Random News Shit: NFL Free Agent Mania Edition

1) Plaxico Burress Likely To Re-Sign With Either Giants Or Steelers

Well that's dope, he can either go to his first NFL home or his 2nd and last. If I was him, I'd go with the Steelers, not only are they better, but I doubt Pennsylvania would make him do 2 years in prison for shooting himself. Yeah, he had awesome chemistry with Eli Manning, but I'd be like fuck New York if I was Plax.

Welp, at least his has suitors. Before he got locked up, some folks thought he wouldn't play in the NFL again.

2) Jets, Santonio Holmes Agree To 5-Yr/$50 Million Deal

And that's with $24 million dollars in guaranteed money. I know Santonio is a former Super Bowl MVP, but really, he got that much money? He's not even a top 10 WR in the league. Hell, is he even top 15? This is an atrocious deal, but oh well fuck it, at least they probably won't be able to sign Nnamdi Asomugha or re-sign Braylon Edwards. Wait a minute...

3) DeAngelo Williams Re-Signs With The Panthers
The deal is worth $43 million over 5 years with $21 million in guaranteed money. Sucks for the Dolphins because I know they didn't want to bring Ronnie Brown back and probably don't want to bring Marion Barber in. Oh well, the Panthers paid damn near everybody today so it'd only make sense for them to back up the Brinks truck for DeAngelo.

4) Sidney Rice Leaves Minnesota For Seattle

I guess he wasn't a big fan of the Donovan McNabb trade. Oh well, at least he gets to catch passes from Tavaris Jackson again. Awesome.

Anyway, the deal with the Seahawks is 5-years/$41 million.

The Seahawks also snapped up Robert Gallery from the Raiders today.

5) Chargers Give Eric Weddle 5-Yr/$40 Million Deal
With $19 million in guaranteed money. Yep, that makes Weddle the highest paid safety in the league. I won't lie, I wanted the guy in a Cowboys' uniform, but not that bad. I ain't mad at him though, get that paper.

6) Matt Hasselbeck Joins The Titans
No word on how long the deal is or how much it's worth, but now it's only a matter of time before Vince Young hits the free agent pool. He may be the last decent QB left in it by then too.

7) Cowboys Give Doug Free $32 Million For 4 Years

Nice! Now we need some help in for secondary. It won't matter how strong our offensive line is if our DBs can't stop anybody. Go get Cromartie or Joseph!

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Jets Rob Steelers For WR Holmes, Leave Behind 5th Round Pick At Scene Of The Crime

Man, where was The Situation to warn us a robbery was in progress?? I mean shit! Santonio Holmes, aka the best receiver on your team, you trade him to the Jets for a 5th round draft pick?? You turn a 26 year-old, former 1st round draft pick, Super Bowl MVP, and 1,000 receiver into a 5th round "maybe I'll make the team, maybe I won't" pick?? You can't tell me that's not a robbery. I'm not willing to be convinced the brass in the Jets organization didn't run into Dan Rooney's office with guns drawn demanding this trade. It's the only conclusion that makes any bit of sense.

Seriously though, what the fuck?? And where was Jerry Jones when this robbery was taking place?? After being robber by the Lions in 2008, ol' Jerry should have been first in line to commit this crime!

Dan Rooney like the bizarro Al Davis now. That's right, instead of bringing in over-the-hill players for ridiculously high prices, Rooney gives young players entering their prime away for ridiculously low prices. Nice.

And here's the biggest question stemming from this trade (besides what gun the Jets used in the robbery, of course): What does this mean for Big Ben Roethlisberger?? Is this a warning?? Is he gonna get traded too?? Can they score a 7th rounder and a few practice footballs for him?? I don't know, but I'm intrigued.

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I Told You

I'm not gonna lie, it was closer than I anticipated, but I told you the Steelers were gonna win. Great game. Great, great game. The NFL season truly went out with a bang tonight...and now I'm sad lol. Shout out to that boy Santonio "Eh, Wassup" Holmes straight outta Belle Glades taking home that MVP! Nine catches for 131 yards and the biggest touchdown of his life.

Since we're talking about the Super Bowl, how bad were the commercials?? I mean that was just a poor fuckin' job by everybody's creative departments lol. And the NFL needs to do better with their half time show. How about having someone with a hit this millennium.

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