Thursday Billboard Update - 3/4/10

Sade's Soldier Of Love pulls the 3-peat at #1 with 126,600 more albums sold. She'll most likely certify platinum next week, and cross the million mark within the next 5.

The Black Eyed Peas' Imma Be hangs in there at #1 for a 2nd week. Rihanna's Rude Boy bursts into the top 10 but hopping 15 spots 23-8 in just its 3rd week.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Sade - Soldier Of Love (1-1)
2. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (2-2)
3. Johnny Cash - American VI: Ain't No Grave (3)
4. Black Eyed Peas - The E.N.D. (3-4)
5. Lady Gaga - The Fame (4-5)
6. Lil Wayne - Rebirth (5-6)
7. Ke$ha - Animal (14-7)
8. Susan Boyle - I Dreamed A Dream (6-8)
9. Taylor Swift - Fearless (10-9)
10. Justin Bieber - My World (12-10)

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Black Eyed Peas - Imma Be (1-1)
2. Young Money - Bedrock (3-2)
3. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (5-3)
4. Ke$ha - TiK ToK (1-2)
5. Lady GaGa - Bad Romance (4-5)
6. Train - Hey, Soul Sister (7-6)
7. Ludacris - How Low (8-7)
8. Rihanna - Rude Boy (23-8)
9. Trey Songz - Say Aah (10-9)
10. Jason Derulo - In My Head (9-10)

• No big leap for B.o.B's Nothin' On You this week, but it is up 5 spots to #16.
• Ludacris' My Chick Bad, featuring another horrible showing from Nicki Minaj, debuts at #46.
• Roscoe Dash's foolery All The Way Turnt Up with Soulja Boy jumps 19 spots 80-61.
• Kevin Rudolf's I Made It (Cash Money Heroes) leaps 17 spaces 84-67 this week.
• Young Money's Steady Mobbin' also adds 17 to its placement last week going 88-71.
• Monica's Everything To Me keeps the +17 thing going as it flies 90-73.
• Trey Songz's Neighbors Know My Name debuts at #88.
• Yo Gotti and Lil Wayne's Women Lie, Men Lie comes in at #93.
  

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Thursday Billboard Update - 2/25/10

Sade's Soldier Of Love moves another 190,500 and hold on to her #1 for a 2nd week. Nothing else really interesting happened in the top here so lets move on to the Hot 100.

The Black Eyed Peas' Imma Be does this week what I thought it'd do last week, and that's take over the #1 spot from Ke$ha's TiK ToK. Jumping into the top 10 at #10 is Trey Songz's Say Aah. I could be wrong (though I'm probably not), but this is Trey's first trip into the top 10 as the lead on a song. Congrats.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Sade - Soldier Of Love (1-1)
2. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (2-2)
3. Black Eyed Peas - The E.N.D. (8-3)
4. Lady Gaga - The Fame (7-4)
5. Lil Wayne - Rebirth (4-5)
6. Susan Boyle - I Dreamed A Dream (9-6)
7. Alicia Keys - The Element Of Freedom (12-7)
8. Jaheim - Another Round (3-8)
9. Josh Turner - Haywire (5-9)
10. Taylor Swift - Fearless (7-10)

• Freeway and Jake One's Stimulus Package debuts at #63 with 9,100 sold. Not only did I not know this came out, I didn't even know it was an album. I thought the shit was a mixtape. Oh well.
  

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Black Eyed Peas - Imma Be (3-1)
2. Ke$ha - TiK ToK (1-2)
3. Young Money - Bedrock (4-3)
4. Lady GaGa - Bad Romance (5-4)
5. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (6-5)
6. Artists For Haiti - We Are The World 25 (2-6)
7. Train - Hey, Soul Sister (7-7)
8. Ludacris - How Low (8-8)
9. Jason Derulo - In My Head (9-9)
10. Trey Songz - Say Aah (12-10)

• B.o.B's Nothin' On You is on a BEP-esque pace as it jumps another 17 spots 38-21. In 2 more week this track could be well into the top 10. This good news doesn't come without reward as his debut album has been pushed up to an April 27th release date.
• With the success of the video, Rihanna's Rude Boy soars 41 spots 61-23 in its 2nd week.
• Jay-Z's On To The Next On jumps 10 spots 51-41.
• Usher's Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) is up 9 spaces 56-47 this week. (Side note: How out of place is Plies on this record?? He totally fucks up the tempo of the song with his raspy ass aggressive verse. Who is working at Usher's label that let this bullshit fly?? Sad, sad, sad.)
• DJ Khaled's All I Do Is Win featuring Ross, Snoop, T-Pain, & Luda debuting at #64 and has already seen more success than his first single Fed Up.
• Usher's There Goes My Baby comes in at #71 this week. Watch out for this record.
• Coming in dead last is Mariah Carey's Up Out My Face with Nicki Minaj at #100.

