny like Ellen. I mean at least Ellen would be saying something funny in the time she's taking from Simon, Kara is just wack.

Good luck to you Ellen.

2) Janet Jackson To Preform MJ Tribute At VMAs Sunday
Oh yeah the VMAs are Sunday, huh? Luckily for them I have no vested interest in watching every snap of the Packers/Bears game so I'll be checking for this. I know its gonna be the shit! Then again, after last year's show, it can't get any worse.

Anyway, I heard that Janet was gonna be opening up the show with the tribute so it should be a good look. Watch everybody talk about how much better the the VMA's MJ tirbutes were than the BET Awards ones even though MTV has had 2 and a half months to prepare lol.

I also heard Jay-Z was gonna be performing Empire State Of Mind with Alicia Keys so look for that too.

3) MJ Movie "This Is It" Trailer To Debuts on VMAs
I didn't even know they were making this movie. Oh well I'll see what its about but I probably won't wanna see it because its still too soon. I'm sorry, I just get that way about people who die. For example, I still haven't seen Soul Men because Bernie Mac is in it and he's been dead for over a year now. Its not you, its me lol.

4) Soulja Boy Wants To Collab With Jay-Z & Eminem

'Nuff said.

5) Uncensored Version Of "Gia" To Be Re-Released
Oooh this is a good look! I loooooved this movie! Then again, what 13 year-old kid in 1998 wouldn't?? HBO was so good to me back then. Awww the good ol' days. Angelina will always have a special place in my heart because of this and that other movie she did back then and showed her boobies in. I think it had Fire in the title, but I'm too lazy to Google it right now lol.

Anyway, I can't wait to see this scene! I mean it won't be as powerful as it would've been to me if it was still '98, but I'd still like to see it. No word on when this is coming out just yet though, but speaking of nudity...

6) Hugh Hefner Files for Divorce
I swear I didn't even know Hef was married lol. They've been separated since 1998! I know old people move slow but this takes it to a whole other level.

Oh well, Hef can do no wrong in my eyes because he's such an OG at this point.

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Random News Shit

1) People.com Reporting Tony Romo & Jessica Simpson Split
Keep in mind, this report surfaces every few months about these 2 breaking up.

With that being said, if this is true, I think this is the beginning of another reason I'm more confident in my Cowboys! First the return the to Alamo for training camp, then former Cowboy T.O. goes homo, and now the Jessica Simpson curse may be broken. This offseason just keeps getting better and better! ...Well you know, as far as meaningless off the field things are concerned.

2) Ryan Signs $45M Deal To Remain 'Idol' Host
And this is $45 million over like 12 years, this is $45 million for 3 years! Three! That's $15 million a year to host American Idol! I touched on this on Twitter yesterday (yeah I made one unfortunately if you hadn't noticed), but kids should say fuck practicing a jumpshot, or getting a fast 40 time, or worrying about getting yelled at by some old white guy because you can make just as much, if not more doing nothing like Ryan Seacrest. I mean really, what does Ryan Seacrest bring to the show?? You could replace him with any random white guy and no one would care. Replace Randy, Paula, or Simon and you may have some issues (on a side note, if Seacrest is getting $15M a year, how much are the the judges making?? Geez!).

3) Russell Brand To Host 2009 VMAs
MTV obviously doesn't learn from its mistakes because after the colossal failure that was the 2008 VMAs, they've welcomed Russell Brand back to host. To be fair, Russell wasn't the only reason last year's show sucked, but if I'm MTV I'm not going to try to put that behind me and bring back the same host.

I don't know, maybe its just me. The good news is that its gonna be back in New York so it won't be in that weird, small room like last year. That shit looked like my elementary school auditorium.

4) Tom Brady Is An Asshole
That's right, I said it! I don't know if you heard about this, but this guy Dennis Paiva is being forced to re-pay Brady for 2 $8,000 planters he "stole" and sold for $450. Here's the thing about it though, the planters were NEXT TO THE TRASH. He didn't even know they belonged to Tom Brady. Now the 61 year-old is being forced to pay $4,000 restitution to Brady’s realty trust. Really Tom?? You couldn't afford to say "fuck it" and move on?? You gotta hassle this poor guy (literally) to pay you back??