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Undercover Parking Ticket Agent: U.P.T.A

Decently funny. At one point I actually thought this was a real movie coming out lol. Gary Owen is the man though. His stand-up has been on point since the 90's so I fucks with him.

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The Ass Whuppin' Explained

Well first off, we know the guy's name now so I don't have to refer to him as "old white dude with the fannie pack" anymore. His name is Thomas Bruso, and is may be clinically insane. That's not even a joke, I mean, did you watch the video?? Thomas is more crazy than trying to buy crack with a credit card (which unfortunately actually happened, but that's news for another post on another day lol).

I feel bad for that guy though, he's so far gone on some Drake shit, but at least he gave us all a great laugh.

Related:
The Comedy Of The "AC Transit Bus Fight"

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Charles Discharged

I guess its a good thing that Charles Hamilton is able to make fun of himself, but once he starts giving the rundown of what his 2009 was like, you start to remember what a lame and a loser he is. Left off that list was getting sonned by Rhymefest and trying to pick a battle with Soulja Boy. Soulja Boy! It don't get no lower than that unless he tried to diss Arab or one of those other lil niggas lol.

Oh well, he was never gonna make it anyway, and this confirmed that fact more than it made me laugh.

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When The Camera Comes On

I've said it once, I'll say it again: somebody needs to give these niggas a show! TV, radio, it don't even matter.

(Side note: If y'all niggas ever do get a show I better be on it in some way because I been campaigning for y'all ass for a long ass time now. Thank you in advice for the opportunity.)

Related:
Deleted Scene from the Movie Precious starring Charlamagne Tha God and Lil Duval!
Regular Thoughts

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The Comedy Of The "AC Transit Bus Fight"

I'm sure everybody has already seen this, but fuck it, you can never see true comedy enough times. There are just so many funny aspect of this video! Most people only get comedy out of the the fact that black dude got his ass whupped by an old white dude, but not me. I found comedy in that black dude looking like he just stepped out of a time machine from L.A. in '92, the old white dude whuppin' ass with a fannie pack on, the old white dude's Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robot-esque fighting style, the black dude acting like he was about to light up a cigarette while on the bus, the old black lady trying to calm the situation before it escalated (and her reaction as the fight was happening), the old white dude saying he'd slap the shit out of the black dude, the person who shouted, "Ayyy! Beat that nigga ass!" during the fight, the fact the bus driver not got up or even said a word the whole time, the white girl in the purple skirt with the headphones on the black dude sits by at the end who acts like nothing just happened, the black dude asking for somebody to "bring the ambalamps," and that he'd kill the old white dude after the "ambalamps" came. All comedy gold lol.

The not so funny part are the people saying the chick, who was brave enough to bring us this hilarious clip, stole the guy's bag and are posting her full name and address on the internet. By her own admission, she was just holding it for when the police came, but even if she did steal it, that's no reason to look the girl up and put her address on the internet. That's some weirdo stalker shit. I mean, you'd think it was a Louis Vuitton bag stuff with money they way people are reacting. Yeah, she shouldn't have even bothered picking it up, but fuck it, its not like there was anything in there of any value.

Anyway, here's a 2nd clip somebody shot with a camera phone after the fight on the bus.


More comedy gold, you gotta love it lol.

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Beanie Sigel Dissing Jay-Z & T.I. Live On Stage

MUCH better than those lazy bars he put down back in November. Two questions though: 1) Who was that loud ass dick rider in the crowd that was so amp'd and 2) why Beans going at T.I.??

Anyway, I thought Beans had moved on from this Jay-Z shit?? He's got to know Jay is never gonna respond and that he's just gonna continue to be a dog barking at the moon. Sige, move on my dude. Move on.

Related:
Beanie Sigel - How I Could Kill Jigga Man
Beanie Sigel Spits Some Bars Dissing Jay-Z
Beanie Sigel - I Go Off (feat. 50 Cent)
Beanie Sigel Joins G-Unit, Talks Jay-Z & Dame Dash
Beanie Sigel - What You Talkin' Bout (Jay-Z Diss)

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Hey, Mr. Cartel

They've done it again! I especially liked that under Drake's weaknesses was "ACL" and "Canadian" lol. The funniest part is the "if the bottom falls out" section with Lil Chuckee and Lil Twist. Both hilarious and true lol.

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Tracy Morgan On Jimmy Kimmel Live

Even though his new movie "Cop Out" looks awful, this is still a pretty entertaining interview. Then again, what Tracy Morgan interview isn't entertaining?? This was rather tame if you've seen some of his older ones back he was drinking lol.

The 2nd half is after the jump.

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Pornstar Pinky Turns To Rap & I Wonder If We Could Turn Her Back??

Seriously, what the fuck?? If for some reason you didn't think Hip-Hop was in the crapper, look no further.

Aight, now cameraman, get a tight zoom on my face, I got something important to say:

Pinky, why are you doing this to me?? You've brought me so much joy (and pleasure) in my days, but in the past year or 2, you've done nothing but disappoint me. First you got fat and started making wack pornos, and now you're trying to be a rapper. Why?? What did I ever do to you, Pinky?? No, seriously, what did I do to deserve this?? You went from being one of the hottest chicks in the porn game to a fat wannabe rapper. This saddens my life.

Here's what I'm gonna need you to do Pinky:

1) Put the microphone down.
2) Take your right foot, pull it behind, let it go, and kick the microphone out of your vicinity.
3) Hit the gym.
4) Hit the gym some more.
5) Go buy a camera and some baby oil.
6) Rent a house out in L.A.
7) Find Mr. Marcus, Mandingo, or some of those porno dudes.
8) And make a fuckin' movie!

Is that so much to ask for?? I didn't think so! C'mon son, fuck outta here with this rapping bullshit and get back to the porn!

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Get Him To The Greek Trailer

Remember when I told you this was on the horizon for this April, last April?? Probably not, that's why I'm providing this link.

Anyway, I'll be honest, this trailer was a bit disappointing to me. I was thinking Jonah Hill would be reprising his character from "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" that was an Aldous Snow groupie. Nope, new character. In fact, in this spin-off, the only character to be carried over is Russell Brand as Aldous Snow. I'm not mad at that, but I had my hopes up for Jonah's old character as well. Oh well, I guess.

"Get Him To The Greek" in theaters this summer on June 4th.

(Side note: How bad is Diddy's comedic timing?? I mean shit! He may just be a terrible actor, but I'm gonna blame it on poor comedic timing right now. That shit was brutal lol.)

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Thursday Billboard Update - 2/18/10

Real music is back! I'm glad to report that taking over atop the Billboard 200 this week is Sade's Soldier Of Love with a grand total of 502,000 sold first week. Would be 502,001, but I couldn't find the damn album in Target! I went to 2 different Targets too! Times like these make me wish Circuit City never went out of business. Anyway, also debuting this week is Jaheim's Another Round comes in at #3 with 112,100 sold.

Artist For Haiti's We Are The World 25 debuts at #2 this week. I still haven't heard it yet, but I haven't heard many glowing reviews.

The Billboard 200 1-10
first week debuts in bold

1. Sade - Soldier Of Love (1)
2. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (1-2)
3. Jaheim - Another Round (3)
4. Lil Wayne - Rebirth (2-4)
5. Josh Turner - Haywire (5)
6. Toby McKeehan - Tonight (6)
7. Lady Gaga - The Fame (4-7)
8. Black Eyed Peas - The E.N.D. (6-8)
9. Susan Boyle - I Dreamed A Dream (9-9)
10. Taylor Swift - Fearless (7-10)

The Billboard Hot 100 1-10
first time top 10's in bold

1. Ke$ha - TiK ToK (1-1)
2. Artists For Haiti - We Are The World 25 (2)
3. Black Eyed Peas - Imma Be (2-3)
4. Young Money - Bedrock (4-4)
5. Lady GaGa - Bad Romance (5-5)
6. Lady Antebellum - Need You Now (3-6)
7. Train - Hey, Soul Sister (7-7)
8. Ludacris - How Low (8-8)
9. Jason Derulo - In My Head (11-9)
10. David Guetta - Sexy Chick (6-10)

• B.o.B's Nothin' On You makes another sizeable in its 3rd week as it goes north 27 space 65-38.
• Guess who is debuting at #46 this week?? I'll give you a hint: he's old, he's a general and his like his pants off the ground! That's right, General Larry Platt's sensation Pants On The Ground actually debuted on the Billboard 100 this week! Madness.
• As her album takes over at #1, Sade's title track Soldier Of Love jumps 28 spots 80-52 in its 5th week.
• Usher's Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) with Plies makes a move this week soaring 16 spots 72-56.
• With the great response the video received upon its release last week, Rihanna's Rude Boy debuts at #64.
• Monica's Everything To Me debuts at #82.
• Waka Flocka Flame's O Let's Do It debuts at #95.

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