Thank goodness a local businessman decided to step in and took care of the $4,000 bill. He thinks there's a good chance Tom doesn't even know about the situation, but I seriously doubt it. I mean, of course Tom wasn't present at court or cursed him out in a YouTube video, but to say Tom doesn't even know is probably wishful thinking from a Pats fan.

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Somebody Needs To Be Fired!

Ayo I dunno who put this year's VMAs together, but somebody needs to be fired! I dunno if they spent this year's budget trying to do that shit in Las Vegas last year, but fuck! MTV, you can do better than this. First off, what was up with that little ass room it was in?? Shit looks like the place where they tape FNMTV. Hell, Club Comic View had more room than that lol. On top of all that Russell Brand was dry as hell for the most part. I liked him in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but stand-up ain't for everybody lol. You know something is wrong in the world when the BET Awards were better than the VMAs.

The best part of the show, to me, was Kanye's performance of his new single Love Lockdown. I really didn't know what to think before he came on because the of type of shit he's been on lately, but I thought the song was dope. I mean I gotta hear the mp3 to make a final determination, but it sounded good live. I'm just happy he didn't come with no T-Pain shit because honestly that's what I thought he was gonna do...but he didn't so I'm proud...plus Love Lockdown sounds very #1 single-ish to me. Now, I dunno what was up with that PeeWee Herman suit he had on, but that's a whole other conversation lol.

Oh yeah, and were me and Andy the only 2 to notice Lil Wayne had a lip ring in?? I mean the nigga was already extremely homo-ish, but damn! lol. Oh, and damn Britney is back nigga, she was lookin' fine as hell like it was '98 all over again lol.

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Britney Spears VMAs 2007 Performance

Nope not quite, its just me again talking about those crappy VMAs last night lol.

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Fiyah Notez: VMAs 2007

HOUR 1

-"Its Britney bitch!"
-Damn is Britney pregnant again?? LOL.
-This performance is pretty boring, is Madonna & Christina gonna come
out and kiss to help her out some? She should've stretched or something
because she's looking pretty stiff lol.
-Forget everything I just said, 50's expression says it all! LMAO.
-Sarah Silverman again? She just hosted the Movie Awards...shits about
to get real disrespectful! lol.
-Sarah is bombing! Damn this is worse than Jack Black last year LMAO.
-Thank goodness she left, that was awful.
-Oh that boy Mark Ronson!
-Yeah right Alicia you're crazy if MTV isn't gonna play this 1000 times
by the end of this week. Oh yeah and that was a pretty bad joke too
lol.
-Why is Justin Timberlake beat boxing??
-So Alicia is not gonna acknowledge that that niggas mic wasn't work??
LOL.
-I must say that so far this show is WACK.
-Why wasn't Irreplaceable nominated for Monster Single?? It was #1 for 10 weeks straight.
-The format for this show is pretty lame.
-Kanye is still performing Stronger?? Nevermind back to commercial.
-Why does Robin Thicke sound so monotone??
-Kanye West is a social activist??
-How does Justin Timberlake win this award over Jay-Z and Beyonce??
-Cowboys score again bitch! 16-6.
-Beyonce's tits look phenomenal!
-I LOVE this Maroon 5 song! It sounds hot live too.
-Why do we keep going to commercial during the performances?? They seem
to be the only thing worth watching...well besides Beyonce of course
lol.
-Yo why we keep missing all the performances?? This show is totally ass
unless you're actually there, great for 95% of us at home.
-So we don't get to see T.I. Perform, but we're suggested to see Chris
Brown's non-speaking ass??
-Chris's dancing has improved, but Omarion is still putting him to
sleep.
-Rihanna has some of the best legs in the game! I could see myself
skeetin' on them too lol.
-Someone tell Chris Brown we've already seen him do all of Michael
Jackson's moves in his videos lol.
-Is that Will Smith's son on stage with CB??
-Chris Brown's performance has been the highlight thus far, but that
really isn't saying much for this show lol.
-How the fuck did the Giants catch up?? 17-16.
-Kanye West and Bentley are actively losing cool points for dancing, and
even being on the stage while Soulja Boy is "performing" this ol' coon
ass shit.
-Surprise, surprise Justin Timberlake won again.
-Timberfake did have a point, MTV does need to play more videos because
their shows suck ass now.
-Cee-Lo's voice is so dope! I can't wait until the new Gnarls album
drops!
-Tila Tequila is ugly as hell! More proof MTV should play more videos
lmao.

HOUR 2

-Why isn't 50 performing on the main stage??
-That boy one Shia! He's having a hard time with that teleprompter I see
lol.
-This show is going bad! Why are they just announcing Pam Anderson and
the camera is already on her?? lol.
-Tommy Lee should stop for real, that's not funny lol.
-Where did Kanye get this didlo-eqsue mic from?? That's not gonna help
him out with the gay rumors at all lol.
-Kanye really didn't need T-Pain for this, he just looks real outta
place lol.
-Wow there is damn near no color in Kanye's suite...hmm hidden racism???
lol.
-Oh snap they actually let Lil Wayne in the building!
-Damn that Wayne verse was terrible LOL.
-Was that Terrence J from 106 & Park rappin' after Wayne??
-This Timbaland beat is crazy!
-I don't see what was so great about this performance but to each his
own lol.
-Is this System Of A Down performing?? If so where in the hell have they
been??
-I knew I should've ate before the show started.
-Then again, if I left for McDonald's now I wouldn't be missing much
lol.
-You know its too bad Amy Winehouse is all coked out because I would've
loved to see her perform tonight.
-Rihanna is doing a terrible job lip-syncing this crappy Shut Up & Drive
song.
-Why does Kid Rock have that cowboy shirt with rhinestones on??
-Damn Nelly got jacked!
-Boy, boy, boy, what I'd give to get Alicia Keys pregnant! ...Even with
that terrible outfit on.
-Look at the nigga in the front row tryna be discreet taking a picture
of Alicia Keys... somebody should tell him that if he sits in the front
he's gonna be on TV lol.
-When did Alicia's ass get so phat? This is great!
-I'd fuck Alicia just like that on the piano chair, no lie lol.
-Mrs. Chestnut Ms. Keys is BACK!
-Yes Chris, salute a REAL talent.
-Tony Romo just ran for a touchdown! Damn we gettin' that ass no homo
lol. 31-19.
-I wonder if Kid Rock and Tommy Lee really fought? I was thinking it was
weird for all 3 of them to be there lol.
-Jamie Foxx should have hosted the show again because just that little bit
destroyed Sarah Silverman's bomb lol.
-Oh goodness Miss Teen South Carolina!
-I think she really did fuck up and just went with it lol.
-Its funny how they cut her off though lol.
-I thought there was supposed to be 16 straight guys on Tila Tequila's
show? I just saw at least one in that 30 second spot lol.
-I guess I can scrap the blog I was gonna write about the show since
everybody knows about it now lol.
-31-22 on the Cowboy game
-Nevermind, we scored again its 37-22! T.O. is that nigga!
-Mary looks nice. I remember back in the 90s she was a mess on the
fashion tip.
-Mary is fuckin' up lol.
-WTF! Dr. Dre is swoll as fuck! LMAO!!!
-He needs to get out the gym and into the studio and put out Detox!
-I really don't see the point of giving Dre such a great introduction
just for him to give out an award lol.

HOUR 3

-Wow, I guess Kid Rock and Tommy Lee really did fight lmao.
-I hope this isn't really the final performance because this is boring
lol.
-Why is D.O.E. & Timbaland's brother there since they obviously didn't
turn on their mics??
-Damn Tim is swoll! I need to hit the gym lol.
-Keri Hilson is pretty as hell!
-How did I know Timberfake was coming out?? lol.
-Nelly Furtado should fire her stylist if she has one.
-That's it????
-That performance was straight, but not final performance worthy.
-Is it just me or did they only give out like 4 awards?? lol.

POST SHOW

-That's funny they say Britney got people talking with her "racy
performance" because I totaly forget she even performed lol.
-What was so incredible about Chris Brown dancing like MJ?? I've seen
everyone from Carlton to Ashton Kutcher do it, nothing new or amazing
there lol.
-Damn Kid Rock & Tommy Lee really did fight! I would've loved to see
that!
-Well that Post Show sure did suck monkey balls.
-Welp so much for this show only being on once because, in true MTV
fashion, its on again right now lol.

In conclusion, I'd have to say that was a terrible show. I wish I had
more hands so I could give that show 4 thumbs down...okay maybe I
should've left that joke to the Dave Chappelle's of the world, but this
show was so bad it doesn't deserve my originality. I should've just
watched the whole Cowboy game its 38-35 people! I'm out!!!

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Fiyah Notez: VMAs Pre-Show 2007

Welp, its that time of year again and the VMAs are upon us! It brings me much pleasure to write these notes for you guys BUT don't for a second think I'm not gonna be watching the Cowboys game too lol. Anyway, lets just hope this show is better than that debacle of a show last year.

-John is WAYYYY too old to be dressed like that... he looks gay now...
no literally lol. That, and like 80's throw-up.
-Damn homegirl from Transformer is FINE! I wonder if T.I. is smashin'
that?? lol.
-Rihanna doesn't date Shia Lebeauf! They were just in one damn picture
together...hell they weren't even standing next to each other, they were
just in the same room.
-Jackpot or Jack-not?? How long did it take to come up with that fine
piece of genius??
-Damn Chris Brown's ass STILL can't talk lol.
-LMAO what the FUCK does Lil Mama have on LMAO that's already the worst
outfit in VMA history HANDS DOWN! Its like a jumpsuit/onesie/Oompa
Loompa pants...I dunno its just terrible lol.
-Alicia Keys could most definitely have my babies...and not just on her
face and/or back
-Why this UK nigga keep asking people if they think Britney can come
back??? NO she can't, she's an idiot duh!
-Oh that boy Com! Common is that nigga.
-Damn why these white boys clothes so damn small?? LMAO. I mean shit you
can see that one dude's belly button and shit. I dunno where they gon
spandex jeans from but you each his own.
-Damn my Cowboys down 6-0...oh you thought I wasn't gon watch the game
for real?? lmao!
-50 Cent should wear a hat.
-Why Luda got that old man suit on??
-LMAO @ Lil Wayne performing in the pre-show. How is he the "hottest
rapper in the game" and "the best rapper alive" and aint even famous
enough to perform on the real show??? Hell he wouldn't even have been
invited he wasn't on Nicole S. fine ass's song...damn shame, yeah REAL
hot MTV lol.
-No touchdown but oh well we'll take the field goal.
-Dude from Gym Class Heroes said they wanted to have a real Hip-Hop
video... hmm nobody must've told him "bling" was probably the LEAST
Hip-Hop thing you can say lol.
-Wassup wit the tux Kanye??? Speaking of fashion, damn Lil Mama looked
terrible LMAO!
-Thanks for clearing that up 'Ye, I dunno why white people the
media always thinks someone has beef lol.
-I know they didn't just give Lil Mama a "Jackpot" for her outfit! MTV
is fuckin' up!
-Again, wassup with these white boys and these tight ass fairy pants??
-Damn the Clipse still have to introduce themselves LMAO.
-Who invited Lil Darryl Soulja Boy?? Fuck it, he might as well go once because we
all know next year this time it'll be back to irrelevance for him lol.
-Why does Ne-Yo have a bandanna around his neck??
-Foo Fighters?? Them niggas still alive?? ...And once again with the
fairy pants lol.
-The Pre-show was pretty boring so hopefully the show is better.

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